A Day in the Life of an Effie

by Peeta's a stalker

Ever wonder what our favorite escort does? Well now you know! Our favorite escort talks about shoes and clothes, along with what it's like to be her. This is just a little one shot that is meant to be funny. I was tired and hyperactive when I wrote this. Dont Expect it to make any sense. Don't be mean. If you don't like it don't read it again.

A day in the Life of an Effie

When I wake up in the morning, I think yippee! Another wonderful day to be me. I can do all sorts of things like get my hair done, get my nails done, go shopping, watch TV, get another wig, or maybe even get new nails. I heard that three inches is so in season. So I walk downstairs, almost falling because it's kinda hard to walk in slippers. Who does that anyway? Oh, right. The poor people in the districts. Poor things. They don't even know what fashion is. But I do! Fashion is like rainbows and unicorns. Perfect! And then I eat breakfast, but I can't eat too much because I already weigh 45 pounds, and a three inch waist is always in season. And now people are even doing their hair in three braids cause Katniss came out of the Hunger Games and everyone loved her braids. Three is the new black. But black isn't a nice color cause then how would we match it with pink? Cause pink and black was so 2999. This is 3000! I can't be caught dead in last year's colors. That would be cra-cra. And not to mention totes embarrassing. So after I eat I walk to the movie store and by a new copy of "Being Obedient to Snow Because He is Named After Frozen Precipitation". I don't know what precipitation means, but frozen is what happens to my margaritas when the Avox puts it in the blender with ice. I'm a lot smarter than some of my friends. Cause they can't read. I can though. And I know words like cat and bat and hat and that and mat and fat and rat. I like rhyming and I'm very good at it too. That's why I'm an escort. Cause I'm a wizard of smart. Yippee!