"Bro there ain't no need for you to be all up and enjoying this motherfucking shit," he said.
Gamzee Makara was an odd boy. From the moment he showed up at Tavros Nitram's dorm with his suitcase half-opened, clothes spilling out at odd angles from within it, and an overwhelming stench of less-than-legal substances and cigarette smoke all over him, Tavros knew his new roommate would be a handful.
Tavros was in his first year of university, while Gamzee, his third. This hadn't been his first rodeo. He was highly intelligent, artistic, creative, though incredibly… odd. Though there was a level of charisma about him, that seemed to draw people. Tavros was rather smart, though sensitive and shy. He had few friends, but they were close to him.
"Dig the hawk, bro," Gamzee had said as he wheeled his suitcase into the room. He kicked it to the corner on his side of the room, and flung his tall, lanky figure onto the bed, with a heavy sigh. He was clearly under the influence of something, though Tavros had learned that this wasn't an unfamiliar thing to Gamzee.
"Uhh," Tavros stammered, his hand finding his hair, where his short, thick Mohawk adorned his scalp. "Thanks, I guess. I'm Tavros."
"Sup bro," Gamzee grinned, tossing his too-long legs out of the bed, and sitting up. He extended his arm, his fingers slender and long and rather warm as they wrapped around Tavros's much less impressive hand. "I been named motherfucking Gamzee, bro. I'mma be the best roommate you ever done have."
His hair was far too long, and extended at odd, awkward, haphazard angles about his head. His face was slender and, like his body, seemed to be almost void of body fat, despite how much he ate – he constantly ate. His eyes were practically regularly half-lidded, unless closed, and his thin lips were always stretched into a large, goofy grin. He spoke in an odd, roundabout way that made him difficult to understand at times. Though his voice was deep and melodious, and while he spoke almost endlessly during his stoned stupors, it seemed to ease Tavros into a deep sleep, despite his lack of participation in Gamzee's smoking endeavours.
Every day, Gamzee would sleep thirty minutes after his alarm went off, had a cup of coffee, showered for almost an hour, dressed in the same disorganised, tossed-together-last-second style of incessantly worn-out clothes that were whimsical, absurd, and far too big for him, smoked a bowl, and then went to his class, showing up ten minutes late. Tavros, meanwhile, heaved himself up after his snooze went off a second time, five minutes after the first, had a cup of coffee, showered for twenty minutes, dressed in his standard "jeans and t-shirt" style, and showed up to class five minutes early. After classes, Tavros would show up at the dorm around the same time every day, sometimes later if his friends got together, would take care of any homework, study, and then head to bed. Gamzee would appear at odd times, always stoned, always laughing, always waking the former up, or distracting him from his studies.
After about a month of this, one weekend, Gamzee was doodling idly in his bed, legs hanging in the air, and Tavros's eyes were on him from behind his laptop. This was standard. Tavros hadn't had a girlfriend for many years. He had still been recovering from an abusive relationship. Since then, he had been in the process of discovering his sexuality, and although his curiosities were mildly suppressed, they were always fully awakened when Gamzee was about.
Gamzee, meanwhile, was in an odd on-and-off relationship with someone named "Terezi", and often mentioned a "Karkat" rather fondly. He spoke often of such things. He'd ask how Tavros's day was and just sit and listen to him, and then drawl out his own response about his daily activities. But the more time passed, the more they began to speak far more than small talk to each other.
In fact, it grew to conversations about each other on a far more personal level. Gamzee felt some odd connection to a band he quite enjoyed – almost to the level of accepting it as a religion. Tavros, meanwhile, was far simpler than him, though Gamzee had managed to get him to open up about his ex, Vriska, who severely verbally, physically, and sexually abused him.
"Man, when shit like that goes all up and gets down, you just gotta be holding your motherfucking head up high, bro, learn from them fucking mishappenings and learn to rock without that shit," he said, before exhaling a deep toke. Tavros merely blinked in an attempt to understand, before laughing nervously, and nodding. Gamzee then brought his lips to his pipe and went to take another inhale, before frowning. "You's better than that shit, brother." He then proceeded to take the hit.
Gamzee put his doodling pad down, and crossed his legs, turning to face Tavros.
"Let's get the motherfuck outta here," he said, slapping his knobby knees.
"Uhh," Tavros's eyes widened and he quickly looked away, as he had been lost in staring again, and looked down to his laptop screen. "Where is there to go?"
"Man I ain't been in motherfucking knowledge of that shit bro," he stood up and tossed Tavros's hoodie at him, before pulling one on himself, and grabbing a pack of cigarettes, and his lighter. "I just been thinking that we gotta get real up and go now."
Tavros slowly climbed off his bed, his eyes wide. "You aren't like, being followed by someone or anything, are you?" he asked, rather quickly.
Gamzee merely laughed that perfect laugh that sounded like warm caramel being poured into Tavros's mind, and took Tavros's hands, before leading him the fuck outta the dorm building, into the streets. It was almost midnight, and the moon hung high in the sky, its pale light shadowed by the yellow light cast by the streetlamps onto the wet asphalt below. Gamzee lit up a cigarette, and Tavros watched as his long, gangly legs moved him forward as he took extended, seemingly endless strides. Tavros followed closely behind him, clutching himself and looking around in the darkness. The smell of Gamzee's cigarette faded, and Tavros gasped, before jogging to catch up.
The back of the school dorm looked out to the water, and Gamzee adored spending time there. He often bought stale bread from the cafeteria and fed the various creatures which he seemed to draw to the shores for his baked offerings. His hoodie's pockets were currently stuffed with what remained from the morning before. Tavros had spent many a time walking through the campus, to notice the odd boy sitting at the edge of the water, in the sand, without caring about the condition of his clothing, and tossing chunks of bread into the water for the ducks and things.
Gamzee ventured there, Tavros in toe. Before reaching the edge of the water, a small inlet, surrounded by trees which darkened the area even further, Gamzee thrust his hands into his pockets, and produced a handful of bread chunks, which he handed to Tavros. Tavros made a sound to reject, but he knew of Gamzee's persistence, and held out both his hands for the single handful. Gamzee then grinned in reply, and continued to lead Tavros to the spot.
Beside the small area, was a tall set of stairs, which lead further down to the water, and a beach area where, in summer, many of the students often spent time. Gamzee avoided that area, and instead jumped down, carefully, to the rocky inlet, where the ducks felt far more comfortable, than at the busy communal beach area. He tossed a few bread chunks into the water, before turning and extending his hand to Tavros, who swallowed hard, before taking it, and jumping down to ground below. He looked to the water, which seemed perfectly still and dark, safe for those chunks of bread floating, and absorbing their fill of the water.
Mere moments passed, and there was a sudden influx of birds flapping their wings and splashing about, embarking towards them. Tavros couldn't help but utter an enthusiastic gasp, to which Gamzee replied with a broad grin.
"Throw some in," he instructed.
Tavros looked to his, clutching the overflowing amounts of stale bread, before he took some pieces with his other hand, and nonchalantly tossed it at the impending water-dwelling birds. He giggled with joy as duck quickly gobbled up a large chunk, and the others followed suit. Tavros squatted downwards, and tossed in a few more pieces, prompting the ducks to get closer. Gamzee leaned against a tree, smoking his cigarette, watching him with a contended smirk.
Once the crumbs were gone, Gamzee produced two bottles of some odd, fruity soda from his seemingly endless pockets, and handed one to Tavros, who peered into it curiously, and proceeded to taste it. It wasn't horrible, but Gamzee clearly enjoyed it far more than Tavros did. He climbed the tree against which he had been leaning, and dangled his legs down on either side of a low-hanging branch. Tavros, meanwhile, perched himself onto a large rock, which jutted out from the shore. For the remainder of the night, beneath the moonlight, they sipped Faygo, and talked, while Gamzee smoked cigarette after cigarette.
"Why do you smoke so much?" Tavros asked at one point. "I mean, everything you smoke."
"I ain't been really in the knowledge of that motherfucking shit no more, bro," Gamzee replied, sighing as he eyed the burning ember at the end of the white cylinder. "Karkat's been really all up in my motherfucking grill about quitting, but I don't been much seein' the point, y'know?"
"Aren't you worried it's making you unhealthy?" he asked. "And scrambling your brain?"
"There ain't been nothing that can fuck up this here pan already more than it's been fucked up, bro," Gamzee replied, with a lop-sided grin, bearing his teeth.
The conversation drifted from random, childhood memories, to thoughts about the future, to each other's love life – from recent past, to long ago past, to present, to future. About Tavros's childhood upbringing, working on a dairy farm where he was raised to take care of cows and bulls alike, to Gamzee explaining how his mother walked out on him a few years after he was born, and left him and his father in crap living conditions, working two jobs each, to afford to thrive. They spoke until the moon swam through the sky, and hung low in the darkness. Eventually, Tavros yawned, and Gamzee dropped down from the tree.
"C'mon, bro," he said. "Time to get you some motherfucking shut-eye."
Tavros awoke the next morning, smelling like stale cigarettes, to an empty room. There was a sticky-note pasted to the top of his laptop, which had been sitting upon the bed, and in long, scribbly handwriting, it read "HaD a GrEaT mOtHeRfUcKiNg TiMe LaSt NiGhT. wE bEsT bE aLl Up N eNjOyInG tHeMs NiGhT tImE wAnDeRiNgS aGaIn, BrO. tHeM fEeLiNgS jAm Be SoMeThInG wE bOtH gEt MoThErFuCkInG uSe Of. Be SeEiN yOu ToNiGhT" Tavros couldn't help but smile and clutch the note for a long moment, before preparing himself for class. Everything just seemed to be going far too well.
Too well, indeed.
Gamzee had elected to return home to see his dad, who was rather ill and in the hospital. Of course, there was not much Tavros could do while the other man was away, so he spent most of his time texting Gamzee to see how he was doing, under the circumstances. Gamzee assured him that Tavros had no need to worry about him, and should instead be worrying about himself. It had taken a long while before Tavros clicked the "send" button, and sent off a text that described how much he longed to be with Gamzee – hoping the odd man wouldn't take him the way his heart intended. Gamzee replied with "BrO, yOu KnOw HoW mUcH tHaT wOuLd Be MaKiN tHiS fOoLiShNeSs MoThErFuCkInG eAsIeR". Tavros sighed and said his goodnights to the other man, before laying back on his bed, and staring up at the ceiling. He thrust his hands into his pocket, and felt the crumbs remaining from pervious bread-chunk, duck-feeding endeavours, and a smile befell his face.
Before he knew what he was doing, he was venturing towards the inlet where Gamzee and Tavros had spent many an evening. The hallways had been dark and empty, so no one questioned him. His eyes still followed the walls, however, as he passed many a poster, including a sign warning of a student's missing bird-eating tarantula, and a band tryout held later in the week. When he got outside, the fresh air felt clean and cool, and he inhaled it deeply, comforted by the thought of his friend at his side.
His pockets where void of nourishment for the ducks, unfortunately, but the sight of them made him smile regardless. As he carefully descended the shallow cliff, to the rocky shore, the ducks already made their slow, cautious way towards him, perplexed by the lack of the other man who usually accompanied. He made a verbal apology to the birds, before sitting upon the rock, and looking out to the water, curiously.
The beach was visible from the inlet, and he saw something that caught his eye. Not just one thing, but two. A rather large something was being mercilessly attacked by a screeching seagull, looking for a succulent meal. A wave of emotion washed over him for a moment, and he felt inclined to attempt to rescue the poor creature, regardless of the hour or the fact that even if he saved the poor thing, it would probably end up being attacked by something else.
He lifted himself from the cliff, and ascended to the grass line, ducks quacking behind him in protest. He then ventured towards the stairs. He produced his phone from his pocket, and shone the light onto the wet stairs. They were steep and long, and lead down to the man-made beach below, which extended out into the water. In the darkness, it looked like a gradient, dissolving into a void of blackness. He carefully stepped down, just as his phone chirped to notify him of a dangerously low battery. He huffed and looked back out to the silhouettes. The thing appeared to look like a spider, but there was no telling for sure – what would an absurdly large spider be doing on the beach behind his dorm? He frowned and took another careful step, the railing slippery from a recent rainfall.
His phone beeped again, to notify him that the battery wouldn't last much longer, and therefore, neither would his light source. As he carefully took another step downwards, his foot slipped slightly to the side, and he gasped, clinging to the railing to stabilise himself. Once he was on his feet, he took another step, and another, his phone uttering another warning beep.
It beeped frantically only once more, before the light went out, and Tavros was left standing in the darkness. He swallowed hard, and reached his hand out for the next chunk of railing, his foot plunging into the darkness, until it found solidity. He carefully took the step, before jutting his other leg out to make the same motion. However, he failed to notice a rather large puddle consuming the next step, due to the darkness which encompassed him, and his foot slipped forward out from beneath him. He grasped frantically for the railing, but the water clinging to it, made it too slippery. Before he knew it, he was tumbling backwards down the stairs. He attempted to stabilise himself, but he overcompensated, and flipped forwards, cracking his head, neck, and back on the stairs. The pain which had been shooting through his entire body, suddenly seized, and everything went numb.
Next thing he knew, he was laying at the bottom of the stairs. His small body shook as he slowly lifted his head, thankful that he could even do so, to view his legs. They were behind him and bent at awkward angles, suggesting that they were both probably broken. However, he could not feel any pain in them. Not even the dull throbbing which usually accompanied broken bones. Nothingness. He panicked, his breath shaking, before attempting to call out, but his voice couldn't find him. His arms slowly moved, though he suspected a broken wrist in one, but from his waist down, was a distinct lack of feeling.
He peered forward and saw the two silhouettes in the distance. The seagull shrieked and plunged for the large spider, but the spider swatted at it, and backed away towards Tavros. He dug his hands into the wet sand below him, and pushed himself forward, towards the silhouettes, hoping that perhaps the numbness would go away and he would find his voice, if he merely persisted upon his goal. He dragged himself towards the spider, before witnessing the seagull finally sink its beak into one of the spider's legs. It lifted the poor thing off the ground, and shook its head, sending it flying towards Tavros, without its leg. Tavros gasped and winced as the thing landed a meter or so away from him.
He crawled towards it, his legs still unfeeling, tears streaming down his face with the panic and pain that he could feel. His hand swam from a possible concussion, but he persisted in his endeavour. Eventually, he reached the spider, and found that it had been covered in wounds: fatal stab wounds in its abdomen and thorax, and it was missing an eye and a leg. The poor thing wouldn't survive, that much was true. Tavros spotted a rock nearby, which he could have used to end the poor thing's suffering. He eyed the rock for a long moment, before glancing to the spider, who twitched its remaining legs, attempting to return its coordinates and maybe run off, in hopes of survival. Tavros reached for the rock and clutched it tightly, staring at the poor, incessant, dying creature. He held the rock above it for a long moment, before his arm gave out from weakness, and the added weight, and he dropped the rock to his side. He couldn't kill the poor thing. He simply laid beside it, unconsciousness grasping at him, pulling him into the darkness, lying helplessly beside the dying spider.