Okay, obviously, Bleach does not belong to me, in case for some reason you thought that it did, thus here's the disclaimer. The only characters that belong to me in this chapter are Eon, my muse, and the random people that pop up to torture Toshiro (Obviously not including the Bleach characters). This fic will probably just have five to twelve chapters, depending on how many characters that I can scare up to torture the other squad captains in Soul Society. So far, I only have one for Squad's 10, 12, 11, 6 and 2. So now that I'm done explaining things, sit back, and enjoy!
Also, the characters Axel and Hikaru belong to Miffin the Turtle/The Pudding Fiend.
Welcome to Squad 10: Toshiro's Nightmare
It was close to the deadline, Matsumoto had disappeared to who knows where, and a choir of miscreants continued pop in and call him 'whitey-chan' every five minutes.
Toshiro ran his fingers through his white hair, before yanking it hard. His office...or at least the remains of his office had paper everywhere, most of which were very important documents that he going to give to the General of the Court Divisions, and the entire right side of the office was scorched. There was graffiti written on the door that read, 'do not disturb, midgets at work' and he couldn't find his favourite coffee mug anywhere.
How, in the name of Soul Society, did today turn out like this?
-----------------Morning of The Day: Four hours to total destruction------------------
Toshiro Hitsugaya sat in his office, rushing over a number of documents that he found hidden under the sofa, no doubt Matsumoto's doing. Today was their deadline, yet his irresponsible vice-captain had not even signed, or even looked over one of them; given the fact that they were given to her three and a half months ago, even before the infiltration of Soul Society.
He sighed, before lowering his head onto his desk tiredly. Today was not a good day for him. Not only did he have all of this to work on, the new recruits were joining the squads today! His vice-captain pulled a Houdini act on him, and vanished without a trace, most likely drinking with the eleventh squad; and to top it all off, he couldn't find his favourite coffee mug to get his caffeine intake for the day. What a lovely day it was turning out to be for him.
A knock came from the door, and Toshiro quickly raised his head, and continued to look over the documents, as if he hadn't taken the breather.
"Come in." He said, his voice sounding as serious as ever.
The door opened a crack as the red-headed vice-captain peeked into the office.
"H-hello, Captain!" She announced carefully, though the glare that Toshiro gave her did not help matters in the least. "I...er...you didn't find those...did you...?" She asked, noticing the files that he was looking over.
"Oh no, I didn't find them." Toshiro said, signing one of the files and putting it into a neat pile onto the corner of the desk. "I'd say that they found me, as I sat onto the couch, only to fall over with it." He said, pointing at the overturned couch, obviously put off balance with the number of files that Rangiku had attempted to hide under it.
She giggled nervously. "Well, um...Captain Zaraki sent me here to come and get you for the passing ceremony..." She said, with a small hiccup.
Toshiro slowly put his pen down; a vein showing on his head. He knew it. She was drinking with Squad Eleven! This was the seventh time this week, and it was only Tuesday!
"Then, let's go." He said, as calmly as he could. At times, he wondered how Rangiku even made it into this squad. Surely her...unorganized abilities could better serve elsewhere.
The new recruits were lined up side-by-side in the courtyard, not far from tenth squad's main branch. Toshiro walked casually, along side Rangiku, the rest of his squad following him in an orderly fashion. Once they reached their spot, in between Kenpachi's eleventh squad, and Shuhei Hisagi's (The vice captain's) ninth squad, they halted, and faced the recruits.
There were new faces of Shinigami, all shapes and sizes. Some were tall and strong, others were thin, but most likely fast. Toshiro could not help but wonder what type of Shinigami he would receive into his squad today, hopefully ones with better organized than Rangiku at least.
It was that, one thought, which probably threw off that balance of this day completely. That was only how Toshiro could see it anyway, looking back on this disastrous day.
The General of the Court Divisions, Captain Yamamoto, began his usual speech of introduction, noting how Shinigami of the past, present, and future, will and have all fought valiantly for the sake of both Soul Society, and the Living World. He spoke of the hardships that Soul Society had just faced, with the betrayal of fifth squad captain, Aizen, as well as third squad's captain, Gin Ichimaru, and ninth squad's captain Tosen.
Toshiro did not need to move his head to see the hard expressions of the vice-captains of third and ninth's squad's faces; and fifth squad did not even have a vice-captain in their place. The fifth squad seemed lost, their expressions clouded with grief, as well as some looking at one another, unsure of how to act for such an occasion.
Finally, the General of the Court Divisions finished his speech, ending it off by noting how there were fewer Shinigami this year than the last, and approached the recruits. He handed each of them a small scroll, and congratulated them for passing the training. Once all of the new recruits received their scrolls, containing which squad that they were in, or so it seemed, the General of the Court Divisions dismissed everyone to go and find their squads.
That was when they came in...
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIITTTT!" Yelled a high pitched voice, before three more new recruits came running up from the roofs, before jumping down, just before the rest of the Shinigami.
The first two, one thin and around 5'8", with a lightning bolt tattoo through one of her eyes, and the second, short with long silver hair, landed perfectly. The third one, though, much taller and broader than the other two, fell from the roofs, and landed face-first into the cold floor of Seireitei.
He didn't more.
Panic filled the air as some of the new recruits, most likely the unfortunate fourth squad-to-be's, called out "Is he okay?!"
The large Shinigami still did not stir, but the black-haired one leaned down and poked him.
"Are you okay, Hikki?" She asked.
The blonde-haired boy stuck his head up instantly, and looked around, (even though his eyes were shut...) before slowly pushing himself up, and saying, "Yes." In the most monotonous way that Toshiro had ever heard in his life. And he did not have a short one, contrarily to how he appeared.
The shortest one waved her hands wildly, obviously in a desperate attempt to come up with something to say to General of the Court Divisions. He of course, though, only smiled at the three of them, before handing them their scrolls as well.
"Thanks, old dude!" The black haired one said cheerfully. Whether he took it to offence or not, no one really knew, but the General only said back to the three of them,
"Do not make this a habit." And headed back inside of Seireitei.
Other than the interruption of the end, it was a pretty normal ceremony, no? Little did he know, what chaos this would invoke for later...
---------------------------------The Day: Three hours to total Destruction---------------------------
Toshiro sat in his office, yet again attempting to finish the pile-full of work that Matsumoto had left him to do. He read through the sheets quickly, now beginning to skip lines after he understood the point of the document.
'Property damage from the invasion''Squad twelve demanding a raise''A letter of complaint about Matsumoto...'
He signed all of them without even thinking, and placed them into three separate piles, each depending on who or where they would be sent. He then grabbed another sheet, and began to read over it, almost not hearing the light knock that came from the door.
"Come in." He said without looking up, as the short girl from the ceremony from before entered the room.
"Uh...Hi!" She announced, the white and blue dog that she was carrying barking in agreement.
Toshiro looked up for a moment at her and, what he presumed was her pet, before going back to signing his papers.
"I see that you have made it into my squad." He noted, signing yet another complaint about Matsumoto becoming drunk in the twelve-squad's labs.
"Yeah!" She chirped, bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet. "Nice to meet you, oh cap-i-tan!" and she attempted a solute, only to, for one thing, drop the dog, who howled loudly with shock, and two, stab herself in the eye.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!" She yelled, rolling on the floor in agony, the dog jumping out of her way.
Toshiro stood up, dropping the files that he was just holding as he ran over to the other side of his desk, only to step onto the dog's tail.
The puppy howled in agony as well, and the sudden shock knocked Toshiro back, into his desk.
It was like slow motion as files from the three, organized piles tipped over, onto the high, unorganized, and unsigned pile, and onto the floor.
Toshiro stopped himself from screaming at the girl, who was still rolling around in pain; or at east, that was until the dog that was with her started to run around in wild circles, little spikes of its fur sticking into files, and spreading them into an even bigger mess than it already was.
"RECRUIT!" Toshiro yelled, the girl slowly stopping in front of his feet, but the dog only howled once more, before racing out the open door, some files still attached to its back.
The girl stood up slowly, rubbing the eye that she stabbed, and looked at him, nearly at eye level.
"What in the name of Soul Society did you think that you were doing, bringing a pet into here?!" He demanded.
The girl stood there for a moment, then looked confused.
"What pet?" She asked.
Toshiro was now more furious than ever today.
"The dog!" He yelled.
The girl gasped.
"DOG?! Aisu is not a dog, or a pet!" She said, pointing at Toshiro. "She's a trusted companion, like you and your captain!"
Even though it has happened so many times before, Toshiro could not help but let it get under his skin this time.
"And my captain?" He asked, a vein appearing on his head. "I am the captain of tenth squad!" He announced, standing on his toes in an attempt to seem taller then the girl. It did not work very well.
She stared at him for a moment, before bursting into hysterical laughter.
"Y-you?! Ca-captain?!" She asked through laughs. She began to clutch her stomach she was laughing so hard. "You're not even taller than me!"
Toshiro's vein seemed to grow with every laugh.
"ENOUGH!" He yelled, jabbing a finger hard into her chest. "I am your captain, and you will obey my orders! UNDERSTAND?!"
The girl stopped laughing for a moment, and appeared to now be serious.
"Yes sir." She said.
Toshiro tried not to grin to himself. See? Even if he did look like the way that he did, he could still keep his squad under control.
"Alright! Your first order..." He stopped, remembering that they did not know her name.
"Eon." She answered.
"Your first order, Eon, is to retrieve those lost documents. You have an hour." He said, dismissing her.
She did not move though.
"What are you waiting for?" He asked. "Did you not hear me?"
"Oh, I heard you." Eon said, and grinned. "Whitey-chan."
Toshiro froze, attempting not to draw his Zanpakuto.
"What...did...you...say...?" he asked, his head slowly turning her way.
"I said that I heard you. Whitey-chan."
Toshiro was now having the second war with the Quincy's in his head. To kill, or not to kill, that was the question. Before he could say anything, though, eon skipped out of the room cheerfully, leaving Toshiro alone yet again. He sighed, it being peaceful at last, and started to pick up a few of the documents, before he heard some giggling from outside of his door.
What...? He wondered, but heed it no mind, and continued to sort through the mess of documents, some of which would have to be rewritten completely.
Some more giggling came from just outside his door. What was so funny out there? Again, though, Toshiro ignored it and kept picking up the papers.
Finally, a familiar giggle came from the door as Matsumoto walked in, holding a bottle of hard Vodka, which she attempted to hide behind her back as soon as she saw him looking at her.
"What's so funny, Matsumoto?" Toshiro questioned, not even caring about the Vodka right now; there were too many things to do.
"Um, n-nothing, Captain!" She said, edging towards the door, yet another obvious attempt to hide something from him.
Toshiro sighed as he finished picking up another torn sheet, before throwing it into a pile of to-repair files. He stood up and headed towards the door that she attempted to hide, but Matsumoto blocked the way.
"Step aside, Matsumoto." He said coolly.
Rangiku shook her head. "Y-you don't want to go out there..."
"Matsumoto, do you really want me to put you on probation, with no breaks... or alcohol?" He question.
Rangiku opened her mouth wide. This was not something that she could lose, no matter how the captain reacted when he walked through that door. Slowly, she stepped aside for him to pass, and took a large chug of the Vodka. This would end badly...
"Thank you." Toshiro said as he stepped out of the office. It took a minute to figure out what everyone was laughing at as he looked around the hallway. No one was around, doing anything stupid, or even i the hallway for that matter; so what was funny? That was when he spotted it...
On the door to his office, written in black, permanent marker, (Where the culprit got it from ,was unknown)read the words, "Do Not Disturb, Midgets at Work!"
Out of all of the foolish, ridiculous things that anyone has done today, this had toped it off, as well as add a few more points to Toshiro's blood pressure. He ran his fingers through his snow-white hair, a desperate attempt to stay calm, and to not throttle Matsumoto. Killing his Vice-Captain would only lead to more unnecessary paper work, as much as he wished to do so.
"Matsumoto..." He began, hearing her take another large swig of the Vodka. "Who did this to my door...?"
Rangiku finished the rest of her bottle, and threw it over her should, where it crashed into the right side of the office's wall.
"The newest recruit for sixth squad...said his name was Ax---Ax...something like that..." She said, trying to remember her current hero's name. The alcohol did not help.
Toshiro could not believe what he just heard. Someone from sixth squad?! The squad that has the motto, "Noble Reasoning"?! Was she really that drunk?!
-------------------------------The Day: Two hours to total destruction---------------------------
Toshiro sat at his desk, reading through a number of the non-damaged files that he had been able to rescue from mess. He had sent Matsumoto to go down to sixth squad and get this 'Ax-whatever', to answer for his crimes.
A knock came from the door, but before Toshiro could say, "come in", the familiar, black-haired menace from the ceremony kicked the door open, making it swing off of its top hinge.
Toshiro knew that all of this stress was not good for his health, as he said, as calmly as he could, "It was open, you know."
"Oh, really?" She said, looking at the door, but shrugged as if nothing had ever happened. "So, Whaddya want, whitey-chan?" She asked.
Blood Pressure up two points.
"Whitey-chan...?" Toshiro asked himself, digging his fingers into his desk; another futile attempt at keeping sane. "Was it you that wrote that on my door?" He asked, pointing at the 'do not disturb' sign.
After about a minute of looking at the door, a minute that Toshiro believed rose his blood pressure another two points, the answer came as a "yes."
"Then why, may I ask, would you do that? Are you not in sixth squad, like Matsumoto said?" Toshiro questioned the youth.
"Yep! Sure am!" The answer was quite cheerful for someone that had already defaced property, raised his blood pressure by who knows how much, had been drinking by the smell, and even broken the very foundations of her squad. How was she even in sixth squad with such an attitude?
Toshiro sighed, rubbing his eyebrows. "All right; what is your name then, recruit." He said, picking up a pen, ready to write a complain notice to Byakuya, leader of sixth squad.
"Axel."
Toshiro stopped. "Is that not a boy's name, recruit?" He asked, narrowing his eyes.
"Yeah, so?" The recruit asked back.
Toshiro sighed again. "Are you not a girl, recruit?" He asked, this day beginning to drain him.
"What?!" She suddenly yelled, jumping onto Toshiro's desk so fast, that he had no time to rescue his mountain of paperwork from causing an avalanche, onto the messy floor below. 'I am not a girl! I'm a real...not boy!"
Toshiro grit his teeth angrily. "Is that not an oxymoron?!" He demanded.
The recruit let out a gasp of delight.
"Why thank you, Whitey-chan! That's the nicest thing that anyone has said to me aaaaallll day!"
"What are you talking about?!" He demanded.
Blood Pressure plus three points.
"You called me a moron, of course! Silly Whitey-chan!" The recruit stated.
Toshiro had to now hold his hand back from drawing Hyorinmaru.
"How is that nice?!" He yelled. "I just asked for your name, recruit! So give it to me!!"
"I told you, it's Axel."
"Did you not hear me?!" Toshiro demanded.
"I heard ya, Whitey-chan. I don't got a gender, so I'm Axel." He explained.
Toshiro stared at Axel in disbelief. How could today get any worse?
"Oh! Whitey-chan! I feel reeeeaaaaal bad about the door, so I composed a song for ya!" He explained, before singing the worst, off tune apology 'song', if it could ever be considered that.
That was how.
-------------------------------The Day: One hour to total destruction-------------------------------
Toshiro was sitting at his desk, head on it, as he attempted to think happy thoughts. The 'song' that the imbecile had 'sung' to him had carried down to the halls of eleventh squad, and they were now popping into his office, continuously calling him 'Whitey-chan', and leaving instantaneously, before he could behead them with his Bankai.
Another knock came from the door; Toshiro only moaned to answer it.
Eon stepped in, several papers in her hands, the large recruit that was with the two of them at the ceremony carrying the others.
"Here you go, sir cap-i-tan!" She announced cheerfully as she placed them onto the corner of his desk, the blonde copying her, though how with his eyes closed, Toshiro was not sure.
"Thanks..." Came Toshiro's muffled response, as his face was buried into papers scattered all over his desk.
"Wow, you don't look so good, Cap'n." Eon noted, before snapping her fingers. "Hey, can Hikki and I do anything to help?" She asked hopefully, Toshiro slowly looking up from his nest of papers.
"Well..." He muttered, thinking of simple tasks that he could give to them. "Matsumoto threw a bottle of vodka onto the wall over there," He said, pointing at the corner of the right wall, which was covered in a horrible smelling puddle of alcohol. "Can you clean that up...?" He asked, relieved with the nods for response.
He lightly placed his head back onto his desk. I guess that they're not TOO bad, once they get use to it here... He thought, before he heard their conversation...
"No...I don't think that that is a good idea—" The blonde attempted, but being the silent voice of reason did not help matters, as Eon snapped her fingers, a flame, no bigger than a lighter's, floating above her fingers.
"Bye-bye, Mr. Stinky!" She said, as she blew it onto the wall.
The explosion was instantaneous, and the fire spread all across the wall like the plague.
Toshiro jumped up and drew his Zanpakuto, before using its ability to summon water to put out the flame.
He turned to see the two of them, eyes wide at what the had just done, before the eleventh squad ran in again, singing "whitey-chan" for the final time that day; because that was when Toshiro screamed loudly, unable to take anymore.
----------------------The Day: Destruction complete: Eighth squad office----------------------
"And that was how it all happened..." Toshiro explained, lying across the couch in the eighth squad's office, holding an ice pack over his head.
"I see..." Ise Nanao muttered, writing something down onto a clip board in front of herself. "Quite an ordeal, all for one day, no less..." She muttered, finishing her notes...or at least that was what Toshiro believed them to be...
"What should I do?! I can't go back to something like..like that!" He said, motioning with his arm, only to feel the headache sting more that ever.
'Well, I don't believe that you have to, captain Hitsugaya." She said, pushing her glasses up her nose with her index finger. "We found out that those...delinquents, as you put it, do not belong in the squads that they were assigned to, and we switched for the safety of, not only their selves, but for the rest of Seireitei's sanity as well."
"Ah, I see..." Toshiro, muttered, closing his eyes in thankfully. "Who did the paperwork for them, than?" He asked, without even thinking.
The response was obvious, but Toshiro was not thinking right now, only attempting to relax, and to lower his blood pressure.
"Rangiku Matsumoto, of course." Ise said simply, before leaving the room quickly, and closing the doors behind her.
Toshiro shot up like a rocket as it set in. His response was instantaneous, from the amount of times that he had done so in the past.
"MATSU MOTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
So, what do you think? I'm up at like, eleven writing this, and man am I tired... Please R & R; I'll never get better without something to work with. Also, if there are any ideas for later chapters, please send some to me; you'll get credit.