So, it's finally here. First chapter of the second string of stories. Hopefully this one will be better than the other. Read, enjoy and review, if you feel like it.
Note that just about everything (I mean it) in these stories is connected, and it's all leading up to the final story. Every story should be about two or three chapters long.
Kyle had been struggling with himself lately. For the past two years, things had started to change. His feelings had started to change. First it was just a few "weird" dreams, but it soon turned to conscious thoughts and efforts to spend some time (preferably alone) with one of his friends – Kenny. For a very long time, he didn't even think it was anything other than a deep feeling of friendship, but after a year of feeling this way (and a lot of "weird" dreams), it finally hit him. His first reaction was to hide it, and he was able to do so for a long time, but now he was having second thoughts about that decision.
However, he still couldn't decide whether to tell Kenny about his feelings or even if his feelings were genuine and normal. Did he really like Kenny? Or did he just think that Kenny was cute? Was it normal that he thought boys were cute in the first place? Was there something wrong with him? What would happen if he told Kenny? What would happen if he didn't? What would happen if he told someone else?
All these questions and their possible answers were screaming inside his head almost all the time, sometimes even in his own dreams. He thought that this would eventually drive him insane, but he was finally learning how to make it stop. It wasn't a perfect solution, but it enabled him to think properly.
Despite his effort to stop the screams in his head, there were still noticeable effects when he was around Kenny. His speech was either slowed or he had to repeat himself because he mispronounced his words (similar to the way Jimmy repeated himself, although not as prominent), and he stuttered a lot, but nobody ever called him on it, although everyone was thinking about it.
Because everyone noticed it, everyone tried to understand the reason behind these strange events. There were three major theories: Stan, having spent enough time with Kyle that he could almost consider him the brother he never had (although his mother was now pregnant with an "actual" brother), knew that Kyle had feelings for Kenny, although he kept it to himself. Most of the other boys, however, just assumed that Kyle and Kenny had had some sort of argument and that Kyle didn't want to forgive and forget. The rest of them didn't care at all. They thought that if Kyle had some sort of problem with Kenny, he would talk about it if he wanted to.
Ike was part of that last group. He was completely oblivious to Kyle's feelings, but he still thought that there was something wrong and wanted to help. Unfortunately, Kyle wasn't making it easy.
Ike: Why won't you just tell me what's wrong?
Kyle: Nothing's wrong. Just leave me alone.
Ike: Right, that's why you're kicking me out.
"Ike, just get the fuck out of my room!"
Kyle: No, Ike, I'm kicking you out because it's late and I need to sleep. Leave me alone.
Ike wasn't ready to give up, but Kyle's stubborn refusal to talk to him was really pissing him off. He decided that the best thing to do right now was nothing, both as a way to get Kyle to talk to him and to try to get back at him in a small way.
Ike: ...Fine. But sooner or later, this is going to mess you up in so many ways that you'll have no choice but to tell me.
Kyle: Maybe. Maybe not. We'll just have to wait and see.
With that, Kyle lied down on his bed, with his back turned to Ike, and the latter left, convinced that there was, in fact, something wrong with Kyle. He was glad to have confirmed this, but he was also sad, knowing that there were too many uncertainties, the most important of which being the fact that he might not be able to help Kyle unless he opened up to him... and he knew that that was a very long shot.
Kyle was still awake almost a full hour later, still wondering if he should tell Kenny about his feelings or not. He had completely ignored the argument with Ike, since he thought that he had everything under control. He was just having second thoughts, which was completely normal.
"What's the worst that could happen? I mean, it's Kenny..."
Kyle figured that Kenny would either ignore it or share his feelings, although the latter was highly unlikely. Either way, it didn't really matter. Kenny had always been honest with him about everything. They had shared their best and worst memories with each other. They had literally cried on each other's shoulders. In fact, that was probably why Kyle liked him so much. Kenny was very understanding of everyone's problems and he wasn't afraid to share his own feelings. Unbeknownst to Kyle, however, Kenny only shared his feelings with the person he trusted the most – Kyle himself. Kenny knew that their friendship had developed into something more. It was different than his friendship with anyone else, deeper. More meaningful. However, he couldn't put his finger on why it was different. This was Kenny's Achilles' heel – he was oblivious to other people's feelings (unless they were clearly stated) and, sometimes, even his own.
Although Stan almost considered Kyle the brother he never had, they hadn't been spending much time together ever since he started dating Bebe. He knew that Stan was dating Bebe to make Wendy jealous (which was working, although instead of getting Wendy to admit her feelings for him it just made the two of them angrier at each other), but Bebe was oblivious to this. Of course, Stan wasn't just using Bebe. He did like her, but that wasn't the only reason why he was dating her. Although Kyle thought that this was very childish, not to mention wrong, he didn't say anything about it.
With his mind temporarily distracted from Kenny, Kyle was finally able to fall asleep.
Like almost every night, Kyle woke up after a dream involving Kenny. He didn't want to think about the dream, due to its nature, but he couldn't stop himself from thinking about Kenny. It was the one thing that he couldn't stop thinking about for more than a few minutes, unless he was at school or working on an important project. However, since he had to take breaks every once in a while from both, his mind always drifted back to Kenny. Sometimes he didn't even notice it, he just realized that he was, once again, thinking about Kenny.
Not every thought about Kenny was pleasant, though. Kyle had always been a very negative person, although he tried his best not to be. Last night's realistic ideas about what Kenny's reaction might be melted away and gave way for unfounded fears. He was starting to think that maybe it was better to just keep it to himself, as he had done for the past year. No need to fix what isn't broken in the first place.
Sheila: Kyle! Breakfast!
"Shit, mom... It's too early... I'm tired..."
Sheila: Kyle! Are you awake yet?
"How could I not be?"
Kyle: Yeah, mom! I'll be right down!
After Kyle ate his breakfast and went to the bus stop, he was faced with Stan, Bebe, Cartman and Ike. Stan and Bebe were making out (which made Kyle a bit jealous and angry), while Ike and Cartman were arguing about which new movie was the best. They tried to drag Kyle into it, but he just told them that both movies were very good, although that didn't really solve anything. They kept on arguing during the bus trip and even after arriving at the school. Kyle just rolled his eyes all the way and sighed heavily every time he looked at Kenny. When he looked at Kenny, all that he could think about was that he was lying to him by not telling him his feelings, and it was messing him up, just like Ike said it would.
Kenny: Hey, Kyle. What's wrong?
"Don't sneak up on me like that..."
Kyle: I-I, uh... It's... I-I mean, n-nothing's wrong.
Kenny: Are you sure? You look kinda sad to me...
"Tell him now... He deserves to know..."
Kenny waited for an answer from Kyle, but the latter was so busy psyching himself up that he didn't even notice how long he had been standing there without saying anything.
Kenny: ...Well, it's probably just my imagination. I'll leave you a-
Kyle: N-No, wait! I... I do have s-something to tell you.
Kenny: What is it?
Kyle looked around, but once he realized that there were too many people around, he grabbed Kenny's arm and dragged him to an empty area. Kenny was confused, although he didn't mind at all. Once they got there, Kyle turned his back to Kenny and felt his heart pound in his chest. He wanted to say what he felt, but he was just too nervous to do it. However, in his mind, it was now or never.
Kenny: ...Well? What is it?
"Now I'm curious."
Kyle: W-Well, y-you know how... I-I mean, we've...
"God dammit, Kyle, either say it or don't."
Once he turned around, Kyle could see that Kenny was getting impatient. He needed an answer, and fast. Kyle breathed deeply and finally just blurted it out.
Kyle: Kenny, I like you.
Kenny: I know.
Kyle: W-What?
Kenny: I like you too.
Kyle: R-Really?
Kenny: Of course. Why wouldn't I? We've been friends for as long as I can remember. Why wouldn't I like you? I like Stan too... and Cartman, I guess...
"For fuck's sake, Kenny..."
Kenny had completely misunderstood what Kyle meant. The red-haired boy's cheeks turned bright red from embarrassment, although Kenny interpreted it as anger. Of course, Kyle wasn't angry at all. He was surprised that Kenny didn't understand what he meant and embarrassed that he might have to repeat himself so that Kenny would finally understand what he meant, but before he could summon the courage to do it, the bell rang, much to Kenny's relief.
"Saved by the bell."
Kenny: I gotta get to class now... We gotta get to class. Come on.
This time, Kenny grabbed Kyle's arm and dragged him for a bit until Kyle broke free, which made Kenny even sadder and completely convinced that Kyle was angry at him.
After school, Kyle went straight home, with Kenny following him from afar. He wanted to apologize, but he didn't know what to say, or even what it was that he had done.
"Hey, Kyle. I wanted to apologize for what I did, although I don't know what it is. Will you please forgive me? 'Kay, thanks... Yup, sounds completely honest."
He ran as quickly as he could into Kyle's house and was greeted by Ike, although he didn't pay much attention to him or his questions. He ran upstairs straight for Kyle's room, with his heart pounding in his chest. Kenny thought that he was just nervous because Kyle was angry at him, but that wasn't it. There was another reason. Something he couldn't quite grasp, although he was starting to put the pieces together.
Once Kyle noticed that Kenny was standing in the doorway, his eyes widened, his mouth went dry and his hands started shaking. The boys stood there looking at each other (with Ike looking at Kenny, trying to understand what was going on, although he didn't see him) until Kyle cleared his throat and invited him in.
Kyle: H-Hey, Kenny. C-Come in.
Much to Ike's frustration, Kenny walked inside and closed the door behind him.
"What are they doing up there?"
Ike thought about approaching the door so he could hear the boys' conversation, but he decided not to. Kyle was going to have to take care of this problem on his own.
Kyle: S-So, uh... W-What- I-I mean, why are you h-here?
Kenny: Well, you didn't really give me any other choice. You just...
Kyle took off his hat while Kenny was talking, which sent a surge of memories through his brain and incapacitated him, temporarily. He felt that he could almost grasp what it was that made his friendship with Kyle different than all others.
Kyle: ...Y-Yeah?
Kenny: S-Sorry, i-it's just that...
"Why am I stuttering? Why do I feel so nervous?"
The boys just stood there without saying anything to each other. They were just staring at the floor, with occasional glances at the walls and ceiling. Kenny was trying to figure out what was wrong with him, while Kyle was struggling against the screams inside his head. Part of him wanted to tell Kenny about his feelings, while the other part just wanted to run away and hide or tell Kenny to go away.
Without even realizing it, they had been drifting towards each other, to the point that their chests were just millimeters from each other. Kenny was the first to notice this, but he couldn't move one way or the other. When Kyle also noticed the proximity between them, he froze and felt like he was suffocating. No matter how much air he inhaled or how often he breathed, he just didn't seem to get enough air in his lungs.
Kenny slowly placed a shaky hand on Kyle's cheek and stroked it, which turned both their faces bright red and made Kyle's breathing worse. Kenny put his forehead against Kyle's, and the boys stayed that way for a long time, enjoying the strange feelings they got from it. After about five minutes, Kyle quickly (and gently) grabbed Kenny's head and pressed their lips together for a fraction of a second before pushing the latter away. He quickly turned around, ran onto his bed and pressed his head against the pillow while sobbing.
Kenny was extremely confused, since he had no idea why Kyle did what he did and was reacting this way to it. He slowly approached Kyle and gently placed one arm around him, which earned him yet another lightning-fast reaction from the red-haired boy, although this time, it was just a hug, followed by more sobbing.
Kenny: ...What's wrong, Kyle? I... I w- I mean, I thought you wanted...
Kyle: ...Why are you s-still here?
Kenny: D-Do you want me to leave?
Kyle: No!
Ike heard Kyle's scream from downstairs and once again had to fight the urge to spy on them. However, his curiosity was growing by the second.
Kyle: N-No... Don't go. Don't leave me alone... Please.
Kenny: I won't, Kyle...
"You're my best friend. I would never leave you... I can't leave you."
After Kyle finally stopped sobbing, he released Kenny and sat up straight, although he still remained as close to Kenny as possible.
Kyle: ...W-What are you going t-to do now?
Kenny got up and knelt in front of Kyle while placing his hands on the latter's cheeks and gently wiping his tears with his thumbs.
Kenny: Now I'm going home. Karen must be worried about me.
Kyle: N-No, I mean... What about... t-this?
Kenny: Well, for starters, you're gonna stop crying, because I'm not gonna keep wiping your tears... and because you have nothing to cry about.
Kyle: ...I don't?
Kenny: ...I'm so sorry I didn't understand what you meant this morning. I know that must not have been easy for you.
Kyle: B-bu-
Kenny placed his index finger on Kyle's lips and smiled, which prompted the smaller boy to smile nervously.
Kenny: It's OK. We'll talk tomorrow after school, alright?
Kyle: Y-Yeah, sure...
Kenny: I'll see you later, Kyle.
Kyle: ...S-Sure.
Kenny left, closing the bedroom door behind him, without saying another word and, despite Ike's best efforts, he didn't even talk to him.
Kyle was very confused – Did Kenny share his feelings? Or was that his way of saying "Sorry, but this just isn't going to work out"? Did he do something wrong? With too many uncertainties, Kyle snapped and started crying again, even though Kenny's voice was also echoing inside his head, telling him not to. He pressed his face as hard as he could against the pillow and just let his tears flow straight into the pillow.
Eventually, he passed out from mental exhaustion, while Kenny was still on his way home.
So, that's the first chapter. Sorry for the delay (you have no idea how many iterations this chapter went through). The second (and last) chapter will be uploaded soon (10 days max).
