I staggered to my room with the almost empty bottle of vodka in my hand, April's third the anniversary of the day everything ended or everything began, depending on your point of view, it had become something like a tradition for me, every year I told myself I was not going to think about it and every year I ended up wasted, it didn't help with the feelings, not at all, although, it somehow numbed the pain, or this is what I wanted to believe.

I sat on the bed and I drained my bottle, I looked at it for a moment, I remembered drinking from a glass, I could not remember how I ended up with the bottle, I let it slip from my hand, watching it roll across the room, I lay down on the bed and I looked at the ceiling that was spinning unmercifully.

I woke up, the alarm clock, by my bed, said I was passed out for two hours, the noises from upstairs had awakened me "for fucks sake" I mumbled with hoarse voice, my throat felt like sandpaper and I had an awful taste on my mouth, I heard another loud noise that made my head pound, sharp and heavy, that was probably Derek, my landlord, intimidating, broody, ridiculously handsome and a werewolf, of course he didn't know I was aware of that, the werewolf part that is, and I liked it that way, I didn't want to explain why I knew about the supernatural world, or how I could tell that he was a werewolf.

Another noise followed, that made my head throb, living on that apartment for 5 years I eventually got used to the disturbance, never asked what was going on at the loft above and Derek never gave an explanation. I pressed a pillow on my head, which was an excellent idea, not only it didn't muffle the noise but it also caused me nausea, I threw the pillow away pressing my eyes with my fingers I lay on the bed, my stomach twisting, my head pounding and my adorable nevertheless landlord doing god knows what upstairs, I wasn't going to complain about it, I never did, I could understand, the werewolf's life was not the easiest life to live, and that was one of the reasons I never asked or complained, another reason was that Derek never asked about me as well, he let me pay the rent in cash, he accepted my fake name, and didn't object when I said I would prefer not to sign a lease, so the least I could do in exchange for his discretion was to pretend everything upstairs was perfectly normal.

The noised above became somewhat disturbing and on my way to the kitchen I wondered if I had to worry, I took an aspirin and drank three full glasses of water with trembling hands, I could hear the blood pumping on my temples, and the noises from above were really, really getting on my nerves. I rested my head in my hands and began to rub my temples, trying to massage away the headache, "Shut. Up." I yelled at the ceiling, and winced from pain, yelling wasn't helping apparently. I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and crawled to my couch, pressing the cold bottle to my eyes.

Derek was an Alpha, I had to cut the guy some slack, he had to take care of a hole pack, and having seen Derek's pack, I knew, they were a handful, constantly getting into troubles, sometimes I felt a pinch of shame, I could have helped with some of the troubles, but then I remembered that they were not my pack, not my troubles. And then I remembered that Derek was not an Alpha anymore, something about that kid being a true Alpha, and then I remembered that Derek was not on Beckon Hills, I gave the rent for the last six months to his sister two days ago, alcohol was really slowing my thinking process, the noises upstairs got louder, maybe Derek came back, or maybe Cora was in danger, I rose, and then I fell back on the couch, no, I thought, Cora could take care of herself, she was tough, I drunk some water and pressed the bottle back on my forehead. The noises from above ceased eventually, I glanced at the ceiling maybe a quick check, just to make sure everything is alright.

I checked my gun as I was climbing up the stairs, the door was open, repeating my mantra for the day, not a good idea, not a good idea, on my head, that was killing me, I slipped inside, I could smell blood, human blood, werewolf blood, and something else, I knew the smell but I couldn't place it. I took small steps, it was dark inside but the dim light coming from the windows was enough for me to see that the loft was trashed, broken furniture, blood and bodies on the floor, barefoot I kept walking, someone was there, someone who was not Cora, man, I thought, human, he was on his knees, searching for something, "pst" I called for his attention, he stood still "look, I have an epic hangover" I said "please don't make me shoot".

A gunshot echoed deep inside my brain sending waves of agonizing pain all over my head, my arm hurt too but the headache was all I could thing at the moment, another man was standing on my left holding a gun with a smoking barrel, I aimed at his knee, I got him mid-thigh, close enough, I fired again, the man hit to the floor, and I shoot him one more time, better safe than sorry, every single gunshot was bouncing inside my scalp making me wince in pain, the first man I had spotted took the advantage and leaped at me with a knife, I shot him right between the eyes, pity, I thought as his lifeless body collapsed on my feet "I had questions" I told him, the good news was that the bullet wound in my arm took my mind off the headache.

I heard a small pop behind me, and felt the pain as soon as an arrow head emerged out of my right shoulder, wonderful, I shot blind twice behind me, as I run to hide behind Derek's upturned sofa, I knew, I had to pull the arrow out, I just couldn't bring myself to do it, I never had a great pain tolerance.

I closed my eyes and grit my teeth, the pain, the memories, it was been seven years since the last time I fired a gun, seven years since the last time I killed, I took a deep breath and pulled the arrow out with one fast move "are you the last one?" I asked him, no answer "like you were going to tell me" two I killed, one still standing and five bodies, eight, I looked around and spotted Cora by the wall on my left, three arrows were poking out of her stomach, I couldn't say if she was alive or not, "are you hunters?" I asked, got two gun shots in respond "a bit antisocial aren't you?" he was walking towards me, he was soundless, I gave him that, but I could totally see his reflection on the window, I crawled on the other side of the sofa, and shoot him twice on the leg and one time on the shoulder. I rushed to him and kicked the gun away "are you a hunter?" I asked again the man growled at me, eyes filled with hatred, i shoot him again on the other shoulder "I asked you a question" he groaned, I put the gun on his head "know what?" I said, "I don't really care" I pulled the trigger.

Cora was breathing "Cora?" I called her name, the left side of her face was bruised and bloody, there were too much blood "come on Cora" she moved slightly "Cora look at me" she mumbled something "Cora? Cora?"

"Jane?" she said weakly, with doubt

"Yeah it's me" I told her "Can you open your eyes?"

"mmhh"

"open them" Cora opened her eyes "I'm going to pull the arrows so you can heal, alright?"

"What?" Cora's voice came out weak, a cry of pain slipped from her lips as I removed the first arrow.

"sorry, I'm sorry" I said throwing the arrows away, I pulled her bloody t-shirt up so I could see the wound "it's not that bad" I shamelessly lied to her

Cora grimaced "what are you doing here?" she asked, her voice just a whisper

"I heard noise and I got worried" well I didn't get worried fast enough, I thought, I really needed to get out of here, all the blood and that smell I could not remember were making me nauseated and the headache came back with vengeance "can you walk?" I asked "I need to take you out of here" Cora nodded

I half drag half carry Cora to my apartment, she was gaining and loosing continence, I helped her on the bed, and I went to the bathroom for my medical supplies, cleaned and bandage Cora's wound first and mine after, and I went to the kitchen I grabbed the pain killers from the kitchen table and took two, it felt like my head was going to explode, Derek I remembered, I had to call Derek. I went back to my bedroom, where Cora was sleeping and grabbed my cellphone from the night stand I glanced at Cora, caught that smell again, that smell I knew. I scrolled down my contacts and found Derek's number I called him, but he didn't answer, I called again, Cora shifted on her sleep and said something I placed a hand on her forehead "shit" she was burning, I called Derek one more time on my way to the bathroom, I searched the cabinet by the mirror for antibiotics and found a bottle, called again as I was trying to open the bottle, the dial tone synchronized with the rhythm of blood throbbing in my temple, I balanced the cellphone with my good shoulder to free my hands in order to open the bottle "fuck" the pills were spilled on the sink, the wound on my shoulder felt like it was on fire, I tried to reach for one of the pills but my fingers were shaking uncontrollably, I looked at my palms there were three burn marks across my right palm and one on my left, with trembling hands, I called Derek again, my stomach was twisting, nausea hit me hard, letting the cellphone fall down, I rushed to the toilet, and threw up.

The smell, I could remembered the smell, the burn marks, the arrows, I vomited again, how could I missed that, the arrows, they were poisoned, how could I missed that, how could I forget that smell somehow I managed to drag myself out of the bathroom and I did another failed attempt to reach Derek "Cora" I tried to yell but my voice wouldn't come out "Cora" I tried again "wake up, you need to wake up" I crawled to the bed and fished the shoe box underneath it "Cora" I pleaded one more time, my shoulder was sending waves of pain to my whole body, "Cora, please" I opened the shoe box and grabbed the vile with the black liquid not enough for both of us "shit" I looked at Cora, tree arrows, it was a miracle she was even breathing, the antidote wasn't enough for both of us, and Cora had been hit by three poisoned arrows, I crawled by Cora's side, and opened the vile with my teeth, my whole body was numb, just lifting my hands was a big effort, with clenched teeth I managed to take the bandage out and spill the black liquid on Cora's wound.

I remembered the vet, he was a Druid, wasn't he?, I've met him on my first year here, when I found a stray dog, old, sickly and skeletal and I took it to him, he was a kind man, calm and collected it was easy to figure out what he was, his office reeked of mountain ash, and every herb I could name, the moment I found his number, the phone slipped from my hands, I picked it up with limp fingers, it was six in the morning, "Hello?" said the vet's voice on my ear, thank god

"Dr. Deaton?"

"Yes, who is it?"

"its ele…" stupid, stupid "jane, it's jane" every word that came out was with big effort "jane miller, I need help" I looked as white steam came out of Cora's wounds, and I breathed, maybe she got a chance, the room was spinning "poisoned, abrus precatorius" I said, praying the vet would understand

"Jane where are you right now?" I could hear a pinch of panic in his voice

"Home" was all I could say, my throat close, every breath seemed to take forever

"I'm coming, are you alone Jane?" I couldn't breathe "Jane?" Deaton's voice called me through the phone "can you hear me?"

"Yes" I managed a whisper

"Try to stay awake" Deaton said but I was drifting away "Jane I'll be there in five minutes"

I don't have five minutes I thought, the phone slipped out of my fingers, how could I be so stupid how could I missed the smell, Cora shifted on the bed, maybe Cora will make it, laying on the floor gulping for air, my mouth dry and biter, every part of my body aching, at least the shaking had stopped, I looked at the ceiling wandering if this is what dying feels like, if that was it, everything was going to end on the anniversary of the day everything ended, there must be something poetic in that, if I could I would laugh, but I was so tired, the room grew darker, that's not right I thought, it's six in the morning the day was breaking, it was not supposed to be dark, I tried to keep my eyes open but it was very hard, so I gave up, I could hear something in the distance, my cellphone I realized, I opened my eyes everything was blurred, the cellphone was ringing right next to my face but I couldn't move my hand to reach it and the room grew dark again.