Title: Fault
Fandom: NCIS
Author: Alidiabin
Words: 943
Disclaimer: I own nothing
Warnings: None
Spoilers: General
Parings: Tony/Ziva, past Tony/Jeanne
Summary: Tony finds out something happened to Jeanne; Tony believes he is at fault. Ziva is caught in the carnage.
Fault
Tony DiNozzo laid the newspaper across his mahogany coffee table as he sat in his apartment on a Saturday morning.
"You look like an old man," Ziva said chuckling from the kitchen where she stood waiting for the kettle to boil clad only in his OSU t-shirt. The kettle boiled and she emerged from the kitchen carrying two cups one of coffee and one of tea.
"Last night you definitely did not call me an old man," Tony said as Ziva handed him the coffee. She leaned in close. "What is it you called me again" Tony asked as Ziva sat just millimeters from him intoxicating him.
" My Italian stallion" Ziva uttered looking away and suppressing a giggle. Tony smiled. She turned around "Age is just a number" she responded. Tony flipped the page of the newspaper scanning the page. She leaned on Tony's shoulder.
"You know my parents used to make me and Tali walk to the corner shop every day and buy two different newspapers," Ziva said. Tony looked at her it was rare Ziva shared childhood memories and even rarer she would initiate the conversation. "It was because my father read the right wing newspaper that justified Israel's actions against Palestine and my mother read the leftist newspaper that did not support such actions and wanted peace"
Tony listened to another tale of her parents Eli and Nadia David who were polar opposites yet had been married rather unhappily and unfaithfully for nearly twenty-five years when Tali died.
"And when the other one wasn't there, the parent that was present would still make us buy both" Ziva said concluding her story.
Tony stopped listening. He stared at the headline.
YOUNG DOCTOR KILLED IN AFRICA
He noticed Jeanne Benniot photograph. He felt sick. Ziva moved around behind him.
"Are you even listening?" Ziva asked. She looked at the page. She recognized Jeanne Benniot's photograph.
She read from over his shoulder. Jeanne had been working in a clinic for women and children in a country with a raging civil war, and a group of soldiers had stormed into the camp in search of medical supplies. Jeanne had apparently wanted to play hero and sacrificed herself to save the sick and the injured.
Tony felt Ziva's hand squeeze his shoulder in comfort.
"Don't," Tony, said getting up Ziva's hand flew from his shoulder. He pivoted so that he faced Ziva "Don't comfort me" Ziva looked at him, her eyes as per usual spoke volumes more than her tongue. "It's my fault she's dead"
"No it is not" Ziva hissed she begun folding up the newspaper. Tony pulled it from her hands.
"She wouldn't have been in the middle of Africa if I hadn't broken her heart," Tony shouted. Ziva paused.
"Tony it has been nearly four years," Ziva uttered formally telling Tony she was desperately trying to remain calm. "Besides, you were under orders." Tony threw the scrunched up newspaper on the coffee table.
"This is not mossad Ziva" he shouted, "Jeanne Benniot was not collateral damage" Tony noticed any attempt by Ziva to remain calm dissolve. She rushed to Tony's bedroom and slammed the door. Tony heard her angrily search for her clothes and tip over some of his furniture in anger. Ten minutes later, she emerged fully dressed. She violently swung the door open then slammed it again.
"Jeanne Benniot is not your fault Tony," Ziva uttered before darting towards her front door and slamming it behind her.
The following Monday Tony was notably absent from NCIS burnt orange walled bullpen. Gibbs looked at Ziva who had dark bags under her eyes not from being kept up all night because of sweaty lovemaking but because of worry. He caught her eye. He silently ordered her to go find Tony. She silently ensured him, she would explain later. McGee looked up from his computer completely oblivious.
Ziva remembered that Jeanne's funeral was being held at a cemetery in Virginia. She drove her beat up scarlet red mini cooper toward the graveyard. She stood in the car park as Jeanne's friends, family and colleagues wandered up from her gravesite recalling memories most of them happy. She noticed Tony still standing at her gravesite. She grabbed her keys and headed down the gravel path.
Tony faced Jeanne's grave.
"I know sorry probably doesn't cut it," he uttered. "I know you wished we had never met and then you'd of never ended up like the constant gardener"
"That was about drug companies and British civil servants," Ziva uttered from behind him remembering the British movie she had picked up in blockbusters a few months ago due to a little crush on the main actor and having read Ducky's copy of the book. Tony turned to face Ziva not caring for her movie reference. "I'm sorry" Ziva uttered, "I should be more tactful"
"No," Tony, said "It is I who should be sorry" Ziva moved closer to him. Their hands met. "She died doing what she always wanted to do she was helping people" Tony said "According to her mother it was always in her five point plan" a smile crossed his face as he remembered the five point plan being discussed when Jeanne's mother was in town which had included marriage and children to which Tony had responded with gulp. Jeanne's mother had uttered something rude in response about the quality of men and comparing Tony to Jeanne's father.
"So it was not your fault," Ziva uttered.
"No it wasn't" Tony uttered. They stood facing Jeanne's grave their hands interlocked. He kissed Ziva's forehead. "It's not my fault," he repeated not yet believing it.
A/N: Because I wanted to kill, Jeanne Benniot off I wrote this.