Freak Out Stay Cool

by break.your.bones.mr.jones

Unknown at the moment...it's like a diary but in a manly way. Let's call it a Top Secret Book For the Public Regarding Conspiracies (a.k.a. Tweek's ideas. In a diary. But it's not a diary. It's a journal. 'Cause guys write in journals. And Tweek's a boy. He means man. Now he won't talk to me. I should probably stop now.) It's an adventurous story that goes everywhere. I went there.

1. Supernova'd

Lately, I've been working on this theory.

If the sun were to beam down, I wouldn't want to be anywhere and I wouldn't be sad to be anywhere else. I'd just be stuck in this endless limbo. And then it's like I wouldn't be happy about it or sad. It'd just be kinda…whatever.

If I were to say that it would kill me, then I'd totally be breaking my rules, wouldn't I? Logic sucks…but what if I can't think anything sucks? What if everything is just…average. What if I'm average?

I can't possibly be average. No. But what is average?

Also! IF god exists, why in hell would he make such boring people? I sit and listen to my parents friends. They talk about all this crap and they're like "I ate this wonderful cheese. It was cheap too." And everyone nods in interest. And they ask "Where did you get it?" and, no shit, they're sincere. "At the new bakery downtown." And then. "They carry cheese there?" And "Yes, I was surprised too."

Then I come in and am all like "Is that the bakery in place of where the old drugstore used to be?" and they answer with "Yes. What a nice man who used to run that place." 'cause I know I'm right. "I've got a funny story to tell. The man who used to run the drugstore was actually a mental patient at the hospital right above. Old habits die hard, I guess, 'cause he did end up subscribing himself to over thirty of those drugs over the course of 1965 to 1976. Eventually, the pills got the better of him and he imagined his dead wife on the face of teenage boy…he began to think that he could create anything he wanted and why would he create anything at all with nothing so he OD'd on medication. God complex."

'Cept. I didn't say that…I said "H-he couldn't li-live with the f-fact that where h-he ca-came from was un-unknown." And twitched. My parents tried hard to live with the fact that they had no idea where I got that from.

So. I guess I'm not average.

Maybe I won't be in limbo. But I could be in hell…if that were to exist.

See, this is why my theory is a working process.