The painful feeling off loss is eternal, whether they just walk away, or you have to let them go, or illness takes them in end. Whatever it may be, that pain always stays. Some days are harder than others to cope with it, but in time, you learn to make room for it. A century had passed since the Doctor left Rose with his meta-crisis form on the banks of Bad Wolf Bay in the parallel universe. All that time, the Doctor traveled alone after losing Donna. His hearts couldn't take the ache any longer, that burning sensation, that feeling of emptiness and dread. The Doctor's only solution for the never ending pain was to no longer travel with companions.

"Doctor" rang her voice within his mind, within his thoughts. "Doctor, please, I need you"

Why did her voice torture him so? Slowly those dark chocolate brown eyes opened as he looked to the TARDIS monitor before him through black horned rimmed rectangular spectacles. Reaching up the Time Lord slowly pulled the plastic frames away from his face and folded them up pocketing them. With a heavy sigh he reached up and rubbed his eyes before pinching the bridge of his nose. "Not again…". For nearly three months now, Rose Tyler's voice called out to him, every single time his mind rested and his body was at ease. Why did she plague his dreams? Why couldn't he just let her go? Wasn't that even now she still held his hearts? His mind was a whirl of thoughts as he sat there, the never ending pain stabbing away at his hearts. The sight of her reaching out in an attempt to hold onto him was fading away within his mind.

Tears burned in the Time Lord's eyes as he lifted his gaze to the ceiling of the TARDIS "Rose.." just speaking her name was like daggers straight through his hearts as he closed his eyes the tears broke free from their confinement and began to cascade in a trickling down his face "Why can't I let you go?" the Time Lord blamed himself for being unable to release her from his thoughts, from his mind, from his hearts, he couldn't let her go. Even now. an involuntary sob escaped him, but he did his best to refrain from the rest. "My Darling Rose" wiping his face free of his tears the Time Lord slowly brought himself to his feet as he'd been sitting in the chair near the main control panel of the TARDIS console.

With a rather dragged and heavy breath of a sigh, the Doctor slid his hands and into pinstriped suit pant pockets and circled the console of his TARDIS. He been thinking about this for weeks, maybe visiting that parallel universe would give him a sense of closure? The Doctor hoped so. Having had the TARDIS orbiting around a new born star in the Neistra constellation gathering all the energy of the star that the TARDIS could hold. The Doctor was planning on doing something that he never thought he'd do in so many years of life. Going against his teachings, going against Gallifreyan laws, the Time Lord was going to reopen that dimensional rift and travel to the parallel universe. He needed to, he truly believed that this would give him closure. It would be a painful closure but it was something the Doctor knew he needed to do.

Stopping near the monitor once more he reached out and began to turn a few knobs, flip a few switches and crank a few levers. "This is going to be a tough ride, Girl" he pat his TARDIS delicately "But I know we can do this" typing in the coordinates of their exact travel of flight the Doctor closed his eyes and drew in a breath. The ache hadn't left his hearts, if he continued on like this it would consume him and cause him to spiral into madness. He couldn't let that happen, no, not now, not ever. Gulping thickly those deep brown eyes opened, it was now or never. His hearts were racing, rapidly thudding in his chest, his breathing becoming deeply labored as he held onto the final lever "Allons-y!" his signature phrase rang from his throat as he flipped the final lever.

The TARDIS wheezed and huffed to life racing for the set coordinates with immense speed and precision. The exterior of the ship glowed with golden energy from the new born star, The Time Lord braced himself for impact "Come on ol' girl! just one final push!" he called up to his TARDIS flipping a few more switches, activating all the shields he possibly could to make sure no harm came to his TARDIS, or as little as could be possible. With the final flip of a lever, that was enough for the TARDIS to break through the barrier keeping him out of the parallel universe. Bounding down for the sandy shores of Bad Wolf Bay the TARDIS collided with sand but landed upright which was a surprise for the Doctor. Having literally been floored upon impact the Doctor was on his feet within seconds and raced for the doors.

Throwing them open a wave salty air brushed his face the moment that door opened, he looked out to the waves as they crashed against the shore. "We did it" he gave a smile, a sad smile but still it was a smile. Reaching for his tan trench coat the Doctor slipped it on and headed out of the TARDIS. Making the long travel up the sandy banks to the concrete of the road. It wasn't long after that the Doctor came upon the cemetery, walked from aisle to aisle he froze upon seeing the name 'Jaqueline Tyler' beside her 'Peter Tyler' was Rose going to be buried here? The images of the two Tylers flashed before his eyes. As he walked, he saw Tony Tyler, a few other Tylers no doubt the man's wife and children.

But what caused the Doctor to freeze up was the name he saw on the headstone at the very end of that row 'Theta Sigma' taking a step closer he knelt down and brushed his fingers against the grass. After a few moments the Doctor straightened his form as he stared down to headstone before looking a bit further down, there were no more headstones in that row "… where is hers?" he stepped around and traveled for a few rows and found nothing. His hearts raced with panic, had they moved her? Had she been buried somewhere else? the Doctor found himself back at Theta's headstone and reached up pinching the bridge of his nose. Taking in a breath to calm his ever so racing hearts he needed to strategize and think this through "You're here…" he spoke to Theta's headstone as he gave a sniff, wiping a few tears that had fallen "But she isn't… why?" With a heavy sigh the Doctor's hands slipped into his coat pockets as he lifted his chocolate brown gaze to the sky "Where could my Darling Rose be?"

~*oOo*~

Days turned into months, months turned into years. This parallel world that was thought to be just like any other, aged just like any other – with the exception of one. The woman never aged a day, never showed a hair of gray or a wrinkle of old. Rose Tyler appeared just as Rose Tyler was the day her Doctor met her and till the day he left her. No one could explain this phenomenon; even Torchwood was having some difficulty in finding a solution. The only thing that had changed was her maturity. Granted, her physical appearance never altered, but her mind grew more with knowledge day by day. And then, there were those moments, those dreams – or, rather, nightmares. The nightmares were progressively getting worse and difficult for her to handle. There were times when she wanted to resort to drinking, but she knew that was her genetics calling to her to make that inferior move. The nightmares consisted of a golden light that would engulf her and cease her existence. Sometimes, there was another being there to rescue her but she could never identify the savior with the blue light. She simply made the assumption it was he, even though she hadn't seen him in years.

When she finally grew tired of her department, Rose left the Torchwood Academy for the day and went off on her way home. There had been a recent case of an occult like race appearing on Earth, in that realm, that was slowly taking hostages one by one. Torchwood had been on the case for a week, yet, there seemed to be a lack of progression. If only he was there. He would know what to do. He would know how to fix the problem – and he would be there to hold her too. The young woman tucked her hands into her wool pea coat, which hugged her body warmly. She hurried on down the street, passing the cemetery. As she neared the area, she paused feeling an odd sensation. She pressed a hand to her chest and backed up against the wall. In her head, there was a soft melodic hum. Rose hadn't heard that sound in a long time. But, could it be? "W..where are you?" she murmured and pushed herself off the wall. Her footfalls hastened as she almost passed the cemetery, yet, she stopped. She felt as if she was being guided by the sound in her head.

The Time Lord hadn't been able to understand, with Theta being buried near the Tyler Family, that meant he was accepted by them, right? By Rose? But what was going on? where was she? He had expected to find her grave there near his duplicate's grave, but nothing of the sort. 'She's not here… where in blazes could she possibly be?!' The Doctor's mind raced as he furiously ran his fingers through his hair in aggravation. 'Rose … my darling Rose.. where are you?' The Doctor felt anger coursing through his body as his hearts raced, thudding frantically in his chest. It never crossed his mind that she was still alive. That wasn't possible, she was human.

Average human life lasted seventy years, some ninety but nothing more. Rare occasions it was a hundred but that was very very rare. Rose should have been slumbering in eternal peace at least twenty or so years ago. She should have been buried with her family. But her headstone wasn't there, did that mean she was alive? Oh that was a ridiculous theory one the Doctor quickly dismissed from his thoughts. With a heavy sigh, the Time Lord brought himself to his knees as he sat there, his gaze just burning into the headstone of his duplicate. As he sat there his eyes focused upon each and every detail, they landed upon a symbol that had to been etched into the stone 'What is that?'

Reaching into his pocket he pulled out his horned rimmed spectacles and slid them up the bridge of his nose. "Sorry…" he whispered to the man buried six feet below as he crawled on the grass up to the headstone, he ran his finger along the marking "… Gallifreyan Script?" he knew his duplicate held his memories, his knowledge but a Gallifreyan symbol or word? The Doctor strained to read it, but he couldn't. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out his sonic screwdriver and changed the frequency settings on the device, placing the tip upon the symbol he pressed the button. As the blue light lit up at the tip of his device the entire symbol itself shone with a magnificent blue sparkle of a glow. Now that the symbol was visible, the Doctor read it instantly, but upon realizing it his deep chocolate brown hues widened. Bad Wolf the Time Lord gasped for breath as his hearts simultaneously skipped four beats at the realization.

In that instant, memories swarmed back to the Time Lord's mind, flooding him with the memory. He was on the ground in his Ninth incarnation the TARDIS materializing. And Rose, oh his beautiful Rose glowing gold with the energy of the time vortex. Her voice so delicate, so gentle, yet held such power and strength. 'I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself' the rest was a blur but he heard her voice again ' I want you safe, my Doctor.' As the memories were pushed back into the darker crevices of his mind the Time Lord sat there leaning against the headstone of his duplicate, clutching his chest as he took in several deep breaths to try to calm his racing hearts.

The Doctor pushed himself to stand as he quickly stepped off the grave of his duplicate and moved to stand near it "It all makes sense… Bad Wolf" there was an mixture of feelings taking over his body "Sh-She's alive… I know it… that's why she's not here" a smile began to spread across his lips "Hah!" a laugh involuntarily escaped his lips which he quickly silenced the moment he felt a presence nearing.. Someone was coming, but who? Closing his eyes the Time Lord focused he saw an aura of fuchsia nearing, he knew that aura. 'Rose..'.

Rose's heartbeat began to race. Her breath quickened. She took a few reluctant steps forward, fearing that all thoughts would be wrong. "Doctor?" Rose called out, "Are you here?" Her voice sounded almost like a desperate plea.