Tekka was an exhaustively remote planet. The gravity and atmosphere were somewhat humid and something about the air made it seem hefty and exhausting just to trek around in. It was no Jakku - no junkyard. In fact, the only thing left for anyone's eyes on the horizon were beautifully lush greenery along shores and golden sands. Mountains miles above the distant caves and grassy tracks knifed up high; at close distance, it was a neck-strain just to sight the peaks amidst the cluster of clouds. The sky was bright tinted alloy orange: at dawn and dusk, bittersweet shimmer. The luxury hid no secrets from what the eye could capture. Beautiful creatures shared the glittering waters and land alike, along with the vast variety of nutritious fruits, seeds and plants. Everything was at peace. A balance.
It was here the rebellion rebuilt much of what they lost through the salt and fire in the stars on Crait. Not fully nor entirely fundamentally - but it was a clean start. Reassurance maintained and most significantly: hope and balance. Nothing disturbing or no doubts to disrupt the force.
Even so, that never allowed Rey to stray from the idea of never leaving their guide to tremble. Through days of warmth and mugginess, followed by nights of minty mist and captivating sunsets; they fought, lifted, bellowed, meditated and built. All in good nature. Though, all in reason, fearing one day she may again face the ruthless, potentially more powerful Kylo Ren.
It was a long evening for Finn. He crowed in tire and stress, disallowing himself to be defeated nor ungrateful for the offer of support - but the combination only served for disheartening honesty he was willing to face for himself. This was not working out, certainly the way he had planned or intended when the idea first sparked to try out. Even still, it was no surprise to hear Rey's continued, full-hearted encouragement.
"I can't do this, Rey!" Finn chunters. Shutting off his light-saber and tossing it to the grass, he slumps down on a mighty rock. Softening her eyes in sympathy, Rey approaches cautiously when he buries his head into his sweaty palms in vexation. "May I?" Finn vaguely gestures to the space by him. She sits; encouraging him to peel the fingers away from his eyes with a light smile.
"You'll get there." She comments. "I know it's difficult."
"Rey – you're a Jedi. I was a Stormtrooper. If there's anything I'm good at, it's… Using blasters and running away." He holds his breath, shaking his head in misery as Rey frowns in both disagreement and confusion.
"I thought I wanted to learn… Break away from the only combat I was raised to do, but this isn't going the way I thought it would be. How it should be. I'm sorry, Rey. You're wasting your time when you could be training someone better." Finn sighs. It's a mixture of self-annoyance and pity that often tends to build up and drag down his esteem. He knew he was important – how capable he was. Hitting the mark to the best of his ability was something he was continuously praised for as a trooper. Here, he needn't have to succeed, hit a target, take out as much as he can without a surrounding of love and friendship regardless.
But I want to do better than this. He aggressively tells himself.
Inhaling sharply, Rey places her fingers on top of his and webs them together. Nothing short of a soft grin apparent when his tired eyes look up to meet hers. "So full of self-doubt…" She observes. For a moment, Finn's lips silently mumble her statement, almost in reflection. His brow arches.
"Huh?"
A small laugh leaves her lips. "I don't understand how you barely see it, Finn. What you do for us is… Incredible." He scoffs, and she responds only with a stern glare. Rey bites her lip, "look up."
"What?"
"Just do it. Watch the stars with me." Finn complies. Their eyes hit the shimmered, violet painted sky. Dusk was approaching and apart from a gentle breeze hitting the leaves and the grass, the only sound reinforced was their soft breathing. Small flashes of comets and travelling light pooling in various dots that takes them away for a moment.
"It's not about who we are, what our place is and what we should do, Finn. It's about the choices we make and what they impact around us. Neither of us are perfect."
"Sure, but," Finn stutters. He turns to eye Rey and her tender expression before groaning to stand and detach their linked fingers. "It's still so hard to see. What our destiny is. I'm still not sure if I belong…" His words long as far as his eyesight could reach into the stars. The troubles, frustrations and everything on his mind, he used to cast aside in simple ignorance. Now they weighed down his shoulders like a burden of blinding inconvenience. In many ways, Rey could have sworn she'd felt it stack up against him.
The Jedi takes a step; he feels her hand gently press onto his right shoulder and she feels his build tense ever so slightly. "The greatest lesson anyone ever told me was 'the belonging you seek is not behind you. It is ahead.' Letting go of my parents is one of the best choices I ever made. They let me down. But here, everyone, the Resistance… You. They all fill that space. There isn't an ounce of the First Order in you, Finn –"
"It's not about that, Rey." He lightly protests, not breaking his gaze away from the narrow path his pupils focus on. "I don't know what my place is. I don't understand it." Rey thought vaguely at the implications his feelings potentially head towards. Though vague, she couldn't help but quiver with a pinch of concern. What if he'd changed his mind?
"You don't have to… Stay you know." She bites her lip, refusing to sound so sceptically selfish within her own mind at the considerations she'd managed to muster up. "If that's what you're worrying about. You can leave. If you want to." In that, there's a soft break in the whisper of her tone. A mind sadness tinted along, like the features that shift on her face. It's almost like a deja vu of his first choice of departure to the outer rim on Takodana. "I respect your choice."
To that he turns; astonished and puzzled in her misinterpretation. "What?" He sighs and lands back to the rock, pulling her closely to him. No hesitation upholds when she sinks her chin onto his shoulder. "Rey, I know I belong here. I chose the Resistance – I never wanna leave! I love being here. I love everyone here. Poe, Rose, BB-8… Everyone. You." A short chuckle follows in response to her miserable kind of slump. Finn leans in to press a small kiss on her temple.
"I don't think I'd ever feel the same if you left…" The Jedi mumbles jadedly. Finn smirks – pulling her in. "Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere." The hero promises in sincerity. Rey tilts her head from chin to cheek, both dorkily and sweetly. A smile sketches up her lips while she rests comfortably on his shoulder. "Besides, you left first." He continues. She scowls, "hey! I wouldn't if I didn't have to." Finn takes the jest and settles with it. They mirror a smile - something they've grown used to by now.
In seconds of silence, the hero feels her murmur his name against him. Always replaying the way his name sounds from her lips – it was harmonizing. "It's okay, you know." Rey breaks her head away from the crook of Finn's neck.
"What is?"
"You and Rose." She purrs meekly. "I get it, I really do. I mean… I shouldn't. It's not my place. But I can't help but sense how you feel when you're around her. It's so strong. She's the same way. I don't want to be invasive, I try not to, believe me. But I can't help but notice how eased you are when you talk to her, then how tense you become when I approach." Rey mumbles. "You should follow your instincts… Tell her how you feel." Her eyes hold both sadness, though wholehearted honesty. Her ribcage aches and heart slopes down her chest but it's for the best, is what she confirms. "It's okay." She repeats.
Finn only splutters while his chocolate orbs widen a little. He rapidly shakes his head; relaxing his shoulders; an uneasy laugh awkwardly escapes. Rey just sinks a little.
"Rey, Rey. What are you…?" The hero blinks long and softly – unable to contain a slight smirk crawling up his mouth. "Rose saved my life. I love her. Like a sister."
"Finn – Are you –"
"I'm serious, Rey." His tone grows sterner and his stare lingers on the impeccably thin layer of sweat on her skin. Finn leans closer into the eyes that draw him in. "I'm not erasing her. She's like the sister I never knew I had. She knows that. With you? I – I can't really describe what I feel…"
"Yeah, well… You and me both." Rey muses, breathless. She feels the thickness of his breath tickle again the hairs of her neck. It's translates to a feeling that pools and ribbons in her abdomen all the way down to… Her breath is held.
It holds all the whole longer when she captures a glimpse of his sharp jawline, reflecting the hot light of three fading suns.
Simultaneously, they seem to grasp back to reality when one of them clears their throat. It's even unclear to them who. They drift and shift apart slowly – hoping any awkward and unwanted tension is unapparent. They remain quiet and unmoved for the next few moments, although it doesn't feel heavy or tricky.
"Hey, Rey?" Finn looks back, with a smooth voice.
"Yeah?"
"You think I could be a Jedi?" Her smile considers especially. Rey discards the jokingly take he took on the question and carefully wonders. There's no doubt.
"Finn. We defeated Ren – twice. We brought the First Order to its knees. We rebuilt the Resistance and have allies across the whole galaxy. I think either of us could be whatever we want to be. I guess we just need to keep looking up. And forward." Fin titters, finally believing her comments.
"Well, I suppose you're probably right. Mistress Rey." He winks. Rey side-eyes. "Don't call me that, it sounds awful. Besides… We aren't going by the Sacred Jedi Text no more, Mr. Big Deal." She fires back that leads to a shared laughter.
"I meant what I said, you know." She clarifies, schooling her expression. "I know you do. But I mean what I said too. I said I can't describe it, but… I think about you. A lot, Rey. In maintenance, training, flying. Before I sleep, when I wake up and it doesn't stop. Weird thing is, I don't want it to stop." With no further words, he takes hold her left hand and places it on his cheek. The Jedi's lips part as her own cheeks flush. She says his name again – every grain of need and tremble spilling out at the feel of his heated skin.
Their lips meet. It's delicately slow at first. Then loose, sloppy and breathless. Only breaking apart to inhale a gasp of air. They moan as his fingers slide around her waist and nails scratch carefully at the exposed flesh. "Even if we are no ones." Rey quickly, awkwardly pants out when Finn dips his head to kiss along her collar bone and use his tongue down her cleavage. She groans – screwing her eyes and gritting her teeth; using her free hands to curl around his neck and roam his chest and abs. "We're still heroes." They groan.
"We can be the heroes no one knows about." Finn finishes, before landing his lips back onto her mouth and pouring his soul out. It's like a golden touch. A ridiculous desire that amplifies a rippling fire in his chest and an intense jolt of force within Rey. A force in which they both share. "Come on…" Rey pulls away from his lips. "If we're doing this," she manages to wheeze out between breaths and the bubbling sensation towards her south,
"let's go somewhere better."
Author's Note: There's a lack of Finn/Rey fics around TLJ atm, I feel, so hopefully more is to come. I really hope we get some kind of exchange like this in IX (probably not this deep lmao) but even if it's not direct, it would be really cool to see them trying to convey their emotions. I still feel what they have is more than platonic. I also wanted to include dialogue of the lovely Rose in here somewhere. Anyways... I hope you enjoyed this. Thank you for reading and I'd appreciate any feedback.
