N/A; Okay, so this is what I think and feel after I watched the last 100th episode of Bones. Or rather what I think Booth feels after this episode. I know it's messy and needs a lot of editing, but I believe in the method of making mistakes and learning from them in the future. Hope you like this piece and review you thoughts and comments at the end, which would be a great support for my upcoming story! Thank you.
After this experience I noticed what love really is. How important it is to get hurt to know you truly love. I love her, but she doesn't love me back. I don't believe it, it's a lie, but if that lie is what will keep us together then I will let myself, if only a small piece of me, believe it.
How love can break you heart to pieces, and the fact that you cannot glue these pieces together hurt even more then knowing you got hurt. Love can be frightening, it sure can scare you.
It can be delusional as well as everything you ever wanted at one place.
Love can result in tears, confusion and anger.
Anger of knowing you lost that important moment in your life that could have changed it forever, anger about knowing you might not get the same chance with that particular person ever again. Even if the frustration in not getting what you want will get you furious you will still have to push back all those emotions bottled up inside of you and live on with your life, like nothing had happened. You have to pretend that the love you feel so strong never exists. For the sake of the relationship, for not ruining already what you have. Because you know that if you make on mistake, it will be all over, and you will not get a second chance.
So we stay in our safe zone. We are fine with friendship, even though it hurts so bad to be around her and not telling her how much I love her, how I crave to hold her in my arms, to make love to her, to be one whole not two separate individuals anymore. A smile appears on my face with each glimpse I get of her. My heart skips a beat and I fell a warm feeling inside of me. A feeling I know I need to keep to myself and never get overboard with it, I have to be careful.
Careful, not to overstep my own limitations.
We sometimes offer up ourselves to much, and sometimes we are too blinded to see that our love might not come true.
But we are holding on to that fantasy, because we feel safe in it, because we know that once we let go, there will be not hope let. Hope is at the moment the only thing we people can feel we can crave, hold on to and never let go. Because if we do, then with no hope there are no dreams. And without dreams we would be lost.
So we dream on, for our own sake, even if we wish that piece of fantasy will never become a reality. Even if we know that the love we feel will never come true, we still dream on. Because dreams can never break into pieces like the heart, they start and then end, and then they start again but never break.
So unlike the heart our dreams will like on forever, for all eternity.
I know that her denial is rational, she wants us to keep working together, but it's not right. I know she loves me, if she didn't then why did she cry?
As we walked on the dark street dim with headlights, I held her close. She put her head on my shoulder and we walked like that for some time. I wished she wouldn't deny her feelings.
This Broken heart will heal; it will never be as new as it was before. I keep my hopes up, maybe one day she will realize that she loves me, and say it. Not be rational for a change. Not think with her brain but with her heart. I know somewhere within that Brennan is not only the stone hard scientist she wants to be, she is human and sometimes human emotions have to be stronger then facts or calculations.
For as long as I have hopes, my dream will live on. I'll prey that this dream will become reality someday, and hope God will hear me.
N/A; So guys what do you think? I really need your comments on this one. I may even write this though Brennan's perspective. Click on the Green button, I know you want to! I Hope you liked this Pierce of the story.