Bruce went to his local Starbucks and noticed there was a new employee. "Are you new?" Bruce asked. "Haha yeah, this is my first day!" replied the oozy green dripping gelatinous blob. Bruce asked for the new employee's name. "It's on my nametag, silly goose..! heh! kawaii!" replied the Starbucks worker, apparently named Slimer. Bruce tipped his fedora. "D'ya think I could have your number too?" Slimer screamed "senpai! my number is (617) 750-7171!" Bruce laid his fedora back on his cranium and went home to his average sized apartment. He called Slimer on the phone and set up a date for the next day at his apartment. The next night Bruce spent 3 hours setting up his romantic dinner of mac & cheese and chewable vitamins but then he remembered that his best friends Dick and Alfred lived in his house! He told them to lock their doors so they did. Slimer finally came over. "How do you do, hunny nugget?" Bruce asked Slimer. "hehe! oh senpai!" After a romantic dinner, Bruce made his move on Slimer. When their lips finally met, Bruce had to wipe his chin of the glowing green goo dripping down his face. Bruce rubbed his hands down Slimer's floating torso, covering his hands in oobleck. Slimer licked Bruce's face with his long green tongue. Slimer opened his mouth and bared his plaque-covered teeth. Bruce scratched Slimer's teeth with his toenails, causing Slimer to cry "SeNpAi". Dick walked out of his room to get snacks and saw what they were doing. He watched as Bruce continued to scratch, getting faster now. Finally Bruce's hand started peeling and revealed a bionic skeleton. Slimer gasped, and floated away. Dick realized what was happening. Dick ran into his room and grabbed his Proton Pack. Aiming for Slimer, Dick shoots. Bruce jumps in front of the stream and he gets hurt. "Bruce!" Dick screams. Slimer leans over to Bruce and whispers "Senpai..." in his ear. Bruce, with his dying strength, tips his fedora. "M'lord..." he says. Slimer starts crying, but Dick doesn't care. He aims the Proton Pack at Slimer and shoots. Now that Slimer and Bruce were dead, no one would know that Bruce Wayne died with his parents on Crime Street all those years ago.