A/N: Another quick Tony-centric story. I'm sorry to those who are still eagerly awaiting my return to Masked Betrayal. I'm hoping to get at least one chapter up over my summer holidays which are due to start in a few weeks. Until then, have at this.
"You're not Gibbs, Tony."
Running his hand through his hair, Tony looked back on the previous few days and shook his head. If he could describe the past few days he would use only a few words. Hell. Tiring. Enlightening.
He didn't ask to be made Team Leader; they could blame Pinpin Pula for that. He was quite content to remain as Gibbs' Senior Field Agent, but some things don't go to plan.
As Senior Field Agent, the agent with the most experience amongst them, he had to step up and lead the team. They couldn't just sit around and wait for Gibbs to wake up, they had a crime to solve, and Gibbs definitely would've head slapped all of them if he had woken up with his memory intact only to find that they were waiting for him to give them instructions.
He was just doing his job and he didn't appreciate the fact that his team, albeit a team that he thought he was only temporarily leading, couldn't wait to pick apart the aspects of his leadership that appeared to mirror Gibbs' techniques.
He had never had the chance to develop his own. If he had have had the time to sit down and process the fact that his boss, the almighty Gibbs, was in a coma and he was now team leader, he may have used his own techniques. But he didn't. He didn't get that luxury, so he did what they were all familiar with, what they were comfortable with. That wasn't enough though. Or maybe it was too much. He didn't know. Just like they didn't know what it was like to suddenly have to fill the shoes of his boss; his mentor.
As if it wasn't enough that Ziva, McGee, and Abby weren't impressed with his efforts and had no qualms in making their thoughts on the matter known, he had to deal with the Director's opinion of him. He always knew that she wasn't too fond of him. He couldn't really blame her, he supposed, since the only real sides of him she'd seen was the joking agent and skirt-chaser. Perhaps if she had taken the time though, she would've realised he was actually a capable agent and there was more to him than those two facets.
But instead, he found himself having to "fight" for his right to lead the case so that she could see whether or not he measured up to Gibbs. He doubted he did, but then, as everyone was telling him, he wasn't Gibbs.
He could admit to himself that one of the real blows had been to learn that Gibbs' memory over the past 15 years was potentially gone. His memory of him would be gone. The main reason he stuck at NCIS for longer than two years would more than likely not know who he was. Yes, he could admit that that thought hurt. He couldn't dwell on it though; he had an investigation to run and a terrorist to find. That's not to say it wasn't sitting front and centre in his mind for him to focus on when he found his thoughts wandering.
He really wished he could've skipped that week and resurfaced after it was all over to find everything was back to normal. Unfortunately, he couldn't and it wouldn't be normal ever again. Gibbs called him McGee. Gibbs quit.
Gibbs left him with a, "You'll do".
He wasn't sure which hurt more; Gibbs mixing him up with McGee, him leaving him and the team, or the short and to the point statement made while handing him his gun and badge.
He'll do. He reckoned he could be forgiven for not feeling overly joyful at those last parting words. They had years of history and all he got was a "You'll do".
He would do, though. He wasn't expecting to have to be team leader permanently, but he would adapt and he would run the team the way he wanted. If the others had a problem with the way he lead the team, well, they could like it or lump it.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo stood up from his desk, shouldered his bag, and slowly made his way to the elevator. Tomorrow would be a new day; a new beginning. He would begin to look for a new Probie, one he could train the way he wanted. He would develop his own way of leading the team, a team that probably didn't have much faith in his abilities; they never did. It wasn't personal, he knew that, but it didn't help.
No, he wasn't Gibbs. He was Special Agent DiNozzo and he was a damn fine agent.