Disclaimer: I own nothing.

So this is how it's going to end. I never thought…I mean, I knew there would be pain, of course…but I didn't think it would hurt this much.

Oh, I thought the Dark Lord would torture me. I thought my death would coincide with his discovery that I have not been his man. His rage would be terrible, and I would pay. That's what I thought. That's what I prepared myself for. But this…this is worse. Bleeding to death on the ground with James' son beside me.

That's not the painful part…the bleeding, I mean. No, it's knowing that the last thing I see in this world will be the product of your love for another. Not me. James.

I look into his eyes and allow myself to pretend they are yours. That green I used to drown in. The green that darkened when you were angry with me but was as bright as the sun on the grass when you laughed.

I miss that sound. I miss you. You, the only person besides Dumbledore who ever saw past my name, my family, my bravado…my deeds. Why did you both have to leave me? This last year without Dumbledore, without you…I have never been more lonely. It's no pleasant feeling to know that there is not a person alive who cares for you.

I am aware of my memories leaving me, and I mutter for your son to take them. To finally know the truth. To know the sacrifice he must make. The Dark Lord, gone…the final vengeance for your death. I wish we could be alive to see it. I wish I could take you in my arms at that moment and apologize for everything, knowing you would forgive me.

The pain…the pain threatens to render me incomprehensible. The pain of what I did, the part I played in your death. I'll never forgive myself. Never. And to have this reminder in front of me as I take my last breaths is cruel. Oh, Lily….

I must forget that. I cannot let my final thoughts be despairing, though my life was as it was. Your final thoughts were filled with love. Fear, I'm sure, gripped you as well, but love for your son, for…for…your husband…it marked your passage from this world. I must emulate that. It's what you would want from me.

I love you. I love you.

"Look at me," I gasp, desperate to escape into your eyes once more, to rest in their depths.

I'll see you soon.

Please review! I'd love to hear your thoughts!