AN: I think a group of people who get injured as often as ninjas would have to deal with this eventually.

Addiction

Ninjas got injured; it was just a hazard of the job. Kakashi seemed to be especially good at it, mostly because he took the most chances and the most S-class missions. This time he managed to get Sasuke's katana straight through his gut, and only Sakura's quick intervention saved his life. Naruto rushed him to Konoha, running through the town with his friend on his back. He barely made it in time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was night before Jiraiya could get away from his duties long enough to visit Kakashi at the hospital. Sakura was sitting with him. She looked worn out.

"How long have you been awake?" Jiraiya asked.

"I don't know. I helped in the battle and pulled another shift in surgery, and I've been here for a few hours. I didn't want him to wake up alone. He's only semi-conscious now. We have him on morphine."

"I'll take over," Jiraiya said. "Go home and get some rest."

"Thanks. He had one surgery already, but he's going to need at least two more. Don't give him any water, no matter how much he wants it. He's being hydrated. Tsunade has him scheduled for surgery again about four A.M, and until then he's not to have any liquids."

She left and Jiraiya sat down in the seat Sakura had just vacated. Kakashi was indeed semi-conscious, and he lay with glazed eyes. His face was so pale he almost looked translucent, with bright red spots on his cheeks. He occasionally tried to communicate with Jiraiya, but the most he could do was grunt and mumble. He tracked Jiraiya's movements with his eyes, but other than that he was unresponsive.

Jiraiya put a book on the bedside table. "I brought a book. When you're awake enough you can read it."

Kakashi was asleep. Jiraiya sighed and pulled a book from his satchel. He read until he heard Kakashi stirring. His eyes were clear, but pain was etched on his face.

"You awake?" Jiraiya asked.

"Yeah. How long have I been out?"

Jiraiya looked at the clock. It was two A.M. No wonder he felt so tired. He'd fought a battle already, and now he had to sit with Kakashi. Kakashi had sat with him enough times in hospitals, though.

"I guess about 12 hours or so. You had to have surgery. Does it hurt much?"

"Not as bad as before," Kakashi said. He gulped and licked his lips. "I really need some water."

"No water. Sakura's orders," Jiraiya said. "You're hydrated. You don't really need it; you just think you do."

"Just enough to wet my throat?" Kakashi asked. "It's really dry."

"Nice try," Jiraiya said. "Don't try to be sneaky with me. I taught your teacher how to be sneaky. You're a hundred years too young to outsmart me, brat."

Kakashi grumbled.

To try to distract him, Jiraiya picked up the book. "I brought you a new copy of Icha-Icha Paradise. I figured yours must have been destroyed in the battle."

"Thanks, but I really don't feel well enough to read," Kakashi said.

Jiraiya placed his huge paw of a hand on Kakashi's forehead. It felt hot and dry. "You must be really sick. I don't think I've ever heard you say that."

A nurse came in and took his temperature. She made a note on a chart and checked his vitals.

"Any pain?" she asked.

"Enough," Kakashi said.

"You have surgery in a couple hours, so I can't give you any morphine," she said.

"I can do without it," Kakashi said, but his face showed disappointment.

She knew better than to remind Jiraiya about visiting hours, which had ended long ago. Ninjas just crept through windows or cut holes in the roof when their friends were injured. It was less destructive just to let them have their own way. "He needs rest before surgery," she said, knowing that would be more effective than quoting rules.

"I get the hint," Jiraiya said. "Take care, brat. I'll see you when I can."

As he left he heard Kakashi trying unsuccessfully trying to get the nurse to give him water.

Kakashi woke after his next surgery to find Naruto sitting with him. The lights were off, but Kakashi had excellent night vision. Moonlight streamed through the blinds, lighting parts of Naruto's face.

Unlike Jiraiya, who had sat in hospitals with enough comrades to know how to pace himself, Naruto sat looking at Kakashi with intense concentration.

"How long have you been here?" Kakashi asked. "I know I'm beautiful when I sleep. You just couldn't help it, could you?" he teased.

"I got here a couple hours ago," Naruto whispered. "Keep it down. I don't want the nurse here. She's a new one, and she wouldn't let me in earlier. I had to sneak through the window."

"Well, that is what windows are for," Kakashi said. "Can you give me some water?"

Naruto fetched him a cup, and he drank it greedily, spilling half of it down his chest. "Finally," he said.

"How are you feeling?" Naruto asked. "You look rough."

"About the same as before the surgery – weaker if anything. I could do with some morphine. It's the only upside to being injured."

"You'd better be careful. That stuff is addictive."

"You need to lighten up, Naruto. I've had morphine before. It's ok."

They heard the distinctive clip-clop of sensible shoes coming down the hall. Naruto shut himself in the closet until the nurse checked Kakashi, gave him a shot, and left.

"You want me to stick around for awhile?" Naruto asked. "I don't have a mission for a couple more days."

"If you want," Kakashi said. "Hospitals are lonely places. I'd appreciate the company."

"I brought some cards," Naruto said. He pulled out a worn pack from his pack.

Kakashi tried to sit up, but a sharp pain in his gut told him that was a bad idea. They played hearts until the drugs kicked in, and Naruto kept Kakashi talking just to hear the stupid things he was saying on the morphine.

"There's a lot of stuff I should have told you when you were a kid. Important stuff," Kakashi drawled.

"Like what?" Naruto asked.

"What?" Kakashi asked.

Naruto had to keep from snickering. "You said you had stuff you wished you'd told me when I was a kid."

"Did I?" Kakashi asked.

"Yeah, what did you want to tell me?" Naruto covered his mouth to keep Kakashi from hearing him laugh.

Kakashi was obviously struggling to think. "Wear boxers. Tighty whities kill sperm."

This time Naruto laughed out loud. "What else?" he asked.

"Wrap it before you tap it, and don't get with anything you'll need a penicillin shot for afterwards."

Naruto had to put his head on the table, and he pounded the bedside table with a fist. "That's awesome. Thanks for the advice," he said when he could stop laughing long enough to talk again.

"No problem kid. You're alright."

Naruto didn't realize it was time for Sakura's shift until he heard her voice in the corridor. He hid in the closet, hoping she wouldn't catch him. Kakashi was asleep and didn't really need him around, but Naruto always wanted to stay with his precious people when they were hurt. Naruto was one of the few ninjas the nurses bothered trying to kick out of the hospital. He would stay awake until he made himself sick when one of his friends was injured.

Kakashi woke while she was checking him. "Hello, Amazon lady," he said, and grinned.

"I'm going to assume that's the drugs talking, or you'd be in some real trouble. You obviously don't need more morphine yet."

"No, but I'll take some. I love morphine."

"You better watch out, or you'll become a junkie."

He snickered.

Sakura heard a small sound and cocked her head, listening. She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Naruto, get out of the closet."

He stepped into the room bashfully. "How did you know it was me?"

"Because no one else would do that. What are you doing?" Sakura asked.

"The nurse chased me off," he said. "I wanted to be here."

"Go home," she said.

Naruto left quietly. She turned to Kakashi. "You know better than to encourage him. You're only getting off because you're injured."

"I'm getting off?" he asked. "Are you offering, because this is new." He giggled.

"You're really annoying on morphine, you know that?" Sakura said, but she couldn't hide a smile. She kissed him on the forehead. "Get better soon."

"We have to stop meeting like this," Kakashi said.

He was a quick healer, and he left the hospital a couple weeks later. He went home to recuperate, and about a week later Jiraiya came home from a long mission and headed straight for Kakashi's house. He had asked to be let off duty when Kakashi got out of the hospital, but he was the best suited for this mission, and he didn't want to tell Tsunade why Kakashi needed his help.

He snuck through the window and found Kakashi on the couch, holding the remote in his hand while he slept. The screen was just static, but Kakashi snored loudly over the noise. Jiraiya sighed as he picked up a needle off the coffee table.

He shook Kakashi. "Wake up brat. We need to talk."

"What?" Kakashi asked drowsily. "Not now."

"Yes now. I have to do this every time you get injured." He held up the needle. "What's the excuse this time?"

"You're not my father," Kakashi said. "It's my business."

"I may not be a relative, but I practically raised you. It is my business."

Kakashi pulled a cushion over his head. "Go away."

Jiraiya began searching the house, beginning with the living room. Kakashi always had a different spot to hide the drugs. He searched over light fixtures, behind paintings, under the carpet. He shook things to see if they sounded hollow. He finally found a baggie with morphine and needles taped under the kitchen cabinet. He tucked it into his shirt to dispose of later.

"Found your stash," Jiraiya said. "Where are you getting this stuff?"

"I have a guy," Kakashi said.

"Someday I'm going to find your "guy" and take care of that. I'm coming over tomorrow. Be sober so we can talk."

"Fuck you," Kakashi said.

"You're not my type." He slammed the door on the way out.

When he came back the next afternoon Kakashi was restlessly fidgeting on the couch.

"Do we really need to have this talk again?" Jiraiya asked. "You really need to go to rehab."

"It wouldn't help. We all get injured, and I'll just have the same problem again next time." We wiped his arm across his sweating forehead.

"You must have been shooting up a lot," Jiraiya.

"If they'd give me something else in the hospital I wouldn't have this problem. I only shoot up after I get out."

"So it's someone else's fault – not yours?" Jiraiya asked. "You sound like a junkie."

"I'm not a junkie. I just have a bit of a problem. I can't think about much else for a while after I get out."

"You mean you can't think about much else until I find your stash and you have to stop."

"Ok, I have a problem," Kakashi said.

"That's the first time you've said that," Jiraiya said. "I'll find an NA meeting for you."

When he came back the next day, Kakashi was holding a tissue to his nose and sniffling occasionally. His eyes ran, and he tapped his foot constantly.

"At least I know you quit, or you wouldn't be having withdrawal effects," Jiraiya said.

"Fuck off, old man," Kakashi said.

Jiraiya slapped him on the back of the head. "That's the second time you've said that to me. The third time you get chakra – understand?"

"Yes sir," Kakashi said sulkily.

"I'll be back tomorrow. Try to sleep. I told Tsunade you had a cold. She bought it, again, but I don't know how many times you'll get away with this."

Kakashi didn't answer his knock the next time he visited. He unlocked the door and stepped into a dark house. "Kakashi?" he called.

"In here," he heard from the bedroom.

He found Kakashi in bed, wrapped in every blanket he owned. His teeth chattered.

"Withdrawal getting bad?" Jiraiya asked.

"Yeah," Kakashi said. "Pretty bad. Could you see if I have any more blankets?"

"You have enough blankets," Jiraiya said. "More won't help. You'll just kick them off when you get the hot flashes. Have you eaten yet?"

"I'm not hungry."

"That's not what I asked. You need to eat. You can't afford to lose 20 pounds like last time. Remember how hard it was to hide that, and that was in the winter. You won't get away with it now."

He knew it was getting worse when he heard the toilet flush every couple hours. Kakashi wandered back and forth between his room and the bathroom with his hand over his gut.

About four in the morning Jiraiya got up to take a piss and found Kakashi sitting on the toilet with his head in a bucket vomiting. "Lock the door next time!" Jiraiya said.

Kakashi eventually wandered back to his room. Jiraiya could tell he was losing weight. "You're shooting it out both ends, aren't you?" Jiraiya asked him. He got Kakashi some water so he wouldn't dehydrate.

"I'm going to stay over for a few days and make sure you're ok," Jiraiya said.

He fell asleep on the couch and didn't wake up till morning. Kakashi was lying on the floor in the bathroom, curled into a fetal position. The vomit bucket sat next to him, and he looked up at Jiraiya. "I need help," he said.

Jiraiya sat on the floor next to him. "You really do," he said. "I've never seen you half this bad. I'll see what I can do."

He came back later and gave Kakashi a shot. "What was that?" Kakashi asked.

"Something Tsunade gave me," Jiraiya said. When he saw the panic on Kakashi's face he added, "I had to talk to her. I don't know if anyone's ever died from morphine withdrawals, but I'm worried about you."

"I bet she's pissed," Kakashi said.

"A little, but she's mostly worried. You have people who care about you."

The shot Jiraiya gave him began to kick in. Jiraiya could tell when Kakashi started to feel better because he relaxed and uncurled his body.

"Let's get you into bed," Jiraiya said. He had to help Kakashi to his room, but he slept heavily for the first time in days.

Kakashi woke to find Tsunade standing over him, hands on hips. "Something you want to tell me Kakashi?" she asked.

"I think I have a problem," he said.

"Did the shot help?" she asked.

"Yeah, it helped a lot. I'm not doing this again."

She snorted. "Every junkie says that sooner or later. You're relieved of duty for at least a month, and you'll be reporting for drug testing once a week. You're getting off easy."

"Yes, Tsunade-sama."

"You're lucky you had Jiraiya around, or you might have died of dehydration by now. You look like you're over the worst of it, but you need to put on some weight. You look more like a skeleton than a scarecrow."

"Sorry, Tsunade-sama."

"Just get well, ok? Naruto's starting to ask questions, and we can't keep him in the dark forever. Do you really want to deal with him and Sakura?"

"Oh god no. Naruto would kill me with sadness, and Sakura would just kill me."

She left him weak but recovering. He knew the next time he was injured he'd have to go through it all over again.