Chapter One

A/N: Hi, everyone! This is my first published fanfiction, so I'm a little nervous. While there are definitely better authors out there than me, I'm sure that this is better than My Immortal (at least)!

Anyways, this is a crossover between South Park and Soul Eater, because I am completely insane. :D The first two chapters are super short, because they're really just little introductions. Nothing much happens. (Wow, that's great advertisement for my story. xD) This is meant to be silly. I don't care if you find plot holes or whatever, because it's meant for comedy and for the sheer joy of putting these two together.

I do not own any characters or anything at all. Everything belongs to their original owners, unless specified otherwise. This crossover has probably been done before, but I don't know of any. I'm not trying to steal ideas. xD

Rated M 16+ for language and suggestive situations. (There's a little bit of Kenny x Butters and Pip x Damien. Sorry, I can't resist. xD)

Well, I better stop with this author's note. It's getting' to be longer than the actual chapter.

"Seriously, Kenny?"

"DUDE, THAT WAS SWEET!"

"Does this mean we don't have to go to school anymore?"

"Wow, Kenny. I never thought you'd be the person to do that…" The students of South Park Elementary were all lined up outside the school grounds, which were now brimming with ashes. Fourth grader Kenny McCormick was responsible for the school fire, and everyone was either concerned that their classmate was a possible pyromaniac or completely stoked for the possibility of no school for a long time.

Stan Marsh, a friend and classmate of Kenny's, was quite confused as to how this feat was accomplished. "Kenny," he started, "how in the hell did you completely burn down the school?"

Before Kenny could speak, another friend and classmate, Kyle Broflovski, cut in with, "The real question is—WHY the hell did you completely burn down the school? We're gonna be completely behind all the other fourth graders in the world and it'll keep us from college which will make it harder for us to find jobs and—"

"Dude," Stan interrupted, patting his friend on the back, "we were already behind. We never learn anything in that school, remember?" After Kyle let out an annoyed huff, Stan turned back to Kenny. "But seriously, man, Kyle's got a good question. Why DID you burn it?"

"Mmmpth mmmnnth mmnnnph mphhnmm mnph phmmn nmmm!" replied Kenny rather joyfully, muffled by his massive, orange parka.

The boys stared at him stupidly. They couldn't even process the horror of what Kenny had just replied. Nightmares were bound to ensue after hearing Kenny's reasoning.

After a moment or two, Kyle and Stan snapped out of their trance when they heard a terrified shriek.

"GAAAAAAAIIIIIIIISSSSSSSS!" screeched the voice.

"Oh God," muttered Kyle. The three boys realized their friend-that-nobody-likes briskly waddling toward their direction. "It's Cartman."

Out of breath, Eric Cartman finally reached the three. "Kenneh…" he breathed in his strange, yet addicting, voice, "YOU ASSHOLE!" Cartman lunged for Kenny and grabbed his neck. Shaking the little poor boy back and forth, he screamed, "AY! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING? I HAD A BOX OF CHEESY POOFS IN MAH DESK!"

"Shut up, fatass. You can get more from your house or whatever," said Kyle. Still shaking Kenny by his neck, Cartman pointed his hand at Kyle.

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! I was GOOOING to EAT those!" Kyle swatted Cartman's hand out of his face as he rolled his eyes.

"Seriously, though, Cartman. Because you lost that precious box of Cheesy Poofs, your mom will buy you even more. 'Sides, don't you realize? We might not have to go to school anymore! And please stop doing that to Kenny. You're gonna give him Shaken Baby Syndrome or something…" Stan interjected.

Cartman ceased the violence and anger. A look of wonder and curiosity spread across his face. "Wh-what…?"

"Your mom will buy you—"

"No! What did you say about skewl?"

"Well, now that it's burned down, we probably won't be going for a while…" Cartman slowly lowered Kenny.

"Sweet!" Cartman then exclaimed as he hugged his friends. "At least we don't have to worry about Kenneh getting arrested—he's too poor for anyone to care!" Three of the four boys laughed as Kenny grumbled.

"Dude, don't be mad! There's no more school!" Stan told Kenny, which caused him to break into giggle-fits as well.

"NO SCHOOL!" The four of them yelled as the student body cheered.

"What? Of course you'll be attending school: it's the law! We just have to find you boys another place to go, is all," Stan's mom explained to the four. Their hearts sank right into the pit of their stomachs. Not only would they still have to go to school, but they would have to adjust to a new one, and, worse yet, LEARN.