Quietly

After Shino is born Shibi has to make a decision.

Notes: I just really love the Aburame. And so should you.

Re-written: 12/01/2016

Shibi didn't mourn his wife's passing.

She'd come to him, she'd married him, she'd had his child, and she'd died. They hadn't felt much for each other; a few years was too short a time for any love to grow between them. They'd been two strangers doing their duty, and that duty happened to be together. Shibi held their son, though, and decided that he could make it so he wouldn't need a mother.

"Dad," Muta called, quiet and respectful and so, so scared. Shibi had also heard his sibling-cousins claiming that with a son that really was his own, the Lord Aburame would surely discard the adopted seven-year-old.

Shibi didn't know what to say that could placate the small, thin boy, that could wipe the honest terror from his little features, so instead, he said; "Come hold your little brother," and that seemed to be enough.

Muta was nervous when Shibi put a pillow in his lap, even more so when the baby went on top of it. Though it had nothing on the visible shock Muta had when little Shino blinked and there was an iris and pupils and whites to the eyes under his lids.

"He hasn't got-" A few of Muta's kikaichu beetles skittered across his cheekbone for emphasis, as if reminding the world that Aburame eyes looked very different underneath the lenses.

"He must be five days old," Shibi told Muta, brushing some of the boy's long hair behind his shoulder, off of Shino. Instead of telling Muta that it was to ensure he was a healthy baby, and would survive being a beetle's hive, he went on with; "So he will come to trust us, you see."

Muta nodded, and he looked happier than he had since he was four and crying because his mother has walked out of his life (and Shibi's too).

"What's his name?" Muta whispered, since whispering in a baby's presence seemed appropriate.

Shibi murmured back; "His name is Shino."

"Oh," Muta said agreeably, and his voice was so warm and delighted that Shibi imagined it killing him one day. "Hello Shino! I'm your big brother! My name's Muta, okay? I'm going to look after you a lot, you'll see! I'll walk you to and from the academy when you're big enough, and I'll help you tie your shoes and read you stories!" Muta went on and on like that, excitedly telling Shino all the things they'd do together and all the fun they'd have as shinobi, that soon enough Shibi couldn't bare it and left the room quietly, unnoticed.

The Aburame were a logical clan. They valued control, vital to their symbiosis with the kikaichu, more highly than most anything. A level head. Rational thought. That was what the Aburame embodied.

So when every rational part of Shibi was telling him he should give them both up, he listened. He knew it was true he wouldn't have much time for them. He knew that they would be well-loved and cared for by many of his capable, trustworthy sibling-cousins. Someone who had experience raising children would raise them better than he could. He knew that he could still be close to them. He knew that they could still call him their father.

'At least the baby,' He thought, 'At least give him a better chance at a family.'

What right did a divorced, then widowed man have, raised two children on his own? A leader, maybe, but a father? It just didn't look good. He didn't seem capable of the interpersonal commitment; and Shibi couldn't honestly say that they were wrong. His track record spoke volumes; two half-hearted marriages didn't give him any credit.

Of course, there were still other parts to an Aburame. The person that was more than simply a hive. A person who felt and thought and wanted as everyone else did. Those urges and desires were also to be valued and considered… when appropriate

'They are my children,' He thought again, fiercely, 'They'remine.I love them. I'm their father. They're mine.'

But what did this matter fall under? It was to do with his children, but they were the future of his clan. It was a matter of the heart, but it had to be monitored by the mind. This weighed on not only those two brothers, but with other brothers, other sisters that they would meet and love and call family. This involved their sibling-cousins, who would play with them and teach them and learn from them. This involved when one of them would lead them all. This involved their clan, and maybe that was more important than his desire for their small, broken family.

"Dad!" Muta sounded so panicked that there was a cloud of kikaichū there before Muta could also yell; "He's laughing! Dad I don't know what to do, please!"

The beetles burrowed under his skin, making their way through muscle and flesh, and Shibi chuckled as he took his newborn child from his son.

"Did he frighten you? By laughing?"

Muta didn't look amused at all. "Is he broken? I don't want him to be broken…"

Shibi tried not to laugh again at how sad he sounded. "He's not broken. He's just a baby."

"Oh," Muta realised, and he giggled, the sound turning shrill and loud when Shino made a noise in response.

"Sir?" There were a croud of Muta and Shino's older cousins at the door, the ones in front hissing back to their fellows that nothing had happened and they couldn't see the baby.

"Muta?" Shibi asked his son in turn.

Muta took his prompt wonderfully, and Shibi had never been so sure of something in all his life. These were his sons. They always would be. This time, he would be selfish. This time, he would keep his family.

"His name is Shino, and he's really small. And warm. He laughed just now! So did I," He added shyly. One of Muta's older cousins started crying, and the others teased her. "He's my little brother."

Shibi stood with Shino in his arms and turned to the young men and women at the door that he was sure he would see grow and die and prosper.

"Oh, that's… that's very, good, uhh, that's good and-" The young man who spoke first fumbled at what to say now, and the others laughed at him, but since they could do no better they did nothing.

"Might we hold him? See him? Oh please!" Except one, an eager one who had forgotten (or refused) to do his collar up, and his visible excitement made the gaggle laugh louder.

Shibi nodded and the eager man was taken over by the crying woman and Shino was swept away from him in an eager torrent of loving family who cooed to him and held him carefully. Someone swept Muta up also, and both boys were adored and doted upon. The coddling was so unbecomingly not-Aburame, that when one of Shibi's sibling-cousins came to tell them off, he was almost too amused to tell him that his son has been born.

The man's face showed an understanding then, an understanding that Shibi was confident he'd receive when he informed them all he would be raising both his sons himself. One of the boys was crying now, and was so distracted he didn't notice it was Shibi patting his back. An Aburame baby had been born. It was a celebration of new life; a gift to all of them. A new member of their family.

The Aburame were rational, but they weren't without emotions, and the Aburame Clan would understand a father's need for his children.