You Did What?, a stargate: sg-1 fanfic

Title: You Did What?

Category: Um, humour?

Season: 1

Summary: After an off world indiscretion, Jack is in trouble with General Hammond

Author's Note: Inspired by the weekly fic challenge on the As the Stargate Turns Yahoo Group (issued 4 Feb), to use the phrase "you did what?" and/or the word "sunrise" in a fic. This uses both. Not beta read.

You Did What?

"You did what?" Hammond exclaimed in horror when he realised the full extent of O'Neill's indiscretion. If he hadn't overheard an inadvertent comment made by Daniel Jackson no doubt SG-1 would have covered this up. As it was, the secret was out.

"I'm sorry, sir, but I don't know what came over me. It was hot on that planet, even at night. There was a beautiful sunrise, the water looked blue, cool and inviting… I just needed to… um… let down my hair, sir. It was irresistible." O'Neill stood ramrod straight, his neutral expression giving nothing away, but Hammond knew he would be ashamed of himself.

"Let down your hair? Like that? In front of your team?" Hammond's lips thinned into an expression of disapproval.

"Um, well, in front of Carter, sir."

Hammond's blood pressure levels increased a notch and he stared at the colonel incredulously.

"In front of Carter? A subordinate, and a young woman? Colonel, I hope you're ashamed!"

O'Neill's carefully schooled expression wavered slightly and Hammond could see his shame on his face for one brief moment before he slipped the emotionless mask back into place.

"I'm… mortified, sir."

"Oh? I'm not sure that helps your situation. Maybe Doctor Fraser can find an acceptable explanation. I'll consider the question of disciplinary action once her test results come back." He peered at O'Neill sternly. "D-did anything happen? Between you and Captain Carter, that is?"

"Happen, sir?" O'Neill looked puzzled for a moment and then realised what Hammond was driving at, more embarrassed than ever. "Absolutely not, sir!"

He declined to mention Carter had came close to joining him in his madness, and he'd actively encouraged her. Why get both of them into trouble? If it hadn't been for Daniel's abrupt arrival on the scene, she probably would have. It had been so close, way too close for comfort. He was totally discombobulated by the notion. For crying out loud, the woman was a member of his team!

Sure, she was beautiful, hot even, but he'd never come that close to being so tempted by a subordinate before. She'd started removing her clothes, dammit! And he had to grudgingly admit he would have enjoyed it if she had joined him. Who knew what might have happened?

Hammond appeared to be slightly mollified and relieved by the colonel's reassurance, and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "All right, colonel, you're dismissed for now, but you're confined to the base. We'll talk again when I know more from Doctor Fraser."

O'Neill nearly sighed with relief at the reprieve, albeit temporary. It was humiliating to be standing here in front of his CO discussing this situation.

"Thank you, sir," he said and quickly left the room. He needed to find his team and tell them what he'd revealed. He didn't want Carter making the mistake of confessing when she didn't need to.

After he left, Hammond let loose the chuckle he'd been suppressing while O'Neill was there, shaking his head with amusement at the picture the unfortunate incident brought to mind.

'My, oh my, that sure beats all,' he thought. 'I'd never have pegged Jack O'Neill as the kind of guy to go skinny dipping.'