Summary: The Decepticons and the Autobots land earlier on Earth by 17 years, and Barricade finds something in a squishy trash receptacle. He decides it'd make a great pet. Starscream is badgered and bullied into letting him keep it, and soon regrets that fact...
:blah: is thoughts.
:Blah: is full bot comming.
:Blah:is when one of the 'drone' partners, such as Frenzy or Sorponok talk to their carrier, though Skorpy usually only says one or two words anyways, being more animalistic...
Earth is a disgusting little rock, Barricade thought to himself as he stalked around in the back alleys of an Earth city. I ALMOST hope the Autobots lose... Bah, what am I processing?
It's that fragged secondary programming. I'll have to run a scan... FRENZY!
Yeah boss?
Run a diagnostic on the seccondary programming sub-routines and re-route any of them back to secondary position if they've crossed with my main programming binary.
On it 'Cade! Found an altmode yet?
No. I've spotted some enforcer type vehicles, but none of them would suit my armor type. I'll more than likely find a different vehicle that WILL mesh with my armor type and just decorate it to look like an enforcer vehicle. Search any human databases for vehicles of my armor type once you've finished with that programming diagnostic, and then we'll have to"
Got it! You were right, some wirse had gotten mixed up after that last fight with the insect. Got ME an Altmode. Ima' goin' with a glitchin' awesome stereo system! Found you one too, it's a called a Shelby mustang GT500. It should fit yous armor type good enough, right?
Frenzy shared a picture of the car in question with his carrier, alongside 3D renderings and versions of the car made to match the design of local 'Enforcer' vehicles.
Good work, Frenz. Barricade told his partner even as he set to growing his armor from his protoform so he could transform into a less conspicuous form. Once the armor had grown, Barricade transformed slowly, feeling the new form out, slipping carefully into it. Now let's go scare some squishies so they stay away from the rendevous point.
With that, the newly transformed cop car/ mustang peeled out of his current hiding spot and onto the highway. As if to prove his idiocy, Starscream had demanded that the redevous point be in a human city. As Scout, Barricade had to find a suitable hiding spot for them to meet and then hail the others from orbit. But first...
Decepticon Scout Barricade hailing Decepticon TIC Soundwave for assistance and report.
A brief humming in his processors and then Soundwave's voice reverberatted through his body.
Soundwave;acknowledges. What is your situation?
I need a city close to my location that the advance team and I can redevous in and be hard to find. What can you get me?
Another brief hum.
City designated 'Las Vegas' is exactly two point 95432 breems from your location at your current rate of speed.
Then inform Starscream I'll be ready in four breems.
Soundwave; acknowledges. Soundwave; out.
Las Vegas was a horrible place, but it had more hiding spots than Starscream had bad ideas, and for that, Barricade was thankful. As he parked himself in an alleyway to wait for the others (having signalled them already, the lights blending in with the Las Vegas sky quite nicely) he began to fall into a light recharge that was soon interupted by a small, piteous mewling noise.
By Primus, what is that noise? It sounds like a dying turbo fox!
Cautiously changing back to his true form, Barricade reached an arm over to the noise's source. It was, his scans told him, a human trash receptacle for waste disposal. So primitave comapred to how they did things back home!
Dragging the green, black topped box over to him, Barricade hooked a clawed digit under the lid and threw it back. Inside, right on top, was a small, malnourished human child.
Probably only a couple of rotations old... Baricade thought, reaching for it gently. Why it's creator would put it in a trash receptacle is beyond me... Frenzy, pop out for a second and help me with this. I've found an abandoned human sparkling.
Frenzy ejected from his host's body and scurried into the trash bin. Barricade gently scooped the child up and scanned him. The little one needed nutrients and liquids but was otherwise unharmed.
A rumbling noise alerted Barricade to the pressence of a tank, and he turned to greet it.
"Brawl," he said, nodding to the tank as it joined him in the alleyway. "I trust your landing went well?"
The tank growled and transformed into its true form. "My trajectory brought me straight into a fragging human nourishment establishment. I got fraggin' squishy bits all up in my joints, and it is NOT enjoyable. Any news from the others?"
"No. I hope Blackout hurries his aft up and gets here before Bonecrusher though. I'd like him here to back me up with this."
"With what," Brawl asked, quite curious. "You got another weird expiriment?"
"In a manner of speaking," Barricade joked, showing the child to his team-mate. "I intend to keep it, but I doubt that Bonecrusher would go for the idea. Nor will Starscream, at any rate, but if I can at least get Blackout's back up, I'll have a better stance. I'd ask you to assist me in this endevour, but I know you like to keep out of these little tussles."
"Can I teach it to pull bits of scrap out of my plating?"
Barricade looked at his friend for a moment, optics shuttering in one of those 'blink... blink' awkward moments before answering with "Um... sure? I was going to teach him to do that anyways, but... sure..."
"Sweet!" Brawl yelled, making his smaller friend really feel weirded out, seeing his large pal the mass of a tank squeeling like a schoolgirl. Not that Barricade knew what a Schoolgirl was...
A rumbling, whooping noise announced the arrival of Blackout, whom had been filled in on the situatioun by Frenzy. Transforming, he held a hand out to Barricade. "Well, let's see the little stinker. And then I'll have to upload some information packets to you about caring for organics properly."
Barricade wordlessly handed the child over to Blackout, knowing it would be perfectly safe with the Rotoror. Blackout had been a scientist before the war, and was famous for his work with organics. Blackout muttered to himself, checking statistics, averages, dowloading everything on humans that he could. When he made sure a child was healthy, he REALLY made sure!
"The little one will need squishy nutrients, which I haven't got on hand, nor can I easily get them. He'll need hand on care for the next couple of joors, which I can't see you being very good at giving, 'Cade." Blackout dissolved into Cybertronian muttering, most likely arguing with himself about something. He'd been doing that a lot ever since he'd gotten his processor taken out for a while on Grelnar 5 about three and a half orns back...
The conversation was interuptted by the arrival of Starscream and Bonecrusher (who had yet to take an altmode, as anything he chose would be rather hard to hide...), and Blackout quickly handed the baby back to Barricade.
"Screewok ta noshe draa?" Bonecrusher said in Cybertronian, questioning what the child was before continuing on to explain that he hadn't gotten any of Earth's languages yet because he had been lightly damaged in his fall.
"It's a squishy youngling," Starscream sneered. "Squish it before it can grow to maturity."
Barricade, Frenzy, Brawl and Blackout all growled in response, Barricade holding the child close to his chest plates, Frenzy chattering away in his stuttering vocalizations at Starscream.
"You fools dare disobey MY orders?" Starscream sneered at them. "I am stronger than all of you, AND I am the Supreme Commander of the Decepticons!"
That last line was just stupid, and Starscream found himself surrounded by weapons from all sides.
"Sker vetch dra aahahh gra!" Bonecrusher growled at Starscream. It translated loosely from Cybertronian into English as "You will NEVER truly lead us, coward!"
After much argument and a few shots being fired off, it was decided that Barricade could keep the human child. Of course, the problem became- how in Primus's name would Barricade get it the help it needed to get healthy? So, on the advice of blackout, Barricade brought the kid to a hospital and dropped him off right outside where anyone could notice him; then he stayed right within scanner range of the hospital until the child was sent to an orphanage- and once the child was old enough to eat solid food, Frenzy went in, grabbed him and off they all went, back to the 'Nemisis' and their fellow Cybertronians.
Of course, this was only the begining of the child's adventures...