AN: Hi guys! Heron here. I was originally going to do another one-shot, but that one sucked... So I just tried out this one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Anyways, I hope this was enough to earn a few chuckles from you guys. Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: BLACKHERON104 DOES NOT OWN TMI, EVERYONE KNOWS THAT.
Pick-up lines
"Hey red, you seem familiar,-"
"Didn't know you had nightmares that often."
"-did we have class together?-"
"No."
"-Because I could have sworn we had chemistry."
"...It'd be nice if you blew yourself up."
"I'm bad in History,-"
"No shit."
"-but I can remember when I first saw you."
"...Isn't that sad? You don't have alzheimers yet. Guess I'll have to wait a little longer."
"You smell like trash,-"
"Glad to know you smell me dufus."
"-can I take you out?"
"I'd rather stay away from the other trashes."
"Clary, there's something wrong with my telephone.-"
"Too bad dimwit."
"-It doesn't have your number in it."
"..."
"You should stop banging the table Spitfire, I'm pretty sure it's too dirty for you liking."
"..."
"You face is getting red…"
"...JACE HERONDALE! I WILL LITERALLY CASTRATE YOU!"
"I'm pleased to inform you that your desire to see me naked is mutual."
"JACE!"
"Okay! Okay! Geez woman, take a chill pill."
"Can I tie your shoes?-"
"I'm not wearing shoelaces dumbass."
"-'cause I can't have you falling for anyone else."
"...You and your Jace-germs better stay away from my shoes."
"Ouch! You wound me."
"Why aren't you majoring in drama next year?"
"You remind of my pinkie toe,-"
"If I stink that much, would you leave me alone?!"
"-little, cute and I'll probably bang you on the coffee table later tonight."
"...Jace?"
"Y-ye-y-yeah?
"Here's a finger."
"..."
"MS FAIRCHILD! We do not tolerate the middle finger being shown in such manner in this school! Principal's office! Now!"
"But Mr Aldertree-"
"NOW!"
"Do you mind if I walk you home?-"
"No thanks, I don't normally let perverted creeps follow me home."
"I've always been told to follow my dreams."
"You're dreams will be nightmares if you don't shut the fuck up."
"Is that a mirror in your pocket?-"
"No."
"-'Cause I can see myself in your pants."
"I'm seriously considering sending you to a mental asylum."
"Do-"
"There! Now will you stop those horrible puns and pick-up lines?!"
"You lips still look lonely, would they want to meet up again?"
"...You asked for one Asshat!"
"And now you're my girlfriend."
AN: Anyways, I better get going now. I'm being threatened for my laptop to be taken away :(
Reviews make me happy!