A/N: This isn't the kind of fic I usually write and I apologize for the mischaracterization and the overall crappiness of this. I cramped as many prompts as I can in this one bc I'm lazy. The setting is canon era although this feels like a modern au. Anyway, happy reading! :D
P.S. This has already been posted on my tumblr and AO3 account. :)
Booze doesn't come easy in this world and when Auruo Bossard spotted a couple of bottles in the market place, he bought them in a heartbeat.
It's a cold night and everyone decided they wanted a taste of alcohol. They've been saving the drink for an important occasion, like a birthday or the announcement of someone's engagement.
But tonight is special.
No one knows exactly what's so special about this particular night but they all feel it in their bones. It is in the air they breathe. Every breath they take says drinking tonight is right plus it would be fun to loosen up, healthy even, to get distracted from the duties of a soldier once in a while.
So, tonight, Petra Ral did the honors of pouring a glass of iced cold beer to everyone.
"I haven't had sex before," Petra admits sheepishly. Her cheeks, already pink from the alcohol, turned a shade darker.
They have no idea how they came to such a topic. One minute they were talking about horses and who among them could outdrink Pixis and the next thing they know is that they're talking about sex and all of that kinky stuff.
"I haven't -" she stops and takes a swig before continuing.
"I never - "she takes a deep breath, "gave much thought to it. I vowed that I would only have sex with whoever I'm going to marry. I never even had someone special; it's not my fault boys get intimidated by me. I mean, I'm a fucking soldier. I could snap their necks with my bare hands!" she gives a short laugh.
"But ever since I became a soldier, ever since I went out of these walls, ever since I killed a titan, I became unsure of marriage because I was never certain of when I was going to die." she stares at her glass, absentmindedly drawing smiley faces on the condensation.
"But now, I -" she licks her lips, "I want to do it. At least just once. Before I die."
It's not every day they hear a confession, let alone from Petra Ral. The four men have no idea what to say to her, so they remain silent for a while.
She takes the silence as an answer what were you thinking, Ral? You've ruined it, now it's all awkward.
She wolfs down her drink and was about to pour herself another when Auruo wraps an arm around her shoulders and says I'll sleep with you, Petra. much to everyone's horror.
They all know that Auruo has a thing for her and Petra, well, she doesn't really feelanything for him aside from the camaraderie and the constant urge to knock him out due to his obnoxiousness.
She rolls her eyes, "Fuck off, Auruo."
A surprised look flashes across Auruo's face, "But I thought you wanted -"
"Let the lady decide," Eld cuts him off.
Petra gives him a grateful look.
"You just want to have sex with her, don't you, Eld?" Auruo teases and Petra elbows him so hard he almost toppled over.
"No offense, Petra. But I'd rather do it with my girl," Eld says and he refills her glass for her.
"How about you, Gunther?" Auruo smirks at him and Gunther scratches the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable as four sets of eyes look at him expectantly.
"Sorry, Petra. I don't do sex."
She smiles because she already knows. She and Gunther go way back. They were friends since childhood, although Gunther was a year older and enlisted in the Trainee Corps a year ahead of her.
But Auruo is too drunk for his own good and asks, "What about you, Captain?"
Eld curses under his breath, Gunther freezes, and Petra's face drops to her hands and she almost died of embarrassment.
Levi, who has remained silent all evening, looks at her and deadpans, "What do you say, Ral?"
Something in her stomach twists and she feels blood rushing to her cheeks. She bursts out laughing – earning questionable stares from the men around her.
"I want to do it. But not with any of you," she says, hoping desperately that they can't hear her wildly beating heart because Levi just asked you if you would like to have sex with him.
"Bummer," Auruo huffs beside her. Levi gives a tired sigh and refills his glass.
Three continued to jape and boast about the number of titans they've killed, two remained silent the rest of the night. Petra steals glances at Levi while Levi tries hard to pretend that he doesn't notice her eyes and her beautifully flushed face, tries hard to not to lean in and stop her from bothering her lip by kissing her.
They call it night when Auruo started snoring. Eld and Gunther took him back to his room, leaving Levi and Petra to clean up.
Levi walks her to her room. They don't speak. Sometimes, the silence is all you need to make up for the lack of words to say.
They reach her door.
He bids her goodnight but stays in front of her; waiting for her to stop looking at her toes and start looking at him.
She is fidgeting with her hands and biting her lip and this is how he knows that she is thinking of something – of what, he himself cannot tell.
"What is it, Petra?"
She takes a deep breath to try and calm down her rabbit heart, "Will you be my first, Levi?"
Tomorrow. Come at midnight .
She dismisses the thought. The alcohol gave her courage last night but it was still a foolish thing to ask him. The Captain is too busy with his duties and with the planning of how to end this war against the Titans to agree to sleep with her.
But what if he really said that? What if he really agreed?
She groans and shakes her head furiously.
Don't keep your hopes up, silly girl. The Captain would never!
She convinces herself that she is just hangover and delusional.
She needed coffee.
She fights dirty, using her nails and teeth to beat him in training but something is not rightabout the way she trains with him today - sparring with her was never this easy.
And this is how he knows that she is distracted.
"What's wrong today?" Gunther helps her up. She makes a face as she flexes her arm, a bruise certain to appear on it the next day.
"Huh?" she wipes at the sweat on her forehead.
"You're distracted. What's wrong?"
She is. She can't get it out of her mind.
Was it a dream? But what if it's real?
But she won't tell Gunther about her dreams and fantasies, "Nothing. I was just thinking of writing a letter to my father."
She lies and prays that Gunther won't see right through her.
He can tell that she's lying but if she doesn't want to talk about it, he won't force her to. She's one of his dearest friends and he respects her privacy and her decisions. So instead, Gunther shrugs and calls it enough training for the day.
There's a knock on her door just as she was about to step into the shower. She wraps a towel around her and walks towards her door barefoot, her hair coming off the lazy ponytail.
She opens it just enough to peek outside, her eyes widen and her breath catches in her throat.
"Hi, Captain. What brings you here? I was just about to take a shower. Is there anything you want?" the words come out of her mouth faster than the beating of her heart and she wonders how on earth could that be possible.
Levi stands there; looking calm and collected as always despite his heart is racing just as fast as hers.
He clears his throat and tugs at his collar, "I came by to remind you of our, uh, meeting. Don't be late."
She freezes and catches herself before her jaw drops, "I, uh, yeah. I haven't forgotten. I – I won't be late."
"Good," Levi says before turning on his heels and walking down the hallway.
She sits down on her bed as if in a trance and stares at the bricked wall, still in shock from what had just happened.
So it's true then. The Captain did agree to sleep with her. It must have been at least an hour before she finally moved.
Her brain is fried. She needed to clear her thoughts.
She curses under her breath and walked to the shower.
She lathers the soap over her entire body and hums to herself. The hot water calms her nerves and makes her forget. But the smell of soap and how clean she feels made her think of Levi and what she told him and she feels butterflies in her stomach. And, as if on cue, her mind becomes flooded with images of Levi kissing her neck, Levi whispering sweet nothings in her ear, Levi running his hands over her body, his fingers, his tongue, and his body on hers.
She flushes scarlet and turns the dial of the shower to cold, the sudden drop in temperature caused gooseflesh to appear on her arms. She slaps her face, calm yourself, Petra.
But she can't calm down. For the love of God, she just can't.
She is dressed now and pacing around her room. Her heart thumping widely in her chest as it gets closer and closer to midnight.
I don't think i can do this.
Her breathing is heavy and she is covered in cold sweat.
I can't do it.
She sits down on the edge on her bed and stands right back up. She walks back and forth to her door and the window. She's anxious and the butterflies in her stomach only make her want to throw up.
I can't do it.
She bites her nails and sits back down, her knee bouncing up and down as she watches the seconds tick by.
She holds her breath as the minute hand overlaps with the hour hand and her heart is beating so fiercely it's making her dizzy. The sound is so loud that she is certain that Levi can hear it all the way in his room.
She takes a deep breath and tells herself that she can do it. She's a Ral, she can do anything.
There's a knock on the door.
She jumps and her heart leapt into her throat, her whole body growing cold and her stomach doing somersaults.
She looks at the clock and curses.
12:27.
She walks over to her door and takes a deep breath to try and calm herself. But it's all in vain; her heart won't stop beating madly in her chest.
She opens her door and standing before her is Levi, looking nervous, although not as much as her.
He steps closer and Petra opens her door wider, stepping away from behind her door.
She opens her mouth to speak, "I'm sorry. I don't – I don't think I can do it. I'm really sorry."
He steps even closer and kisses the crown of her head, "It's alright. You were very brave."
She caught his wrist just as he was about to leave, "Maybe next time?"
He nods, "Sweet dreams, Petra Ral."
THE END.
A/N: Levi came to her bedroom bc he was too excited and can't wait for her lmao what a loser