Mean Girls

Almost Too Cute to Function

Chapter 1: Introduction

She was back on track.

Ever since her life had come crumbling down as a result of the big "Burn Book Mess", as everyone at the school liked to call it, Cady had forever known that she was going to make her life take a turn for the better, even if she had to force it to. She had thrown out all of the "baby-prostitute" perfume, the over-glam lip gloss, and the ridiculous pictures that she, Gretchen, Karen, and Regina had taken together when they used to be plastic Barbie dolls manufactured to make everyone else regret being born. She threw all of these "memories" (as Regina's mom called them) into the garbage except one: a picture that had always been, and would forever be a piece of her heart; a piece that could never be broken off by stupid mistakes and awesome shooters. Cady walked over to her vanity and pulled open the wooden drawer (with an elephant for the handle). She was disgusted at the fact that she could still smell the alcohol from the party sinking into the wood. Shoving the alcoholic smell aside, she pulled out a picture of Aaron Samuels. As she pressed the picture against her chest with passion, she could feel her heartbeat accelerate. She flipped the picture over:

Cady,

Thanks for sharing a wonderful year with me. You have taught me a lot. Stay away from the plastics, and work on your math.

With Luv,

Aaron

Cady's heart melted as she read the beautiful note that Aaron had written for her on the back of his picture even though she had read it about seventy times now.

"I love you Aaron Samuels", she said to herself. She knew that repeating that over and over again would not bring him back to her, but she couldn't help it. It just kept coming up like word vomit.

Cady smiled at the autographed photo once more before tucking it back into a Valentine's Day envelope buried deep within her drawer so that her mother would never find it. Shivers tiptoed up her spine as she lifted herself from her stool and walked out of her room wide awake, yet still caught in a dream that, as far as she knew, would never come true.

Cady walked out of her door and shut it to keep the passion from inundating the entire second floor of her natively adorned house. As she bubbly bounced down the stairs, still half-caught in a dream, her hair, now straightened and tied into a ponytail (which she only wore once a week), gently glided behind her in the air around her, which was being invaded by a certain artificial "Lilies of the pond" air freshener. At the third-to-last step of the short flight of stairs, Cady leaped off and landed gently, as if she was sure that an audience's upraised hands would break her fall.

She spotted her mother.

"Hey mom", she greeted her parent. Cady's mother looked up from washing celery in the sink. The tribal vases had been moved to the mantle above the fireplace.

"Hey Cady", her mother responded, "What's up?"

"What's for dinner?" Asked a curious Cady, who had now begun to peek over the counter into the stove to see for herself.

"Soup and sandwiches", her mother replied jokingly. Cady scanned the kitchen. She saw Melegueda pepper, pilau mix, turmeric, and ground nuts. She took a guess.

"Jollof rice and groundnut stew?"

"That's right", congratulated her mother. Cady smiled, pleased with herself. Suddenly she felt a shudder beneath her stomach. Her belly began to twitch. Word vomit?

No, just her cell phone. Cady reached into her pocket and pulled out the new pink Razor that she received as a gift for the reconciliatory acts that she performed at the Spring Fling. A strangely hoarse, deep, but nevertheless feminine voice startled Cady.

"Let's go out real quick. I need to get out of the house. Kevin and Damian are coming to", the voice insisted.

"Hold on, Janice, let me ask my mom", Cady replied. She turned to her mother who was stirring the nut stock with a wooden spoon.

"Mom, how long is it going to take for dinner to be ready?" She asked.

"Oh, about three more hours. I still need to simmer the zucchini, and the eggplants need to be washed", she explained.

"Ok, then, may I go out real quick? I'll be home before dinner".

"Sure. Just make sure you're home before then". Cady's mother had trusted her incredibly since the Burn Book Mess. What could her daughter do that was worse than that?

"Okay, sure thing", Cady lifted the phone from her shoulder to the side of her face, "Alright, where?" She asked Janice.

"In the food court at the mall".

"Okay, I'll be right over", confirmed Cady. She ran up the flight of stairs and pushed open the room to her door. Passion flowed out like a waterfall. As Cady began to fall into a dreamy state again, she grabbed her coat off of her bed and put it on. She didn't dare check her lip gloss or fix her hair in the mirror for fear of entering Plastic mode once again. She took the beret out of her hair and flung her hair straight back until it drooped down her vertebrae. She gave her "Mathletes" jacket a hitch, grabbed her leather pink purse and strolled, not strutted, out of the door.

"Bye mom, I'll be back in an hour or two", Cady informed her mother.

"Okay, Cady, just remember to be safe".

"Always", she replied. Instead of blowing two fake kisses and shouting "Love ya!" she quickly waved her hand in a "bye-bye" maneuver and pushed the garage door open. After opening the electronic garage door, she rolled out of the driveway, and sped off towards her true friends who awaited her at the mall.