So you know how iPhones have that built in dictionary thing? Yeah.. Well I had typed in the name Saki (refering to the author Donnie was talking about) into my notes, and as I held it down, I noticed that it had the little 'define' option. I clicked on it and, what do you know, first definition is H.H. Munro and the next is about a monkey. Is that inspiration or what?
I instantly began writing this. Waayyy too good of an opportunity to pass up. This was written in about two hours, though that isn't counting the break I was forced to take for dinner (Moms...never understand the whole inspiration thing and the phrase 'I have to write this right friggin now!').
I hope you enjoy reading this funny little one-shot as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT. 'Nough said.
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Monkey
The lair was nearly silent.
The four brothers were all doing their usual boring-day things. Master Splinter was in his room, no doubt meditating. Leonardo was watching Space Heroes, quietly quoting Captain Ryan's every word by heart. Michelangelo was alteranting between reading his Mega-Action Unicorn-Man comic book and playing with his Mega-Action Unicorn-Man doll-ahem- action figure as he sat on the couch, or laid across the couch, or laid across the top of the couch, or laid upside down on the couch... Let's just say he moved around a lot, loudly, not that Leo would notice, too absorbed in his favorite show was he. Donatello sat at his computer in his lab, not working on anything in particular for the first time in quite a while.
Raphael was in the kitchen looking for something edible to eat as it was nearing lunchtime. So far he had only found a bag of bread that still had a few slices left. Mind you, the task was much harder than it might sound. Mikey was often in the kitchen trying out the new recipes that he makes up, meaning he just throws a bunch of crap together all willy-nilly like. It was all just fine and dandy for Mikey, but for Raph and the rest of the family, none of it came anywhere near being even remotely edible. Finally he found a package of salami hidden behind the bowl of Mikey's 'creation' from two days ago, chicken broth mixed with some melted chocolate he ahd had stashed away. Choco-chicken soup he had called it. With a shudder at the thought of it, Raph shut the refrigerator door, salami in hand d=and set about making his sandwich. After putting the bread and the meat back (far far away from that wreched soup) he made his way back to the living room.
When he came in, he noticed that Mikey had moved yet again so that he was now half hanging off the back of the couch and was playing with his action figure for the time being.
"WHOOSHHH! I'll save you, lady!" he suddenly cried dramatically as he made the toy swoop down just as Raph was walking past the couch. Raph slapped him in the head as he passed. "OUCH!" the younger turtle complained.
"Ah, quit your whining, Mike," Raph growled in an almost half-way to halfway fond way, rolling his eyes, "I didn't even hit ya that hard." He used one arm to vault over the couch, nearly crushing Mikey's foot which moved just in time as he landed heavily on the cushion. He looked over at Mikey who was looking at him in suspicion at his brother's apparent change in destination. Grinning sadistically, the red masked turtle added in a threatening whisper, "This time..."
Mikey yelped fearfully and buried his face into his comic, the lady whom Mega-Action Unicorn-Man was suppose to be saving completely forgotten.
Nodding in satisfaction, Raph settled into the couch and bit down into his sandwich and its delicious salami contents that had been so freaking hard to find.
Suddenly, Donnie started laughing loudly from inside his lab, disrupting Leo from his show, Mikey from his comic, and Raph from his precious sandwich as they all looked over to the open door of their genius brother's lab. Other than when one red-headed girl by the name of April O'Neil was there, they couldn't remember a time when Donnie would all of a sudden start laughing like that when he was in his lab. They all shared a wary glance before getting to their feet in unison and quickly, but cautiously heading to the lab where Donatello sat at his computer, still laughing his skinny little turtle butt off.
They approached his desk silently, none of them knowing what to say as they just watched their brother guffaw uncharacteristically.
They inched their way to the other side of the desk but then stopped, still feet away from the bo-weilder.
Finally, Mikey tentatively spoke up.
"Umm... Donnie? Bro? You ooookay there?"
When Donnie didn't reply due to his continuous laughter, Raph turned to Leo with a creeped out expression. "Think we should get Sensei?" Leo was about to agree when Donnie spoke, though with trouble.
"HAHAHA!...No-no...No need for that. HAHA!"
Eventually, Don managed to get his laughter under control so that he could explain what was going on to his seriously weirded out older brothers (and Mikey).
"Okay, so I didn't really have anything I want to work on today, but I was really bored so I just started Googling a bunch of random stuff like I do from time to time, you know, just to see what will come up. So at some point I typed in 'Saki', like as in Oroku Saki, aka the Shredder, right? Anyway, before I pushed 'Enter' the thing underneath the search bar said 'Saki definition'. I clicked on it just to see what it would say. The first thing that came up was the author Saki. He was a British short story writer who was well-known for his satire, comic, macabre, and supernatural stories. One of his most well known stories is "The Open Window". Saki was just his penname though. His real name was Henry Hugh Munro and-"
Leo cut him off, squeezing his temples as if he had an oncoming headache. "Donnie. You were saying?"
"Right, right," the affore mentioned turtle said, realizing that he had, not for the first time, been rambling and getting off topic. A habit of his. " Anyways-"
He was cut off again by Raphael who snarked, "Better get on with it. Leo's missin' his little show. He may have kittens soon." Leo glared at his immediate younger brother and opened his mouth to retort.
It was then that Donnie was able to graduate from the cutted-offer to the cutter-offer as he cleared his throat to regain their attention before a fight could start. Again. "Anyways," he and Mikey shared an eye roll, "The second definition is what got me." He reached for the computer and turned it towards his brothers, barely able to restrain his laughter as he said, "Look for yourselves."
The first thing to have come up was of the author, Saki, just as Don had said. The second one read:
2.) saki (noun)
A tropical American monkey with coarse fur and a longy bushy nonprehensile tail.
The four brothers looked at eachother, sharing a silent message, before they all burst out laughing.
"Shredder's a MONKEY!" Mikey gasped out in between peals of laughter.
"I just knew I saw him scratch his butt when last time we saw him!" Leo chuckled.
That started a whole new round of laughter.
The rest of the day was not as boring as it had started out. They each ended up bursting out laughing randomly throughout the afternoon and evening. Whenever one of the brothers' eyes would meet another's, they would start laughing uncontrollably, ending up rolling all over the floor more often than not. Each one of those instances had poor, bemused Splinter jumping over one of his sons so as to not get tripped as they rolled by.
He didn't know what it was they kept finding so funny, but as far as he could tell, it was something having to do with bushy tailed monkeys.
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A few days later, the turtles were on a rooftop, talking excitedly about the fight they had just had with a dozen Purple Dragons in which they had royally handed the purple haired goons their butts. Half a second later, they were surrounded by Foot-bots. Leading the robot ninjas was none other than the Shredder, Oroku Saki.
The turtles took one look at the metal-clad man, standing proudly behind a group of his henchmen (henchbots?), the moonlight reflecting off of the deadly sharp, knife-like weapons on his gauntlets. Then they looked at eachother. Then back to the Shredder. Eachother again. Shredder. Turtles. Shredder...
They burst out laughing clutching their middles, leaning heavily against one another with tears of mirth streaming down their faces.
Behind his face plate, Oroku Saki frown in distaste and confusion.
"SILENCE!" He bellowed at the top of his lungs. The turtle brothers didn't react so he tried again, with just a 'touch' more anger. "I SAID SILENCE YOU IMPUDENT FREAKS!"
Raph managed to catch his breath long enough to sneer at the man whom everybody feared. Well, almost everybody..
"Hey, be quiet there for a second, will ya, monkey? We're trying to laugh here." And his laughter continued.
"Shredder! Shedder! I've been wondering..HAHA!...Do you have a long bushy tail hidden underneath that cape of yours?" Mikey grinned before falling against Leo again unable to keep himself up any longer.
Saki (*cough*monkey*cough*) glared before spinning around with a dramatic swish of his heavy cape (a cape that did not have a 'long, bushy tail' under it, thank you very much!), furiously stomping away from the turtles who had just dropped to the ground and began to ROFL. ("It means 'roll on the floor laughing' he would later explain to a mindless, motionless, uncaring Foot-bot as he poured out his teeny tiny heart to it).
He knew he should have kidnapped a hacker or something to delete that stupid definition from Google before those stupid turtles stumbled across it.
Curses...
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A/N Okay, so in school a few days ago, we were reading the short story The Open Window by Saki. Now, at the point were Vera starts her story to Mr. Nuttel, I realized that I had read the story years ago, maybe fourth or fifth grade. Well, back then I hadn't thought anything about the author's penname (Saki was his penname for Hector Hugh Munro), but now, I happen to be a huge Ninja Turtles fan. Can you guess what the first thing that came to my mind was? Why, of course. Oroku Saki, aka the Shredder. I was grinning like an idiot for the longest time, and I swear one of the kids across the room (the chairs in that class are in rows of three or two that sit facing eachother) was looking at me like I was insane or something. I'm usually pretty solemn and quiet in school so I can imagine why me grinning like I was might seem really weird. I usually save that stuff for when I'm by myself. Yes, I'm a bit of a loner unfortunately (well, sometimes unfortunately).
Thanks for reading! Review if you will. Not mandatory but very much appreciated. I'm a creature that thrives on feedback.
LOL Still can't get the idea of Shredder having a long, bushy tail under that cape... XDXDXD