Crasherfella

I do not own any characters of "Crash Bandicoot". I only own my fan characters (i.e. Mayne and Marilyn).

Ghettogurl: Hello everyone. Welcome to Ghettogurl Fanfic Theatre, where you will see you favorite characters take on
the lives of thespians.

Crash(confused): Hey, wait a minute. I'm a guy and I like women, how does that make me a thespian?

Ghettogurl: Wha-? No, Crash, Thespians are actors not...never mind. Anyhoo, you will be seeing plays performed by your favorite characters, including fictional. Our first play is... (pulls out a slip of paper out of hat)... Cinderella.

(backstage)

Everyone else backstage: What?! Boo! (starts throwing things at me)

Ghettogurl: Hey, come on. You guys agreed to do this.

Crunch: Yeah, at sword point!

Ghettogurl: They don't need to know that. Besides this is a different version.

(Dingodile and Pinstripe appear)

Pinstripe: Hold on there, toots. We gots some negotiations to make with yous.

Dingodile: Yeah, we want in on this play too.

Ghettogurl: # 1, don't call me toots(pointing at Pinstripe) and # 2, I'm going to have give you two smaller parts for the show.

Pinstripe: All right, then. What part do we play?

Ghettogurl: Oh you'll see.

*Opening night*

Ghettogurl: Ladies and Gentleman. Watch as our favorite Crash and fan characters take the roles of thespians...
(backstage)

Crash: There's that word again. I don't like guys that way, darn it!

Mayne: Crash, she said thespians, not le...

(Coco covers Mayne's mouth)

Coco: Hey, there are kids out there!

Mayne: Sorry.

Ghettogurl:... our first play of the evening will be Crasherfella.

Annoying Kid: What? It's Cinderella!

Ghettogurl: No, it's Crasherfella, now sit down, little gnat!!! (ahem) The role of
Crasherfella will be played by Crash Bandicoot. Mayne and Marilyn are the
stepbrothers, and please refrain from asking questions about Marilyn being a
boy or a girl, it's very frustrating to explain over 3,000 times. Anyhoo, Coco Bandicoot is the godsister, Aku Aku is the guardian of the stepbrothers, Crunch is the narrator and Tawna is the princess. Please enjoy the show and shut off any devices that will cause a disturbance.

Annoying Kid: Boo! This show will suck!

Ghettogurl: Hey! You're about 8 words away from being thrown out of here! Enjoy!
(goes off stage)

Crunch(narrates): Far off the coast of Extreme Island, there lived a family of men, well a dysfunctional family that is. (Aku Aku, Mayne, Marilyn and Crash walk on stage) In this family we see Aku as the guardian of the three young men. Mayne, the oldest, is outside chopping wood and eating sunflower seeds.

Mayne: But I hate sunflower seeds!

Crunch: Too bad. I already told them you were eating them, now start chomping.

(Mayne sighs and chews on the sunflower seeds, but he takes some sawdust by
accident and chokes on it)

Crunch: Unfortunately, Mayne chokes on some sawdust, so Marilyn, the middle brother and or sister...

Marilyn: Hey!

Ghettogurl(whispering): Crunch.

Crunch: Oh sorry. Marilyn, the middle brother, goes to help him.

Marilyn: Hey Dad! Mayne swallowed the sawdust again!

Aku Aku: Oh no...Crash! Crash?

Crunch: Upstairs we see Crash, the youngest of the three, cleaning the toliets and laughing to himself.

Aku Aku: Crash? Where are you? We need to help your brother!

Crash: Coming. (tries to hold in laughter)

(Outside, the three men try to get Mayne to stop choking by performing the
hemlock remover. Mayne spits out the dust)

Aku Aku: Mayne, what have I told you about eating around wood particles?

Mayne(panting): I...know...about that...but that bag...of sawdust was not there...before...unless...(he sees Crash burst with laughter)CRASH!!!! (Mayne chases Crash around the stage)

Marilyn: Not another chase scene. (runs after them. Aku sighs)

Crunch: So the three brothers run all around the town, bumping into others as we speak.(the three guys run towards Crunch) No! Not into me! I'm the narrator! (collide)

Crash: Whoops, sorry narrator dude! (the three guys run around the stage and bumps into an "officer")

Komodo Moe: Bumping into officcccersss, I ssssee? You get ticketsssss! (writes ticket, gives in to the guys)

Crunch: After being trampled, the boys walk back home with a ticket, again.

Marilyn: I can't believe this! This is the 3rd ticket we got this month for running into the police!

Mayne: Well this wouldn't of happened if someone would learn to have self control. (glaring at Crash)

Crash: What? It was a joke, besides, you made me re-tile the roof all last night.

Mayne: That was because you were supposed to do it the day before and you didn't. It was raining and the house looked like we had Niagra Falls running through it!
Marilyn: Ok ok. How are we going to explain to Dad about this? (holding ticket)

(Aku Aku shows up)

Aku Aku: Explain what?

(the three boys jump)

Marilyn: Uh, dad well..see...

Aku Aku: You got another ticket again, didn't you?

(slience)

Aku Aku: Boys, I haven't begun to tell you how ridiculous this is getting...(knock on the door)

Mayne: I'll get it. (opens door) Yes, can you be helped?

Tiny: Tiny have letter for police bumpers. (gives letter to Mayne) *ahem*

Mayne:...what?

Tiny: You welcome. Tiny think you three are rude.
(Mayne slams door on Tiny's face) Ow! (Mayne walks back to scene)

Aku Aku: Who was at the door?

Mayne: Oh, just some stingy postman. The princess has invited us to her party
at Moulin Cortex tonight. I know I'm going.

Marilyn: Me too.

Crash: Me three.

Marilyn: Oh no you're not! You caused enough trouble today!

Crash: You can't tell me what I can and can't do.

Aku Aku: No, but I can. Marilyn's right Crash, you put Mayne through
a health hazard this morning and for that, you can't go to the party!

Crash: WHAT? Ok, what if I finish all my chores for today, then can I go?

Aku Aku:... Alright, but no more endangered practical jokes on your brothers
and all of your chores must be done.

Crash: Yay! So... what time is the party again? (Marilyn and Mayne glare at
him)

(applause)

End of Act 1

Ghettogurl: We'll have a brief intermission.