A/N: Ok, so this is just so random thing that i thought up. I tried to keep everyone in character, but if you have read any of my other parody one-shots, you'd know that they're usely out-of-character (but only for pure fun). So anyways, i do hope you enjoy this story and remember, this is just for fun and is not serious.

Disclaimer: i do not own the Outsiders or the Wizard of Oz.

The Wizard of Tulsa

"Ponyboy!" my track coach called me. I walked beside him and he clapped his hand on my shoulder. "Pony, I want you to meet Joseph." He pointed to a boy who was standing just in front of him. "Joseph's new to Tulsa and has joined the track team."

I looked at Joseph. He was tall, with dark hair and dark eyes. His lips pressed in a thin line. He did not look happy.

Coach continued to talk to me. "I want you to hang around with Joseph for a bit, you know, show him the ropes."

"But why me, coach?" I asked. I didn't really feel like hanging out with this guy.

"Because, you're one of my best runners and one of the nicest guys on the team."

"Alright, fine," I said. Coach smiled and then walked over to another teacher to talk with him.

I turned my attention to Joseph and held out my hand. "Hi, I'm Ponyboy."

Joseph laughed. "Ponyboy? What kind of a name is that?"

I was taken back. "Well-"

"And don't think," Joseph said, interrupting me, "that you're the greatest runner on this team, because you're not. I am."

I didn't really know what to say to this. He was being extremely rude.

"So, just stay out of my way and out of my spotlight." And with that, Joseph walked away. What a Soc.

**

A few days later, we had our first track meet. Joseph was there, of course, and still wasn't looking very happy. He even took a few minutes out of his stretches to warn me about staying out of his light. I was confused; weren't we supposed to be on the same team?

On a brighter note, Darry and Soda were there to watch me run. Johnny was there too, and so was Two-Bit, Steve (though he was only here 'cause Soda was) and even Dally (though I still don't know why).

Anyway, I wasn't about to let this stupid Joseph guy push me around, and I sure as hell wasn't going to let him run better then me. No, I was going to run the hardest I ever had.

After we were done with our stretches, we stood in our track positions. Unfortunately, Joseph was standing beside me.

"Stay out of my way, Horsey-Boy."

"It's Ponyboy."

"Same thing."

I was gonna say something back to him, but the gun sounded and everyone started running. Joseph was a few steps in front of me, so I pushed my legs hard and within a few seconds, I was passing him and taking first place.

I knew that he was probably pissed and was going to try even harder to pass me, but I just kept running faster. I wasn't about to let him beat me.

The race was almost over, and I was still in the lead, but out of the corner of my eye I could see Joseph gaining speed behind me. I started to run faster, but Joseph was still getting closer.

RUN FASTER!!! I told myself, but my legs wouldn't pick up speed.

Seconds later, Joseph was beside me, and I mean right beside me. He was so close to me that our feet were practically touching.

"Slow down," Joseph said, his breathing was heavy.

"No, way," I told me.

His face grew angry. "Fine." And then the next thing I knew, his foot came up and kicked mine, sending me toward the ground in a loud Thump.

**

When I opened my eyes, I was laying on the ground. I started to sit up slowly, knowing that if I got up too fast, my head would be in even more pain then it should. But to my surprise, my head felt fine.

Funny, I thought, I thought for sure that I had hit the ground really hard.

I stood up and looked around for my brothers and the rest of the gang, and maybe even Joseph so that I could beat him up. But no one was there. Not one single person. And to make things worse, I wasn't even in Tulsa anymore.

I can't believe it! I'm all alone here.

"Darry?" I called out. "Soda?" No answer. "Johnny? Two-Bit?" Still no answer.

"Where is everyone?" I can't believe that they just left me.

"Ponyboy?" someone called me. I turned around and saw Sodapop standing there.

"Soda? Where is everyone."

"Everyone?" he asked confused.

"You know, the gang, and Darry, our brother."

"I don't have a brother," Soda said simply.

"Yes you do!" I yelled at him. "I'm your brother and so is Darry."

"I don't have any brothers," Soda repeated. "I can't. I'm a witch."

My mouth dropped. "What?"

"Yup. I'm the good witch of the East."

"No your not!"

Soda sighed. "Just play along and stay in character."

I cocked an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

"This isn't real, it's a dream."

"A dream?"

Soda nodded. "Yup, a dream based on The Wizard of Oz."

"Are you serious?"

"Don't look at me, Pony, this is your dream, remember?"

"Ok," I said. "But, shouldn't you be the good witch of the North, not the East?"

"No," Soda said matter-o-factly. "Us greasers are from the East-side, so therefore I'm the good witch of the East."

"Ok, whatever you say. But just one question; where am I?"

"Windrixville."

"Why?"

"I have no idea," Soda said. "Now, look down at your feet."

I did. I was wearing red converses.

"What are these for?" I asked.

"Beats me," Soda said. "But I do know that you need them to get home."

"Oh right, I remember. I have to go see the Wizard of Oz."

"Actually, you have to go see the Wizard of Tulsa."

"The Wizard of Tulsa?"

"Well we can't make everything like the movie."

"But I though this was a dream?"

"You can still get charged with plagiarism if it's a dream."

I gave him a look. "…..Sure." I thought for a moment. "Shouldn't Toto be here?" I asked.

"Nah," Soda said. "He was supposed be, but then he got sick."

"Oh."

"GIVE ME THOSE SHOES!!!" someone yelled. I turned to see Joseph.

"Oh my God!" Soda screamed. "It's the evil witch of the West!!!"

"Give me those shoes," Joseph repeated.

"No way!" I yelled at him.

"Ponyboy," Soda said to me, "RUN!" And with that, I took off.

Five minutes later, I stopped running and looked behind me. Joseph were no where to be seen. Only problem was, I didn't know where I was, or how to get home. All I knew was that I was standing on a train track and that there was a forest on the other side.

So either I can get hit by a train, or get eaten by a wild animal.

I chose train.

I started walking on the tracks, not knowing where they would lead me, when a figure stepped out from the trees. It was Tim Shepard.

"Tim?" I asked surprised. "What are you doing here."

He shrugged. "Me and my gang got cast as the munchkins."

Just then, the rest of Tim's gang came out from the forest. They all didn't look too happy that they were pretending to be munchkins. One person, in particular, looked even more upset then everyone else. I realized that it was because that person was Steve.

"Hey, Steve," I said to him.

"Hey Ponyboy." Steve walked over to me. "Just so you know, I hate you."

"Why?"

"Because I got stuck being a munchkin with Tim Shepard."

"Why didn't you just be a different character?" I asked.

Steve pouted. "Because all the other characters were already taken."

"I'm sorry," I said, even though I wasn't. "But, do you know how I can get home?"

Tim came up to me. "Just follow the yellow brick road."

I looked at the ground and then back up at Tim. "There is no yellow brick road."

Tim looked down and blinked. "Oh….so there isn't."

Steve sighed. "Just walk along the train track until you get to Tulsa."

"But that will take days!" I said.

Steve shook his head. "No it won't. You're forgetting that this is a dream. It should only take about twenty minutes."

My spirit lighten. "Oh, ok. That's not too bad."

"Good," Steve said. "Now go. I want to get out of this dream."

He started to walk away. "Wait! What am I supposed to do when I get to Tulsa?"

"Go find the Wizard. Duh."

"But where is he?"

Steve thought for a minute. "Try Buck's." Then he went back into the forest, along with Tim and his gang.

I started to walk, when Soda came running up to me. "Hey Pony," he said, out of breath. "Sorry it took me so long. I had to get rid of Joseph."

"Yeah, what was up with him?"

"He wanted your shoes so that you could never get home and so that he could be the fastest runner ever."

"I see," I said. "So are you going to come to Tulsa with me?"

Soda shrugged. "Might as well." Then we walked down the track.

A few minutes later, we heard someone coming towards us. I braced myself to see Joseph, but instead, it was only Two-Bit walking around drunkenly.

"Hey Ponyboy." He waved over at me.

"Two-Bit!" Soda said to him. "You're not supposed to know his name.

"Oh right!" Two-Bit cleared his throat and then came up to me. "Hello person I do not know. My name is Two-Bit, what is yours?"

"Ponyboy," I said dully.

"Well, it's very nice to meet you," he grinned at me. "And in case you didn't know, I don't have a brain."

"Really?" I asked sarcastically. He nodded.

We stood there for a few moments, not saying anything when Soda nudged Two-Bit.

"Oh, right," Two-Bit said. He turned to me. "Can I come with you to see the Wizard of Tulsa?"

"You're not supposed to know about that!" Soda told him.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot," he said. "I mean, where are you going?"

"I'm going to see the Wizard of Tulsa. Would you like to come along?" I asked.

"Sure," Two-Bit said happily. "I need to get a brain."

"You sure do."

We all started walking again and, like the first time, a few minutes later, we say someone.

This time it was Darry.

"Hello, I'm Darry," he said to me. "May I asked who you are?"

I sighed. Was this going to happen through this whole dream?

"It's me, Ponyboy," I said. "Let me guess, you don't have a heart?"

"Oh, he's good," Two-Bit exclaimed.

"It's true," Darry said. "I don't know how to love."

"Well that's a shame," Soda said, sounding heartbroken.

"Do you want to come with us?" Two-Bit asked.

"Where are you going?" Darry asked.

"Oh, like you don't know," I said. "We're going to see the Wizard of Tulsa."

"Ok, I'll come." Darry came over to stand beside me. "I need the wizard to give me a heart."

"Yeah, that's nice," I said and continued walking.

The next few minutes were really annoying because Two-Bit kept asking stupid questions and Darry kept complaining about having no heart. I was going to yell at them to shut up, but before I could, I heard someone crying.

It must be Johnny, I thought. And sure enough, just up ahead, Johnny was sitting on the ground crying.

"Johnny," I said, sitting down beside him. "What's wrong?"

"I have no courage."

"I figured that much."

"Hey Johnny," Two-Bit said. "This is Ponyboy. He's going to see the Wizard of Tulsa. Want to come?"

Johnny looked out at me. "Can I?"

"Sure you can," I said and helped him up. I really wanted to go home, so if it meant playing along with this stupid dream and having everyone tagging along, I was all for it.

When we finally got into Tulsa, I turned to Soda. "There aren't going to be any flying monkeys or anything here, is there?"

Soda shook his head. "Nah, having flying monkeys would just make this dream longer and the rest of us don't want to be here much longer."

"Yeah," Darry said, "it's true."

"That's ok with me," I said. "I want to get home too. So let's go find Buck's and get the Wizard to end this dumb dream."

"Agreed," Johnny said.

It didn't take long to get to Buck's. In no time at all, we were all standing outside on the porch.

"Man, I don't think this is such a hot idea," Johnny said. "What if he gets mad?"

"Who cares?" Two-Bit asked.

"I do."

"Look, Johnny," I said, "you don't have to come if you don't want too."

"No, I'll come. But only 'cause I want some courage."

"There's the spirit," Soda said.

"Here goes nothing," I said and then knocked on the door.

"Who goes there?" a voice behind the door said. It was Dallas.

"Hey Dally, it's us."

"I'm not Dally."

Great, Dally was actually playing the part of the wizard. "Cut it out Dal. I know it's you and I just want to go home."

Dally opened the door. "Well sorry for me trying to do this right," he sad angrily. "This is the last time I do anything for you. Dream or no dream." He stepped aside and let all of us in.

"We're is everyone?" I asked.

"Hello? It's a dream," Soda said. "We got rid of everyone who didn't have a part."

"Right, I keep forgetting that part."

"You guys want a beer?" Dally asked.

"Hey," Two-Bit said, "Dally's not staying in character."

"And I'm not going too."

"Come on Dal," Soda chimed in. "You have too."

"Forget it." Dally handed a beer to everyone. "I'm not going to play some stupid Wizard of Tulsa."

Two-Bit's eyes widen. "But you have too."

"Look, you guys can act like the characters all you want, but I'm not going too."

"Fine," Soda said. "Be that way."

"I will." Then Dally turned to me. "Alright Pony, I'm gonna tell you how to get home-"

"NO!" Soda yelled. "You can't tell him yet?"

"And why the hell not?"

"Because the wicked witch of the West hasn't come in yet."

"You mean Joseph?" I asked.

"No," Soda said through gritted teeth, "I mean the wicked witch of the West."

"Hey, I have a question," Dally asked. "How come you guys are making me stay in character, but Soda can change his character from the witch of the North to the witch of the East?"

"BECAUSE GREASERS ARE FROM THE EAST NOT FROM THE NORTH!" Soda screamed.

"…..Sorry for asking."

Soda composed himself and turned to me. "Now Pony, Joseph is going to come in any moment and you must defeated him and then you can go home."

"Why can't I just go home now?" I asked.

Soda sighed. "Because I'm playing the good witch, which means that I'm in charge and I say that we're going to do this thing right."

"But it's only a dream."

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT." Then Soda stormed out of the room.

"…..Well, that was interesting," Two-Bit said.

Just then, the front door opened. "It's Joseph," Johnny said and ran to hide behind Dally. "Save me."

"Quick," Two-Bit said to me. "Open your beer."

"Why?"

"Because, we don't have any water and beers the next best thing." I didn't argue. I opened the beer.

Joseph came in and looked at all of us. "Um…Steve's outside."

"WHAT?!?!?!?!" Soda screamed from the other room. He ran back into the room and stood at the door. "Steve, what the HELL are you doing here?? You're supposed to be in Munchkin Land."

Steve was at the door now. "But I wanted to see Joseph get his ass kicked."

"His ass is not going to get kicked, it's going to get melted."

"So, can I stay?" Steve asked.

"Fine." Soda pulled him inside and closed the door. "But stand in the back so it doesn't seem as obvious that you're here."

"Can we just get this over with now?" Dally asked.

Soda looked around the room. "Yes. I think we're ready now." Then he gave Joseph a little push towards me.

"Give me you're shoes," Joseph said to me.

"No," I said back and then poured beer on him.

"No!!! I'm melting, melting, melting, melting."

"Um, no you're not," Two-Bit said.

Joseph looked down at himself. "Oh, right, I'm not." He looked over at Soda. "Can I just go?"

Soda threw his hands up in frustration. "Fine, do whatever. I don't friggin' care anymore."

"Ok, thanks." And with that, Joseph left.

"Can I go now?" I asked.

"Yes, right now," Dally said.

"Soda?" I waked over to him.

"Why do you car what I have to say?" he asked. "You guys think it's stupid anyway."

I sighed. I didn't want to make Soda mad, even if he was only a dream right now. "Look, we promise to….attempt to do what you want. Ok?"

"Fine," Soda said, "All I want you guys to do is to end it right."

"And how do we do that?" Dally asked.

"By giving everyone what they came here for."

"Fine." Dally walked over to me. "Ok, all you have to do is-"

"Starting with Two-Bit," Soda told him.

Dally fought back his urge to yell at Soda. He walked over to Two-Bit. "Ok listen. You've already got a brain, you're just always drunk that it just doesn't seem have one."

Two-Bit's eyes brighten. "It's true."

Dally walked over to Darry. "And you. You've already got a heart, but you'd rather yell at your brother instead of taking the time to listen to him and whatnot."

Darry's eyes watered with joy. "It's true."

Dally came up to Johnny. "As for you, you have courage. But because you got beat up, you've become more scared and stopped using your courage."

Johnny nodded. "It's true."

Dally looked back at Soda. "Good enough."

Soda shrugged. "It was ok."

"Good." Dally turned to me. "Now, I want you to smack your feet together three times and say 'I'm stupid'"

I looked at him surprised. "Really?"

Dally laughed a little. "Nah, I'm just screwing with you. But seriously, so that we can all get out of here, smack your feet together three times and say 'there's no place like home.'"

I hit my feet together once, twice, a third time. "There's no place like home." Then I closed my eyes and then opened them. I was still in the same place. "Did it work?"

"Nope," Two-Bit said.

Dally sighed. "Guess it's time for plan B." He walked over to the couch and pulled a bat from under it.

"Are you serious?" I asked.

"Don't worry," Dally said, coming back over to me, "this is just a dream, so it won't hurt, even though when you wake up you'll still be in pain from your fall."

I was going to try to talk Dal out of hitting me, but before I got the chance, the bat made contact with the side of my head.

**

I opened my eyes and found myself in me and Soda's bed. All the gang was there.

"Hey guys," Johnny said. "Pony's up."

Darry came racing to my side. "Pony are you ok?"

I nodded and felt a stabbing pain in my head.

"You sure fell pretty hard," Soda told me.

"I had a weird dream," I said, not even realizing that I had said it. "And all of you were in it. Even Tim Shepard."

"Really?" Two-Bit asked, a bit surprised.

Dally walked over to me. "Hey kid. Guess who's here?"

I sat up and saw Joseph standing in the doorway. "What do you want?" I asked, trying to sound really rude.

Joseph looked a bit scared. "Dally said that if I didn't apologize to you, that he hit me so hard I won't be able to sit ever again." Dally started laughing. "So sorry."

I lay back down. "Um, ok."

Dally looked over at Joseph. "What are you still doing here? GET OUT!" And with that, Joseph ran.

"So Ponyboy." Two-Bit sounded amused as he said this. "What was that dream of yours about?"

"Yeah," Steve chimed in. "I'd really like to know.

I looked at everyone. There was no way in hell that I was telling them about my dream.

"I'm kind of tired," I said and then closed my eyes and pretended to fall asleep. They all left and closed the door quietly. I was glad; I was still really tired and wanted to get more sleep.

I just hoped that I didn't dream anymore.

The End

Well that was all. I hope you liked it. Please review!! :D