Disclaimer: I do not own "Me without you", nor do I own the characters in this story. I own the plot and nothing else.

It's just you and me and there's no one around

Troy and I was sitting at our secret rooftop garden. The noise from the students who were leaving the school was heard from the parking lot. But we did not hear them. It was just him and I. Me and him. Nothing else. Only the two of us, and no one else was around here. We did not hear anyone either. Just us.

I feel like I'm hanging by a thread, it's a long way down
I've been trying to breathe, but I'm fighting for air
I'm at an all time low with no place to go

Here I was in my bed, crying. Trying to hang onto my life. Fighting for air, trying to breathe. When I came home from school, I had found my mother crying in the kitchen. I asked her, what has happened. She looked at me.

"Oh my dear," she said and whipped her tears and came to me and hugged me tight.

"Mom, what is wrong?" I asked her worried. Then it hit me, my grandmother had been sick for two years because of cancer. I looked at my mother, "Grandma?"

My mother nodded, "yes, sweetie, grandma is dead." The tears felt from her eyes, "Dad is on his way home. I called him right after I ended the call with Uncle Jacob." Once again she hugged me tight.

"No, no, no! She cannot be dead!" I cried.

"Baby, she is," my mother said with a heartbreaking voice as the tears ran down her face.

I ran upstairs slammed my door shut, and fell onto my bed crying. I had no place to go, or yes I had, I could go to Troy's, but he was at practice. He would be out of practice in an hour, and then he would come to my place. He would find me here crying.

But you're always there when everything falls apart
And it seems like the world is crashing at my feet
You like me the best, when I'm a mess
When I'm my own worst enemy

An hour later I heard the doorbell ring. My father had come home half an hour ago, he had been in my room to talk to me, he had held my tight, and told me that everything would be okay. But I refused to trust him. Nothing could be okay without my grandmother! I did not believe my father. I just wanted Troy! Nothing else but Troy!

My mother opened the door. I could hear her greet Troy "Hi Troy, Gabi is in her room." I could tell by her voice that she was still crying.

"Hi Maria, is everything okay?" I heard Troy's concerned voice.

"I think it is best you just go up and talk to Gabi, she needs you, my dear," my mother said.

"Yeah, she does," I heard my father's voice.

I cried my eyes out; soon Troy would be in my room finding me crying on my bed.

I heard someone run up the stairs and then my door went open and closed again. I looked over at the door to find Troy looking at me.

"Troy," I cried and ran to him.

He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight as I let the tears fell.

"Babe, what has happened?" he asked me softly as he lifted me up and carried me to my bed and sat down with me in his lap.

"My… my… grandma…" I could not say it. The tears fell harder from my eyes now.

Troy nodded understanding; he knew my grandmother was sick. We had been at her place for holiday this summer, she had just loved Troy! She said to me that she wished that she could watch us get older together, and she really hoped that we would get married. And so did I. He was the best!

"Baby, is she gone?" he asked me softly.

I nodded against his chest and cried even harder.

Troy held me even tighter, like he tried to take away some of my pain. He held me tight and told me everything was going to be okay, even though everything felt apart right now, and my whole world seemed to be crashing down at my feet.

I sat there on his lap for a long time, until I did not have more tears inside, then I hugged him, "thanks," I whispered and kissed his cheek.

"You do not have to thank, my love." He said and stroked my cheek.

I smiled weakly and looked across the room and right into the big mirror, "I am a mess," I sighed.

"No you are not, you are perfectly beautiful," Troy smiled and kissed me softly.

You make me feel beautiful
When I have nothing left to prove
And I can't imagine how I'd make it through
There's no me without you
No me without you, no no
You hear what I say, when I don't say a word
You are my rising sun, you're the place I run

After some time and after talking with my parents, Troy got permission to stay as long as I needed him. So he drove home, told his parents what had happened, grabbed some clean clothes and his school things and got back to me.

The next day at school I was just wearing my sweatpants and a hoodie, I did not want to do anything. I did not want to dress up or anything.

As we entered the school, Troy and I were holding hands as always.

"You are beautiful," Troy whispered to me, knowing I felt like a mess, I felt like I had nothing left to prove to anyone.

I could not imagine how I would have made it through the night without Troy there to hold me tight. I would not be able to live without him. There would not be me without him! He heard me, he understood me, even when I did not say a word. He could read me like an open book. He knew when to talk to me, and he knew when to just hold me tight and let me cry. He was the one I had in my life that could bring the sun even when it was raining. He was the one I could run to with tears running down my face, looking like a mess, and still he would be the one to tell me, I was beautiful.

You know how it hurts when everything falls apart
And it seems like the world is crashing at my feet
You like me the best, when I'm a mess
When I'm my own worst enemy

Troy knew exactly how I felt. Only a year earlier he had lost his grandfather. He knew the pain, he knew how it felt when everything seemed to fall apart, and your world was crashing down around your feet. Nothing could ever be the same, and I felt like a mess, but Troy was there, holding my hand, helping me through the pain. He was there holding me tight in the middle of the night. He knew I could be own worst enemy, because I could torture myself by looking at pictures of my grandmother and make myself cry even more. But with Troy by my side, I did not torture myself the same way.

You make me feel beautiful
When I have nothing left to prove
And I can't imagine how I'd make it through
There's no me without you
No me without you
There's no me without you
No me without you

And when you say baby it's gonna get better, I believe you
And I wish that somehow I could see me though what you do
With my imperfections, you think I'm perfect
When it's not easy, you make it worth it

Troy was with me at the funeral. He was sitting with me, holding my hand. He promised me to be there by my side through it all. I had one thing I wanted to do at that funeral: hold a speech for my grandmother! It got arranged, Troy supported me in it, my parents supported me, and my friends supported me. I stood up in the church and walked up to the white coffin with red roses and yellow lilies. My grandmothers favorite flowers, I bow over the coffin and kissed it, I could feel the tears come, and I stood up again looking at my family, our friends, my grandmother's friends, and then at Troy, who nodded and mouthed,

"You can do it!"

I nodded at him and then I cleared my throat.

"My grandmother, who is lying in this beautiful coffin in front of me, in front of you, she was the best grandmother you could ever imagine! She was the most supportive woman. No matter what she would be there and help, comfort and take care of me, my family, her friends, my friends, and everyone. She was putting everyone before herself. No matter what was going on, she would make sure everyone else was okay, before she checked herself."

I looked down at the coffin and let the tears fall slowly.

"This summer, when I went to her place during the holidays, she told me to bring my cute boyfriend," I laughed a little to myself, "and so I did. My grandma just loved Troy, she was sure that he was the one for me, and so I am. Grandma always told me to follow my heart and to keep my head up high, even when it all falls apart. She told me to never give up, to fight for what I want. To fight for my life. She also told me that no matter how bad things look it will always get better. She was my hero ever since I was a little girl. I was always her little angel."

I smiled at the memory of how my grandmother always had been there, helping me up when I fell, telling me stories and how she had "saved" me from the big dog of hers, when it wanted to play with me, but I was afraid of it. I looked at the coffin again.

"Grandmother, I know you are gone now, but you… you will live in me. Not only in me, but in everyone who you knew, everyone in this church today. You will live in them. Every single one is met up here today to say goodbye to you… right now…"

I could feel a lump in my throat and the tears ran down my face.

"right now, I do not know how to move on, I do not know how to live. But I know you will be up there, watching over me, making sure that I do survive this. I know you had a long and happy life, a life with ups and downs, I know you are with granddad now, and you two will be happy together again. Remember how you told me about paradise, where only the good people came to after their death? The place where nothing bad can happen, where only joy and happiness is? I am sure that you are in that beautiful garden you told me about. I am sure that you and granddad is walking around smiling as you hold hands like you used to do…"

I felt how the pain inside of me grew harder, how it hurt inside my heart. I felt how the tears just streamed down my face.

"Grandma…" I closed my eyes and bit my lip, "I love you! I do not want to say goodbye to you… I… I… just cannot say goodbye…"

I felt my legs get weak and I fell down to my knees crying harder than before.

"Grandma, why did you leave me?!" I cried out loud.

I could hear the people in the church. I heard their sobs, their sympathetic whispering. And then I felt two strong arms around me before I could feel my mother, my father, and my uncle around me too. I felt those two strong arms, which belonged to my first and biggest love, Troy. He pulled me close to his chest, and I cried into his chest, holding onto him like he was the last person I had left. I could feel my father's hand on my shoulder. I could hear my mother cry, she was probably in my father's arms, and I could hear my uncle Jacob cry too. He said something…

"Gabriella, you are the bravest girl for standing up here, holding this speech for your grandmother, she would be proud of you! You was her one and only grandchild. She loved you. I was with her when she died," I looked up at my uncle, and he continued, "she told me to give you this," he pulled something out of his pocket. My grandmother's ring. I looked at him shocked. "She wanted me to give you this ring," Jacob said, "she wanted you as her only grandchild to have this, because you are her little angle."

Jacob bended down beside Troy and I. I slowly pulled away from Troy's arms and sat up and looked at my uncle, "Gabriella take this ring, keep it, make your grandmother even more proud of you… she was so proud of you no matter what you did!" Jacob smiled at me.

I nodded and hugged him tightly, "thanks Uncle Jacob," I said and smiled weakly.

Troy took my hand as I pulled back from my uncle, "it is going to be better, I promise you, babe," Troy whispered to me as he pulled me close to him.

I nodded slowly as we stood up and walked back to our seats with my family. Troy intertwined our fingers, and I rested my head against his shoulder as I let the tears run slowly.

As we stood at my grandmother's grave, I felt my legs get weak again. Troy saw it, and wrapped his arms around me to support me. As the priest finished what he had to say at the grave, I was crying like crazy again. I felt nothing, but hurt… the pain inside of me was taking over, making me a mess… I felt Troy's strong arms getting wrapped even tighter around me. "Babe, it is going to be okay…" he whispered.

The following days were a living hell. I could not do anything, Troy was with me all the time, and he was sitting with me crying into his chest. He held me throughout the night, he did not say much, but he promised me that everything would be okay, even though it was not easy right now, right here, he knew I would make it through this, and this pain and hurt I felt inside of me would make me stronger, and all the tears I cried now, they were worth it in the end. He made me feel better just by being there for me.

When everything falls apart
And it seems like the world is crashing at my feet
You like me the best, when I'm a mess
When I'm my own worst enemy
You make me feel beautiful
When I have nothing left to prove
And I can't imagine how I'd make it through
There's no me without you
No me without you, no no
No me without you
No me without you, no no… no

Really there would not be me without Troy.

Monday night, Troy once again was at my place to stay the night with me. We were laying on the bed, I had my head placed at his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

I sighed deeply.

Troy stroked my back, "are you feeling any better, my love?"

I sat up and looked at him and smiled a little, "yeah… thanks to you I am feeling better day for day…"

Troy sat up, "I am glad you are getting better baby," he said and kissed my forehead.

"I love you," I said softly as I stroked his cheek.

He stroked my cheek too, "I love you too, my love."

"There would be no me without you," I said and kissed him softly.

So what do you think? Tell me… it just came to me, when I heard the song.

I know I have not uploaded for a long time on "Saved from the Death" and "My life", and I am trying really hard to continue the stories. But I do not have much time. Today is the first day in a long time where I have been able to just sit with the computer without doing any homework! But I have Christmas holiday now, so I will TRY to continue the stories… and hopefully get a chapter of each out before the new year.