Author – Vixster
Rating - G
Disclaimer – I don't own any of the characters or the show, or anything at all.
Summary – Janeway's past comes back to haunt her, and Tom gains an old friend.
Authors Note – I wrote this story after a conversation with a friend, about the moments in life when your really depressed, and, also about decisions you make that in hindsight you would have made different.
Chapter One - AloneJaneway sat in her ready room reading an engineering report, when she heard the door chime.
"Enter" she sighed; it had been a long day.
Chakotay walked in, smiling his dimpled smile "Dinner. My quarters?"
"Why not" Janeway smiled.
"19.00"
"I'll be there," she said getting up, as though to leave and then changed her route to the window.
Chakotay wasn't sure whether she meant for him to leave or not. The captain had been acting strangely recently; he decided to ask her about it "A penny for them?"
"Oh. Nothing, I was lost in the past for a minute." She turned round and smiled in an effort to reassure him.
Nodding and striding through the door he made a mental note to talk to her about it again this evening. He walked to his chair and took a seat, before noticing Paris was gazing absently at him. Thinking about it Chakotay realised Paris hadn't been his usual cocky self either since the last data stream from earth. He turned back to the Lieutenant only to see that he had turned away.
The rest of the shift wore on, nothing eventful happening. As soon as shift change came, Janeway practically bolted off the bridge, apparently on her way to engineering.
After talking to Neelix about crew moral, especially Paris and the Captain, Chakotay headed for engineering to catch up with his dinner date. However, when he arrived she was nowhere in sight and according to B'Elanna, hadn't been in engineering since she came to check up on how the repairs to the replicator system were going, yesterday. Chakotay headed back to his quarters confused, and concerned. His anxiety only increased when Janeway failed to show for dinner that evening.
Checking with the computer, he found that she was in her quarters, he tried to call her over the conn, but she didn't answer. He punched his override commands into her door pad frantically, receiving strange looks from passers by.
On entering her quarters, he made out her shape stood at the view port with her back to him. The lights were off. He walked slowly over to her before reaching her and saying her name "Kathryn", she didn't answer for a while. Then he turned her to face him, afraid, remembering the last time he had seen her like this in the void.
Her tearstained face and the photo that she held tightly against her chest tore at his heart.
"What is it?"
"Go, Chakotay. I want to be alone" she turned away again.
"I won't stand back and let you do this to yourself again, Kathryn" he said, sadness eminent in his voice.
"I'll see you on the bridge tomorrow" she whispered, as though to reassure him that she wasn't going to hide away and stop being the captain.
"You know where I am," he said, laying a hand on her shoulder, before leaving.
-Fin-