A Name is Most Important

by: sonofon

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"A name is very important," she was saying to a clearly uncaring redhead. She smacked him hard on the back. "And are you listening to me?"

"Yeah, sure. Keep going." Let her mouth run off on its own. Hikaru was getting tired. "Besides, isn't it kind of late?"

"It's never too late to think of a name. Hikaru, just pick a name, and we'll be done!"

"But I don't feel like it," he languidly replied, cupping his chin in the palm of his hand. "It's late. I want to go to sleep."

"You're a kid, Hikaru," she mused. "A child, really."

"And what are you – a squirming baby?" If he wanted to, Hikaru could be quite sarcastic, but it was wasted on Renge. She latched herself on him, and shoved a book under his nose.

"Pick."

"You think I can read with a book in my nose?"

He snatched the booklet from her, and neat rows of names with their meanings greeted him. He flipped through the A section. He hated A names.

"The kid isn't gonna have a name starting with A."

"What?" Renge cried. "I love A names! Like Akemi! A bright beauty!" She peered at him anxiously, but he only shook his head. "No?"

"How about Amaya? Night rain? It's such a mysterious and romantic name, don't you think?"

"Like hell no. No kid of mine is going to have a name like Amaya. Ever."

"Then, Mr. I hate names beginning with A, which name do you like?"

Hikaru looked thoughtful for a moment, turning over the pages. "Jin is nice."

"Jin?" Renge screeched. "Gold? Hikaru, you're being a moneywhore. I might as well have married Kyouya."

Looking annoyed, Hikaru retorted, "You're the one who asked. What's wrong with Jin anyway?"

"Too short," Renge deadpanned, as if a short name cursed a girl for life. "And it isn't cute."

"It's cute!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Then screw this!" Hikaru shouted. "I'm sick and tired playing this game with you! We can't agree shit for anything, let alone a stupid name."

"Because the name is the most important thing," Renge responded calmly. "How horrible would we be if we gave a child the most despicable name there was?"

"Like Renge?" he sneered.

She looked sad. "That's dirty, Hikaru-kun," she said, adding the suffix at the last moment. "You know I'd never do that to you."

"Whatever," he said, "I just don't understand why–"

"I told you already."

"–we're doing this when we don't even have a kid yet," Hikaru finished with a roll of his eyes. "Hell, you're not even pregnant."

A/N: Crack. Part 1 of 3. Read and Review!