A/N: I just saw the infamous episode a few days ago. It shattered my heart. (winces) One thought, however, keeps bugging me. I don't understand why Diane chose to shoot Maeve – if she was that desperate to have Reid for herself wouldn't it have made more sense to take HIM along as she killed herself? I silly thought that transformed into this fic. (grins sheepishly)

WARNINGS: You know what? For once, none. Perhaps a hint of sadness, which is only to be expected with those two. (sighs)

DISCLAIMER: Pfft! If I DID own anything there's no way Maeve would've died. (hisses venomously)

Alright, because it's always unnerving to launch a new story I'll get to it before I change my mind. I REALLY hope that you'll enjoy the ride!

Zugzwang

2412

"You'd die for her?"

"Yes."

It all happens very, very fast. There are barked orders. Several people are moving. Dr. Spencer Reid feels a unwanted body's warmth next to his. And knows that it's over.

"Alright, then. Do it. Die for her. Because I'm not going to let her have you."

The gunshot is deafening.

He doesn't hear it.

1206

The dark is full of noise. Chaos. Blood. Shouting voices. Sobs, those unleashed and those sealed away firmly. Pleas.

"There's… You guys, there's a pulse!"

"Don't… Don't leave me! Please…! Don't…!"

"Where the hell are those medics!"

A bloodied hand squeezes a sickly pale one, with all its might. "Stay with me, Spence. Stay with me."

And then the medics are there. Pushing Maeve away, barking orders. Almost as soon as her hand slips from Spencer's his heart stops.

603

Spencer's eyes fly open and he gasps, like a man who'd just been drowning. The view he meets is full of light and it blinds him, brings more tears into his already moist eyes. His whole body is trembling under a storm it can barely hold down.

Did he just fall asleep or wake up?

He doesn't dare to sit up with the way his head is swaying but slowly his brain begin to make connections. The ground below him is soft and warm. Very close he can hear the sounds of waves crashing, the water almost touches the tips of his bare toes. He frowns.

How… did he end up to a beach?

All of a sudden it doesn't matter, though. Because he realizes that he isn't alone. Turning his head he finds Maeve's eyes. For the first time he sees her smile. He finds himself smiling as well.

268

The waiting room is surprisingly crowded, considering the late hour. Crowded yet unnervingly quiet. Maeve, still in a state of shock, wraps her arms tightly around herself and struggles with all her might to keep it all together.

She can't shake away the sight of medics giving Spencer CPR.

Can't stop hearing the conviction in his voice when he announced that he'd die for her.

And now that she's finally seen them she can't forget his eyes, doesn't even want to try. She's only looked into them once. But already she knows that if she never sees them again…

She jumps slightly when someone wraps a blanket around her. Looking up with some startle she discovers Derek. There's a loaded look on his tense, exhausted face. "You… were shivering."

She nods, not even trying to smile. "Thank you." And then, facing the pain in his eyes that almost matches what's swirling in her stomach, she gulps and goes on. "I… I'm so sorry." This is all her fault. If she'd never entered Spencer's life… If she'd never brought all of this to him… She wipes away the lone tears that roll. "I never…"

"Hey, none of that. There's only one person to blame and she's long gone." Derek's eyes soften. "He's going to be alright, you know?"

Maeve looks at him with genuine surprise. For the first time she keeps her eyes away from the waiting room's door for longer than four seconds. "How do you know?"

"Because I happen to know just how much he cares about you." Derek's voice is full of certainty and faith. "There's no way in hell he's going to let himself be pulled away from you like this."

Maeve wishes from the bottom of her heart that she'd share his confidence. Because just then a dark skinned, middle aged man with a bald head called 'Whitney, E., MD' enters the room slowly, visibly stalling. There's a all too serious look on his face.

134

Lay on the beach Spencer smiles still, reaches out a hand but it stops mid air. Falls to the sand near her. "I found you", he mumbles in a soft voice, unable to tear his eyes away from her.

Maeve reaches out her own hand, lays it mere inches from his. "I never doubted you", she announces in a whisper, as though anything louder might've damaged something.

The quiet around them is soothing. Spencer finds his eyes drooping but doesn't want to fall asleep in fear that this will all be gone when he wakes up again. He doesn't feel like he ever wants to get back up again. Not when he already has everything.

"You should wake up now, though." There's a hint of sadness coloring Maeve's voice. "You really need to let go."

He looks at her with a frown, prepared for a heated protest. But then he finally understands. And his heart breaks once more.

36

The doctor tells them that they got Spencer's heart to beat again. But he's unconscious. And there's no telling if he'll ever wake up again.

Maeve doesn't care about what they tell her. Sooner than the doctors would've wanted him to have visitors she's sitting beside him, holding on to his hand with all her determination. (She doesn't want to let go again if that hold is what keeps his heart beating.) She'll wait forever if she has to.

Swallowing down a lump that keeps coming back into her throat she leans forward, inhaling his scent that instantly feels soothing and familiar. Like home. Whispers in a voice that barely carries through all the beeping and humming of the machines. "Thomas Merton."

12

There's a taste of salt on Spencer's lips. Still he doesn't dare to reach out and touch her. Doesn't want to…

Maeve smiles although her eyes appear a little moist, shifts closer to him. He wishes that he'd be able to feel her warmth. "Shh… It'll be okay, I promise. Just wake up already."

Spencer swallows thickly and squeezes his eyes tightly shut, holding on to this with absolutely everything there is still left inside of him. "I don't want to wake up", he murmurs. "Not without you."

Maeve snuggles closer still, letting him feel her warmth. Her hand travels down his skin, as though trying to imprint every little detail. "You haven't lost me, Spencer."

He doesn't open his eyes. Doesn't want to see what he may never, ever find again. "You'll be gone."

"Then you'll find me again." There is no hesitation. No doubt. No one has ever believed in him like that. Somehow a trace of her unwavering faith slips under his skin as well.

Finally Spencer opens his eyes, all but stares at her. Into her trusting, warm eyes. Into her soul. Into the most beautiful thing he's ever laid his eyes on. "I love you." His voice breaks and he doesn't hold it back. She's worth every single flash of emotion that courses through him. He looks at her seriously, his heart beating in a way that suggests it'll break any given second. "I need you to know that I love you. Forever."

Maeve's eyes are full of tears while she leans forward and presses her cool, ghostly lips against his forehead. Already more than halfway gone. "I've never doubted that, for even a second." Her lips then move, find his.

In those few, flashing seconds he sees a whole lifetime with her. Their wedding. Their children. The two of them, growing old together. He sees a whole lifetime.

Then, with a single breath, it all fades away.

'I love you.'

'Then find me again.'

4

In a hospital long, pale fingers twitch, as though attempting to reach out for something. Softly and cautiously another hand grabs the fumbling one, holds on tight. Their wrists press together, pulse points brushing. Their hearts beating in a perfect sync.

"Spencer?"

Slowly, slowly a pair of hazel eyes blink open, at first bleary and unseeing. Feeling her touch he stiffens a little bit, obviously not having anticipated the contact. She only holds a litte more firmly, desperate to show him that she's really there.

Through almost spilling tears Maeve Donovan smiles. "It's alright", she whispers. "We're both going to be just fine. It's over, now. Everything's alright."

Finally he looks at her. Really looks, his eyes taking in absolutely all of her. And frowns. "Who are you?"

0

'2412. What if that's all I get?'

(Dr. Spencer Reid)

End./TBC.

A/N: To be fully honest I'm not sure if this story ends here. My mind's spinning with possible ideas for a continuation but I'm just not sure. (smirks sheepishly) But seriously, those poor things! 'CM's very own Romeo and Juliet. It would've been amazing to see them granted a happy ending. (keeps hissing at the creators of the series)

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Thank you so much for reading!

Take care!