Rumpelstiltskin greeting all ya peeps in the Stargate fandom for the first time. I'm a new Gater who has just gotten into the show recently (but have been wanting to for a while). I've quickly fallen in love and this is my first fic. Stargate is intimidating to write apparently, but luckily the character's voices are stronger than some of my other fandoms.
So, I just saw the episode Need the other night and immediately a missing scene started plaguing my mind. So here it is, hope you all enjoy!
The oh so clever title is courtesy of Vladimir, who is feeling very proud of themselves for the "brand new gater they've infected".
*DISCLAIMER* RV makes no claim to own Stargate SG-1 or its characters. They are the property of Jonathan Glassner and Brad Wright. No profit is made from this writing.
It had been over a week since Daniel had willingly accompanied Jack back to the infirmary. Coming off of the sarcophagus addiction was a slow but steady process, and Daniel was only just starting to return to normal. Normal in a physical sense- the linguist had requested to be alone the entire time, save the occasional visit he allowed from Jack.
However, the team's hopes were up when Daniel agreed to see them. Jack, Sam, and Teal'c had decided to use the chance to discuss when he would get back to the team, how long he felt he needed to recover, how much they wanted him back.
The three of them sat tensely around the table in the briefing room. Jack drummed his fingers on the surface in front of him until he received a short glance from Teal'c and stopped. Sam leaned back heavily back in her chair for a moment but sat up quickly when the door opened. Daniel stepped in, almost cautiously, offering a half wave before casting his eyes down and taking a seat.
"'Bout time you joined the land of the living, Danny-boy!" Jack greeted with his usual faux-gusto, offering his friend a grin as a sat down in an attempt to break the ice. Daniel only offered a half-smile in response.
Sam shifted slightly in her seat. "How are you doing? Janet says all of your tests have returned practically to normal," she asked.
"I'm feeling, pretty okay," he replied after a moment, wringing his hands together and fixing his gaze on them. He felt three sets of eyes baring into him, examining his mostly-recovered appearance. The color had fully returned to his face since he had been strapped to the bed in the infirmary, his hair was clean and brushed, and he had returned to wearing his glasses. Unfortunately, his frames served to emphasize the red rims still lining his eyes and the dark circles underneath them. "Though I've definitely felt better."
"I can imagine," Sam said. "You're body has been through a lot."
"Tell me about it," he mumbled, pulling off his glasses to rub at his eyes.
"So, Daniel," Jack started purposefully, "we were wondering, about how long you think it'll be before you're... all better," he questioned. "The Doc's already cleared you medically so..."
"If you're asking if I'm ready to get back to work," he said, intently examining his glasses, "I don't know. I don't think I'm ready yet."
"How come?" Jack probed further, receiving a cautioning glance from Sam. He rolled his eyes slightly, sighing and quickly correcting himself, "I mean, is there anything we can do to help?"
Daniel shook his head adamantly. "I just don't feel... right. I... haven't been sleeping well," he explained weakly.
"Is Doctor Fraiser aware of this fact?" Teal'c asked, raising an eyebrow at the man.
"Yeah, yeah, she knows," he nodded. "She says, it's to be expected..." Daniel leaned back in his chair, eyes still trained on the glasses he set down on the tabletop.
"So, what you're saying is," Jack started, giving a rather disbelieving look, "is all you've got to do is, catch up on a little sleep?"
This time, the colonel got the same warning look from both Sam and Teal'c, but this time he just a look right back at them. "Look, Daniel," Sam said, "we totally understand if you're not ready right now, but we want to help. Staying locked up all by yourself for a week can't be good for you."
"We all wish for you to recover and return to exploring with us," Teal'c stated.
Daniel pressed his palms into his eyes until he saw stars, letting out a shaky sigh. "I don't know why you guys even want me back on the team," he said quickly, almost a whisper.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Jack barked defensively.
"Why would you think that?" Sam asked worriedly.
Daniel let his elbows fall onto the table, leaning forward so he was cradling his face in his hands, fingers tangled in his hair. "It's just, how can you guys trust me- how can I trust myself- after what I did to you?"
Jack slumped in his chair. "Is that way this is?"
"Daniel, that's the thing- you didn't actually do anything to us," Sam assured.
"Well, except when you pointed a gun at my head." Jack immediately regretted that joke, wincing at the split-second guilty glance he received from Daniel. 'Very bad timing,' he berated himself. He didn't blame Sam for kicking him under the table.
"I... I left you guys down in that mine for almost two weeks," he said, voice faltering. "I just... left you. You guys were dying down there. I stopped caring. I was letting you die."
"That wasn't you, Daniel," Jack attested. "That sarcophagus was messing up every part of you. You didn't have any control of that."
"I let it happen," he responded flatly.
"Didn't you agree to use it so Shyla would trust you?" Sam asked.
Daniel glanced over his hands at her for a moment before nodding. "Initially, yes."
"Would you have done that if you weren't trying to get us out of that mine?" she continued. He quickly shook his head. "You suffered because of that sarcophagus, but you took that risk to help us."
"And even through all of that mind-melting addiction," Jack added, "You did get us out of there. You knew we weren't going to let you go back to that place but you got us through the Stargate anyway."
"We do not blame you for succumbing to Goa'uld technology against your own will, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said. "You accept and forgive all that I have done at the hand of the Goa'ulds of my own accord; to blame you for your actions on P3R-636 would not be right."
Daniel fell silent for a long moment. "So, you guys don't blame me," he said, mostly to himself, letting his hands drop to the table and resting his forehead on his arm.
Sam reached across the table, giving his hand a squeeze. "No, we don't," she said, offering him a smile when he looked back up at her.
He returned a half-smile before pulling away to sit back in his chair. "Well, then I guess that just leaves the question... How will I stop blaming myself?" He instinctively turned his eyes to Jack, whose face held nothing but understanding.
"It might take a while," Jack said, "but you'll find your own way."
Two days later, Daniel returned with the team to P3R-636 to help free the slaves in the mine and convince Shyla to destroy the sarcophagus.