Disclaimer: InuYasha and company belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I am borrowing her characters amateurish attempt at humor fanfiction.
Warning: Mild OOC
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No one had expected Naraku to be defeated so quickly. Midoriko claimed that a hanyou of his caliber shouldn't have lasted a week, but then everyone secretly wished that that Midoriko would keep more of her opinions to herself.
Two weeks prior to the final battle, Kikyo and Kohaku had wandered their way within the vicinity of the InuYasha-faction's campsite, and had joined them for a meal of ramen. Such familiarity would have been unthinkable in the past, but Kohaku's companionship had done much for the personality of the undead priestess. She smiled occasionally, and Kagome was even able to engage her in a conversation.
Unsurprisingly, Kikyo and Kagome found themselves very much on the same wavelength, and their discussion about the Shikon Jewel led them to a simultaneous mental leap. In the spirit of scientific investigation they decided to attempt communication with Midoriko's soul, which lay dormant in the jewel shards.
They succeeded beyond their wildest expectations. The two mikos had hoped that by combining their powers they could merely speak with their predecessor, but the untrained and overly enthusiastic Kagome inadvertently caused a resurrection.
A stocky, middle aged woman, dressed in the traditional garb of a shrine maiden, rose out of the campfire and hovered for a minute above the flames. Her hair was loosely pinned up, and heavily streaked with grey. Finally, she opened her eyes and stepped down onto the ground. Her gaze darted around the clearing until they fell upon their target. "Kirara!"she cried, as the cat leapt into her arms.
"Midoriko-sama?" Mirkou breathed in wonderment.
Midoriko cast him a sharp glance. "The answer is NO, monk." She had wide eyes and surprisingly delicate features; she had probably been rather pretty when she was younger. However, her flashing eyes and firmly set mouth spoke of an overwhelmingly strong personality, and the creases in her face seemed too determined to be called something so grandmotherly as "wrinkles".
Miroku visibly gulped. "I would never dream of it, madam".
"I'm sure", the older priestess muttered. She turned to the twin startled countenances of Kagome and Kikyo. "It certainly took you girls long enough. Together, you might even make a halfway decent fighting force. However, that little outburst from YOU, young lady, was absolutely unacceptable." Kagome shrank under Midoriko's glare as the miko continued her tirade. "I will have to have a talk with Kaede, because you've known about your abilities for over a year now, and the lack of training you've received is simply appalling. Someone has been very irresponsible, and I've yet to decide whom."
"What the HELL is going on!" An irate InuYasha was now on his feet, bristling with distrust and anger.
Midoriko didn't shrink under his golden eyed glare, or even attempt to stare him down. Instead, she took two steps in his direction and reached up to swipe him across the head. "You can't imagine how long I've wanted to do that. I despise profanity; when you are around me you will keep a civil tongue in your head, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"
As it turned out, InuYasha didn't understand, so Midoriko purified him. A day or two trapped in human form did wonders for his manners, and the group marched their cowed and regimented way to Naraku's lair. InuYasha finally gave up sulking when he witnessed the fearsome miko telling off Sesshoumaru .
"This Sesshoumaru will not be intimidated!"
"Young man, you are not nearly old enough to speak in the third person."
It was riotously funny, and after that even InuYasha resigned himself to the inevitable. Shippo couldn't cope; kitsune and tyranny were like oil and water. Within days, he ran off to join Kouga's wolf tribe.
Two weeks after the botched séance, Naraku was cornered, defeated in fifteen minutes, and then Midoriko was lecturing Kagura on the virtue of modesty. Midoriko claimed that his fortress had been pathetically hidden, and " was practically in plain sight". Somehow it seemed…anti-climactic.
There was simply no comparison between the abilities of Kagome and Kikyo and Midoriko—the legendary priestess was in an entirely different league. Apparently she'd been almost the entire source of power for the Jewel of Four Souls ("The Jewel of One Soul and Three Worthless Layabouts" was what Midoriko called it) and after she was brought back to life, it was reduced to nothing more than a lucky charm.
InuYasha escaped to Hell with Kikyo at the first opportunity. With the presence of an omniscient chaperone, Kagome was unable to enact any of her schemes of seduction that she'd been planning to ensure that InuYasha stayed in her life. She consoled herself that his retreat had been less of a romantic decision and more of a desperate measure, but was still torn between resentment and heartbreak. Kirara appeared to have a great deal of affection for her former partner, but even she removed herself from Midoriko's sphere of organization by leaving with Miroku and Sango, who were getting married and settling down as far away as possible. When the monk and exterminator said their final goodbyes to Kagome, they hugged her fiercely and instructed her to visit, should ever find herself in Feudal Era Hokkaido.
Kagome was forlorn, but busy, during the month that she spent following Midoriko around the countryside in an unenthusiastic apprenticeship. When her teacher finally pronounced her competent, Kagome returned home and sealed the well behind her. After all, she now had the skills to open it again whenever she wanted.
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Ten years later, Kagome was a full time student at Tokyo Women's Medical University and a part time Shrine Maiden. In spiritual circles, her ability at exorcisms was known to be unrivaled, and in clinical rotations she would take every opportunity to "cheat" a bit and heal patients with her spiritual powers, or at least ease their pain. Twice she had vacationed to Hokkaido, opened up a temporal portal and spent a week cooing over Miroku and Sango's many children. Her life was hectic but comparatively peaceful, when she unexpectedly encountered a familiar face.
Kagome had been visiting a shrine on the coast to help put down the particularly recalcitrant spirit of a drowned woman when she came across a peculiar statue that guarded the front entrance. It had dog ears. She did a double take coming into the shrine, and paused to study it fondly on her way out after she had finished the exorcism.
It was standing in a defensive battle posture. It strongly resembled the inu-youkai hanyou of her youth, but with a few salient differences. The hakama were not tied to create the balloon effect, and instead fell loose around the statue's ankles like a modern Aikido uniform. Instead of the distinctive fire-rat, it wore a simple kimono and thigh-length, open haori. The outstretched sword was a katana instead of the bizarre youkai fang that InuYasha has wielded. However, the long hair, ears, and wide eyes were the same, as were the fangs and cursed rosary…
Kagome did a second double take. The cursed rosary was the same, and this wasn't a statue of just any inu-youkai hanyou, but of InuYasha himself. If it was even a statue…Eyes narrowed, she tapped it on the side of the head and extended her consciousness. The soul contained within the statue stirred.
Midoriko hadn't covered this in her instructions, but Kagome was familiar with the Greek myth of Galatea, and could make an educated guess. Calling up all of the power within her, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed the statue, hoping that the owners of the shrine wouldn't catch her ostensibly acting very silly. The statue warmed to her touch. The non-sword arm came up to wrap around her, and the statue kissed her back. When it released her a long moment later, it was flesh instead of stone.
"Deja-vu", InuYasha remarked, referring to the only other time they'd kissed, or the last time he'd woken up from an enchanted slumber, or perhaps both. "Hello, Kagome."
They hugged again, and Kagome found tears in her eyes when she tried to glare at him. He put the katana into the sheath at his waist. "I ought to 'sit' you for…oh, sorry", Kagome paused when the hanyou went crashing to the floor.
"GODdamn it", Inuyasha swore, picking himself up. "I didn't need that part of history to repeat itself."
"You're mouth certainly hasn't gotten any cleaner", Kagome muttered. "Just how long were you asleep for, this time?"
"I dunno", Inuyasha said as he brushed his incongruously black and grey clothes off. "A hundred years or so? A hundred and fifty?"
Kagome rolled her eyes and ran a hand lightly over his head. He blinked as his hair turned black and the ears disappeared. He touched his now invisible ears gingerly, and gave Kagome an impressed and speculative appraisal. "Midoriko trained me", she said by way of explanation.
"She isn't here, is she? I seriously hope she didn't rub off on you."
Kagome grabbed his hand, and led him down to the road. She wanted to be long gone before the shrine owners realized she'd abducted their guardian. "No, of course not, and not too much, I don't think. But I want to hear everything right now, Young Man, and no nonsense about it. Why are you not in Hell?"
InuYasha laughed at her attempt to imitate Midoriko's stentorian tone, and complied as he kept a wary eye on the busy traffic. Deja-vu yet again—it had been centuries since he last had walked hand in hand with Kagome down a sidewalk in an unfamiliar, modern Tokyo, but it felt like only a day had passed. "First of all, Hell was amazing", he began. "Nothing like I'd expected-- Kikyo was right, it's incredibly relaxing." He heard a barely audible, skeptical grunt from his companion, but continued. "Seriously, I worked out practically all of the crap going on in my head from my childhood in the century before Sesshoumaru resurrected us."
Kagome started laughing, and pulled him down to sit on a bench at a bus stop. It wasn't her birthday, this time, but the fates had just given her the best present of her life. She couldn't stop smiling, and was pleased to note that InuYasha wore a bemused, silly-looking grin, as well. "Sesshoumaru resurrected you?"
"Yeah, the asshole. Anyway, Kirara found me, so after Kikyo fixed up his possessed offspring, I'd decided to hang around in the mortal realm for a while longer and check up on Miroku and Sango's descendants. "
"What happened to your sword and fire-rat?" The bus pulled up. Kagome paid for them both, and the couple found themselves a seat in the back.
"Fire-rat fur can't take Hellfire, apparently. They both melted off right away. And then not too long ago, Shippo came along and turned me into a statue. Brat thought it was funny."
"Shippo turned you into a statue to be funny? And didn't turn you back to gloat?" Kagome asked in disbelief.
"Um, there was a girl involved." Kagome dropped his hand and looked out the window. "Give me some credit, Kagome. I wasn't interested in her; my wife hadn't been dead for more than a decade. I just disapproved of the match, and Shippo got mad. Seriously, the kit's changed a lot; you wouldn't recognize him."
"You were married? Wait, was Kikyo still around?"
"Um, no. It was another human woman."
"You know, I was so upset for so long while you were being psychoanalyzed in Hell. My best friend ran off to die, supposedly forever. I really liked you, I would have stayed with you, and I would have been the best girlfriend ever."
"Keh, you'd have probably sat me all the time."
"Damn straight, but I'd have kissed it better, too."
Inuyasha grinned at her. Kagome still looked slightly pissed, and somewhere between laughter and tears, but at least she was making eye contact again. "I know, and I wanted that, too. I really didn't think the whole going to Hell thing through. If I'd realized I wouldn't see you again for centuries, I probably wouldn't have gone. I'm sorry." He had lost her once, and it had been entirely his fault. It was worth an apology, and even some groveling, to not lose her again. He managed to recapture her hand, and she didn't pull away.
"It's okay", Kagome relented, wiping at her eyes. Not crying… She was too pleased to have him back to stay angry. "I did move on with my life, and without you around, I actually finished high school and university. I even sort of have a boyfriend now."
"Please tell me it's not that Hobo-person…"
"No, it's not. He wasn't interesting before I met you, and he certainly wasn't interesting after. One of the other interns at the hospital buys dinner sometimes."
"Keh."
Kagome led him off of the bus, and down a far more familiar sidewalk. "So what ever happened with Kikyo?"
"Oh, that." Inuyasha sounded disgusted, almost sullen. "She fell in love with Sesshoumaru after he resurrected us. They spent the rest of her life staring into each other's eyes, or something. "
"This is probably petty, so I'll never say it again, but InuYasha…I told you so."
"Keh! Stupid wench. You told me Kikyo was trouble, you never told me she was going to elope with soulless-asshole Sesshoumaru."
Giggling, Kagome abandoned his hand to link her arm with his as they approached the shrine. "Oh, be quiet and don't make me say it. If you're nice, I'll make you some Ramen and we can catch up, and you can tell me about all of the details. My mother will be happy to see you. I had a date tonight, but I should probably call it off for the occasion. Mom will probably want to go out for dinner."
"After we're done talking, we need to find Shippo", InuYasha said. "He grew up into such a punk; I need to make sure he hasn't been stupid and gotten into any serious trouble, so I can drown him in the ocean. The statue thing was not funny."
"Yes it was", Kagome interrupted.
Arm in arm, and arguing as per usual, the two friends vanished into the shrine.
The End
AN: Reviews and criticismare bothwonderful things! If you liked it, hated it, or caught a grammatical mistake or awkward phrase, please let me know!