An Endless Light
By Badgergater
Episode: Finale to season 5 and the series
Summary: It was a sad sad end, but the only fitting end, for a man like John Reese.
Author's note: Thanks to Scully for the beta.
POI xx POI xx POI xx POI xx POI
Reese smiled, staring up into the clear blue of the sky.
Time seemed to have slowed. He could feel each breath, the oxygen moving in and out of his lungs, the beating of his heart (not so steady now, it seemed to want to skip a beat here and there), and the blood flowing sluggishly through his veins.
Oddly, his body didn't hurt, despite the bullet holes and the blood and the knowledge that he was dying.
In fact he felt… light. As if a great weight had been lifted from him. Not from his shoulders, but from deep, deep inside him, from his very soul.
It was as if- in this one moment, a moment he knew would be his final one- his past had been scoured from him. No regrets, no guilt, no anguish over his failures. There was only light, soft and comforting, like the warmth of a summer sun.
The darkness was gone, replaced by a feeling he barely recognized- one of freedom, lightness, and, yes, even peace.
No need to fight. No need to fear. No need to bury his regrets in a bottle. He had wiped the slate clean, atoned for his sins (and they were legion), and made things right.
He had done what he had always been intended to do, fulfilled his purpose, achieved what he was capable of achieving.
Done his father proud.
Protected Harold. And Fusco. Shaw, too.
Likely saved the world, or at least set it free to be what it would be of its own accord.
In that fleeting moment, he laid down his burdens.
He had always known the end would be like this for him, sudden and violent. A fitting denouement- he was not the kind of man to die peacefully, in his bed, in his sleep, in old age. That had never been the fate awaiting a man like him.
What was coming next, he didn't know. He just knew it would be better.
Emerging into the light; an end to his long walk in the dark.
Good.
Just.
Free.
It felt… right.
He felt right.
At last.
Mission accomplished.
Almost as if in slow motion, he could see the missile as it approached, the vapor trail it left across the sky as it zeroed in on its target. Fitting—poetic almost- that after all this time, just as the CIA had intended years ago back in Ordos, a missile would obliterate him.
John Reese smiled.
When it arrived, he didn't close his eyes but stared unblinking into the endless light.