Let it Rain,
By, SwedishNerd.
Disclaimer: While I own a lot, I (unfortunately) do NOT own Harry Potter. The lucky woman J.K Rowling does. And don't sue, 'cause all I own ain't worth much…
"Let love rain down on me" – Let it Rain by Jojo.
She always did love the rain, so when the first drop fell he knew where to find her. He had searched the castle for her, to no avail. He wanted to apologize, to make amends. He hadn't meant to say those things; the words had just slipped out of his mouth. But she was gone, and he hadn't seen her since breakfast, nobody had. He must've hurt her by saying it, he guessed. Not really having meant to hurt her, promising he never would, he still had. More than anyone he knew.
Perhaps even more than Petunia, whom Lily often spoke about. Even when she told him the horrifying stories of what Petunia did to her, Lily's voice was filled with endearment. It was obvious she truly loved Petunia, despite all the hurt she'd caused her. Now he had hurt her more than her own sister, it seemed. He had never seen her cry over Petunias public hatred towards her, yet all he had to do was say those three crucial words and her eyes flooded. He hurt her more than her own sister had. In some selfish, disgusting way that fact warmed his heart. Not the fact that he had hurt her, but the fact that he meant to much to her that he could hurt her that much. After all, isn't it those closest to us that hold the power to hurt us the most? That, upon opening your heart for someone, you're also opening for hurt. And the closer someone is, the greater power of hurting you they get.
It was amusing, though; that the words so many women wanted to hear was the words that had possibly driven Lily away from him. Just remembering the tears in her emerald eyes almost got him crying. They were almond shaped and upon hearing his three words, filled to the brim with tears. Crystal sparkling tears. Her pupils searched his face until they, reluctantly, met his eyes. Her mouth had opened and closed like a freshwater fish before she ran off, the sound of her footfalls echoing through the suddenly chilly hall.
He asked literally everyone he saw after that; but no one had seen her. He searched her dorm, his dorm, the kitchen and every empty and full classroom he stumbled upon. Lots of people but no Lily. He earned himself several detentions from disrupting classes, still he found no Lily. He got yelled at by Madame Pince when he, for the unkempt time, came in to search the library for her. She was not in the prefects' bathroom, nor in the Great Hall or at Hagrid's.
He hadn't even thought of searching the grounds, Lily always said they made her nervous while alone outside. And the weather wasn't nice either, so he didn't think she would be outside. Not until he saw a raindrop raced another down his window. She always did love the rain, and somehow he just knew exactly where he would find her.
And there she was, beneath their favorite tree along the shore of the great lake. She hadn't on a shirt, and if he knew her right; not a heating charm either. Whenever he caught her undressed in the rain he would always insist on her taking his cloak, or allowing him to put a heath charm on her. Until she told him her musings about the rain…
She liked the way it felt on her skin, the lukewarm drops making their way down her body. Watering her hair, soaking her cloths and falling in her eyes: making her sight blur. Still, she could make out the silhouettes of the sunset before her. The sun was setting behind the castle this time a year, and the way the light broke on the grandiose castle turned it into a fairytale picture. Hogwarts had always been more or less breathtaking, but now, with the mountains towering in distance, and the way the rain reflected the sun, now it was almost hurting to look at it, it was just too beautiful. Too beautiful to be true, too good to be true; what's the difference?
Maybe it just wasn't the sight before her. Everything smelled differently in the rain. Just as freshly washed sheets smelled better, nature smelled better during rain. After as well, but it was more prominent while it was raining. Rain was cleansing for the planet, she had always thought. The skies never looked as good as it did after a good rain. Not a storm, but a moderately rainfall. It was as new washed dish, shining and appealing. Maybe rain was someone's way of cleaning the planet. Lily wasn't sure if she believed in a God, but if there was someone, or something, almighty as him, it would defiantly be his way of cleaning the planet. Perhaps it was mode nature's doing. Yes, yes it probably is, she concluded.
She hadn't moved in hours, and the cramps in her legs turned out to be a useful distraction of James' hurtful words. How come she had pined for him to say that for weeks, and now he had she wished he hadn't? Why did they hurt more than anything Petunia had ever said? Or, maybe, it was not hurt, but fear she was feeling. She couldn't possibly tell them apart, both words rang with the same meaning in her ears. Anyhow, her reaction couldn't possibly be normal, she couldn't be normal. She shouldn't be scared, but rejoicing.
"Hey."
She knew he'd find her; one could only hide from a marauder for so long, even with the spell that kept her hidden from his map. He had an uncanny ability of finding her whenever he wanted to, Marauders map or not. She knew it, also seeming to just feel where he was when she wanted to find him.
"Hey." Raindrops flowed into her mouth when she spoke. Maybe it needed cleansing to, she'd sworn a lot lately so it could be a good thing.
"I'm sorry."
She hadn't turned to face him before, preferring the comforting feeling of knowing he was there but not needing to see him see her all shook up. His presence always seemed to pop at her; she could always feel when he entered a room so she had known he stood there long before he spoke. Had felt him looking at her during her rain-philosophy, as he so neatly called it. She thought it was more of a random-thoughtless-though thing, but he said never to question a Marauder when she voiced her opinion.
But now she turned, unable to stop in her surprise. She had run out on him and he was apologizing? He truly was one of a kind, she realized, as a warm feeling spread in her stomach.
"Don't be. It's my fault. I'm the one who's sorry."
She wasn't pretty. Her hair was damp and plastered to her face, not a trace of the usual volume and curls. Her nose was red from the cold and her eyes swollen from crying. She squinted to see through the rain, and stop as many raindrops from getting inside her eyes as possible, so she looked quite funny.
No, she was not beautiful at all. Yet, in his eyes, she was the most beautiful, divine thing alive. She knew she was not a goddess, but with his eyes on her, how could she not feel as one? He looked at her with stars in the eyes, and filled her with confident. She was beautiful when he looked at her, no matter how foul she knew she looked, she was a goddess.
"No, Lily I. It was too soon, I shouldn't have said that and I'm sorry."
"It's not that, I'm just scared. I, it is all so new to me. I just don't know what to think, what to feel, how to react. Everything seems to come from all angles nowadays, and I really wish I didn't love you so, then I wouldn't have to worry about the deatheaters catching you. But I do, and I worry about you more than I worry for myself. It scares me to no end."
"Lily, I'm scared to. This is new for me as well. You are the last thing on my mind when I go to sleep and the first thought when I wake up, it freaking me out. Not that I'm thinking about you – I would be content with thinking about you forever – but the fact that it is humanly possible to care this much, feel so strongly, for someone else. I care more for you that I care for myself, and I was an only child. I'm very spoilt and have rarely valued anyone this much more than myself, as I was raised to believe I was the greatest human being."
He spoke frowning with a confused, hesitant and scared voice; so it wasn't as cheesy as one would have thought. Or maybe she was too blindly in love to see the cheesiness? Either way, she knew when he spoke, that she would have lain down her life for him. And that was what scared her so much. She had never believed in finding true love, not at her age. Seventeen seemed too young for any feeling remotely as strong as hers, nevertheless she felt them. It was crazy, though, to be as much in love at seventeen, to know that you would want to spend the rest of eternity with the other person. To know that you would be lost without him, or knowing that you would sacrifice your own life for him before you had time to blink, nonetheless think it through.
"I love you."
"I love you, too."
They didn't kiss, but the hug they shared was more intimate than anything they'd done. And they'd done it all. Lily tried to pour her heart, soul and feeling into the hug, and she felt as though he did the same. It was almost painful, even though they didn't squeeze hard, but the emotional impact would have the force to knock down a smaller thestral, she was sure.
It rained love, he concluded. While he stood hugging Lily in the pouring rain he could not think of a better resemblance to rain than love. Rain was crucial for so many reasons. It was not only cleansing, as Lily believed, but it fed animals, and the greenery would be forever doomed if it stopped raining. It was love in touchable form, it was. Rain made the world go around. Rain was a part of the circle of life. Rain was love. So there he stood, Lily in his arms, letting love rain down upon him. He hoped it bode well for their future, that they let love nourish them. If he felt this strongly for Lily, he was sure it was. He would give his life for her, any day. Perhaps more people should stand about in the rain, he couldn't even feel the cold anymore, it was all so warm. It was all Lily in his arms, and pouring love.
An: Reviews are the internet form of love!
I got this idea while I shared my thoughts on rain with the wonderful author Gurkblomma, so by indirect means, this is all her take, kudos to you girl! I guess it's only fair I dedicate this to her, as well! ;)