He Won't Bow

by Jademarshal

Ian left but he has no doubt of the outcome; he will die and he's sorry for that. He's sorry that he never said goodbye, he's sorry that Mandy had to tell them were he was. War isn't a game and Ian knows that, so does Mickey but that doesn't mean he'll write Gallagher, not while there's still breath in his body but Ian's not like that and he knows he doesn't have long, so he writes

1. Chapter 1

I don't fucking bow, I salute. Each blank eyed, stif jerk of the hand reminds me that I will die, there's no doubt about it, but I dedicate myself to the life of thousands who will never be remembered by name. We will never be called out individually by any other than our family and friends we left at home, except to be lumped together with all the others who fight for their country.

The first day I got here I met a man who had a wife and two daughters. Six months later he died when he threw himself in front of a blast; protecting myself and five other men, three of which died before the night was out. That night when the troops sat down for dinner no one mentioned him, all the Cornel said was 'and let's us pray for those who bravely sacrificed themselves for their country.'

Sometimes I wonder if it was worth it to leave. There isn't a moment when I'm thinking clearly that I don't regret enlisting before West Point, or leaving without saying goodbye but every time I consider never stepping foot onto that bus I imagine Mikey's face as he tried to say the simplest of words, no I couldn't have stayed, I would have gone insane.