Okay, i swear. I have PTMS and FILACS chapters. They are almost done. I swear. I just got this massive inspiration, while babysitting and watching the Backyardigans.
ENJOY!
Title: Show Her You Love Her
Author: Laura Ferrari
Words: 2,200
Genre: Drama/Romance
Rating: T
Type: One-shot
Disclaimer: I do now own Life With Derek.
You never thought you'd see the day. The day that your life was in her hands.
Literally.
**
"DEREK!!" She grunts through her teeth. "Don't you worry, okay? Okay?" She slurps. Tears streaming down her face, snot everywhere. "Okay, Derek? I'm not letting go. You believe me don't you?" To prove her point she tightens her grip on your hands. But, it was inevitable.
She'd been holding on for too long, and both your hands are sweaty. The rain's not making it any easier. And neither is the doomful waterfall to your right. And she's slipping a little, too.
And with a calmness you never knew you had. "Casey," You stare straight in her face. "I need you to let go."
"No!" She looks at you like you've lost your freaking mind. And maybe you have. "What are you thinking? What are you even saying? Let go?" She laughs nervously. "I'm not letting go! Ju-j-just hold on! Okay? Just a little while longer, Derek. Just a little whi-"
"Casey!" And you knew you never had a calmness. "Casey, either you let go, or we'll both be at the bottom of that waterfall, together. You want that?" And she's crying harder now. "Huh? You wanna die right now?"
She clenches her teeth and sets her jaw.
"All you hard work, all your studying, will have been a complete waste." You bark at her.
She closes her eyes and then opens them furiously. "That is a price I'm willing to take."
**
There were so many times you wanted to tell her. Too many almost. A million perfect moments. But, you decided the less you say, the better. You don't want anything unnecessary to slip out. But, despite being the "Triple D" everyone thinks you are, underneath you are the biggest chicken alive.
So, you show her you love her in other ways.
"So," She spins toward you. "Tickle-me pink or cherry blossom pink?" She's holding out two shirts at you. Two shirts that look exactly the same. You feel this strange need bubble inside you, to point it out to her, but you know she'd just bitch at you for twenty minutes straight. Nobody wants that. And you'd do anything for her. And it's the little things that matter, right?
You mumble. "I always liked cherries." Her smile falters a little. Almost as if she was expecting a different answer. And then – with mild effort- it's forced back on.
"Tickle-me pink, it is." You sigh, and roll your eyes. And then you pick up a magazine next to you.
It is suddenly quiet. And you wonder, somewhere in the back of your mind, why it is, so you look up. She's staring at you. With confused, undecipherable eyes. You look behind you and then back.
"What?"
She purses her lips. "What's wrong with you?"
You're confused. "Nothing. Why?"
"You aren't… Why aren't you arguing with me?" She folds her arms over her chest in indignation.
You laugh. It's quick, and short. "You want me… to fight with you?"
"Yeah." She breathes out.
"Why?"
"Well," She stammers. "I… like fighting with you."
"Hold on." You set down the magazine and give her your undivided attention. "You like fighting with me?"
"You're always avoiding me," You were unaware she felt that way. "And it's the only way I can get you to talk to me nowadays."
You're looking at her face. And she's looking at yours. It's like you're looking inside each other's soul. And then she blinks. And you know. You know she feels exactly the same way you do. And then you blink.
"Those shirts," You cough. It's been a while since you've done this. She, slowly, unfolds her arms, as you point to the shirts in her hand. "are exactly the same."
She pauses. The quickest of pauses, but a pause. And you know she gets it. That you feel that way too.
"They are not! They are two different shades of pink!" And she smiles, grateful that you understand. Understand exactly where she stands.
So, you show her you love her in other ways.
**
You're on a date. With Michelle. Michelle – I –don't-go-out-on-a-date-with-anybody- Jergens. And this should be the best day of your life. You've done the yawn-arm- thing already, and now it's time for the big kiss. You lean in, and your phone rings.
You know who it is, even before you look at the caller ID.
And you don't have a special ringtone for her.
You lean back, and pick up the phone. "What?"
"Uh," She's quiet for two seconds. "I need help. Yes, help… is what I need."
"Help?" Since when does she come to you for help? "With what?"
"I have a project due tomorrow. That will decide my grade. This is make or break." She sounds almost as if she is making this up on the spot.
"You want me to help you, with a project?"
She scoffs, like it was so insulting. "No."
"Then what? I'm on a date here."
"I know! I know you're on a date, Derek! I know, dammit!" She says it really fast and there's something else underneath her tone. You don't know what it is, but it makes you feel guilty. "I need someone to go the store and buy me construction paper."
You're quiet. For a long time. And you wonder if she thinks you hung up on her. Michelle is looking at you funny as you stand up and throw a twenty on the table, and walk away.
"What color?"
So, you show her you love her in other ways.
**
"Mr. Trent," She's saying as you walk through her door. "As much as I would love to babysit Karen, I just- I can't. I'm swamped."
You can't hear what "Mr. Trent" is saying on the other line – obviously- so you listen to her side. While make yourself at home by making yourself a sandwich.
"Mr. Trent, I know. I know I promised." She sighs. "Yeah, I know!" Her voice rises. "I know how much you've done for me. But…. I have finals!" She looks completely and utterly wiped, and then her body stills. "Certainly, Mr. Trent. Bring her right over."
She falls onto her couch, and screams into the pillow.
"Somebody's a little McGrouchy today, eh?" She whips her eyes toward you. And you smirk.
"McGrouchy? You want McGrouchy?" She stands up and is stomping over to you. "I'll give you McGrouchy. I have finals in a week. FINALS! And Mr. Trent – that "nice" guy who got me this scholarship that's paying for my entire education, and this apartment, and my car- has decided now to ask me for a favor. NOW! A week before finals." She stares at you, and apparently you're not getting the seriousness of this situation. So, she yells. "FINALS!"
You want to laugh. Because only Casey would feel like this situation was life or death. Because only Casey would stress over babysitting. Like you even had to do anything while babysitting?
"I'll babysit her." She stops her ranting, and is actually look-looking at you. With that one look. That look you guys don't talk about. "I'll watch the little monster while you study."
"You will?" You nod. "Don't you have finals?" You do.
But, you shrug. "Never intended to make much outta my life, anyway." She bites her lip, almost as if she's weighing your failure and hers, and then her arms are around you. Breaking the no-hug policy.
"Thank you so much. You have no idea what this means to me." And you-slowly- wrap your arms around her.
So, you show her you love her in other ways.
**
"Ahem, everybody." No one stopped talking. "Ahem!" They all turned to look at her - of course as soon as she had walked into the door of your old house your eyes had immediately found hers, and the person standing next to her.
"Casey! You're back!" Lizzie and Marti ran up to hug her, and she hugged them back.
"Who's your friend?" Nora asked.
"Okay, everybody. This is Craig." Everybody waited. Because, duh? You had all met him before.
"Okay, um. We're getting married!" She bites her lip and waits.
Cheers erupt from the room, although Nora does not look exactly pleased about her daughter being engaged at 19. And of course, you. Your heart is slowly breaking. But, this story really isn't about you, is it? Her eyes find yours and you quickly look away. You stand up; pat Craig on the shoulder, and mutter, "Good luck, with that" before fleeing up the stairs, into the safe haven of your use-to-be room. Which is now a gym. You sit down on the treadmill, and think. How the hell did you become so dependent on McDonald?
The door creaks open. And, again, you know who it is, without even looking up.
She walks over and sits next to you on the treadmill. "Derek," She says softly.
When you don't say anything, she leans her head against your arm, and grabs your hand.
You sit like this for a while, until you say, "Casey, I-" She looks up at you. Almost daring you to say it. It's not even that hard, because she knows it. I love you. I love you. It's three words. Cake. "I… " You shake your head. "-hope you and Craig have a good life together. He's a good guy."
Water fills her eyes, and her head is back on your shoulder. "You are too, Derek."
Nora calls you a week later. Engagement's off.
So, you show her you love her in other ways.
**
"Casey." You are completely serious. There is no Derek-the-prankster here. No insensitive-skirt-chasing-cad here. It's just you and her. "I need you to do something for me."
She's shaking her head. Her face turns into one of determination. "NO! You're not dying today, Derek." She sniffs. "Not on my watch."
But, ironically as she says this, you slip. Just a little. She screams. "MOM! GEORGE!"
You know what you have to do.
"Casey," She interrupts you.
"Stop! Stop trying to make it better. Stop trying to always be my hero. I don't need you to be. I'm the hero, now. Mmkay? I'm Clark Kent! I'm frickin' Peter Parker! And NO ONE is dying today!"
"Casey, you've got your whole life ahead of you. You've got graduation in a couple days; you've got jobs lining up for you. You've got guys lining up for you. You were made for more than me. More than to be that girl who died, trying to save that guy from falling down a cliff. Way more than that. And I'm not letting anything stand in the way of you and your future."
She begins to sob harder, knowing that he's right.
"I have always wanted the best for you, Casey. But, killing yourself doesn't make you Clark Kent. It makes you stupid."
She doesn't laugh at your poor attempt to cheer her up. And neither do you. Because you are completely serious.
"But, what about you, Derek. What about your dreams and your future? Huh? You think I'm just gonna let something happen to that?"
You smirk – one last time, "Never intended to make much outta my life, anyway." A tear strolls down your face.
She's hyperventilating. Because she's shaking and she knows she can't hold on forever. "MOM! GEORGE!"
You lick your lips and sigh. "You know I love you, right?"
She's shaking her head again, while kissing your entwined hands. "NO! You can tell me you love me after we get ourselves out of this mess, alright. It'll be the perfect moment. We'll go out to dinner, and I'll order something expensive – like lobster- to make you mad. And we'll live together, forever and ever-"
You're suddenly yelling. "Listen, Casey! Things in life don't happen like that. Perfect moments don't happen for people like me. So all those "perfect" times I could've told you I loved you… it's bull Casey! Bull! Love is the small things. The small things you do for someone. And sometimes you've gotta put your love aside, because there's something greater… I may not have exactly known that then, but I do now. " And strangely, you're crying just as hard as she is. "You remember that okay?"
"NO! NO!" She always was stubborn.
You nod and look at her meaningfully. "Don't do anything stupid."
And with a sudden fierceness she's yelling. "No, Derek! What are you doing?!? Who do you think you are, telling me what to do, like that? Huh?"
You're releasing your grip, and suddenly you're falling.
She grabs your fingers by her fingertips. And you hear her fingers breaking. "MOM!" But, her scream held a lot more defeat than it should.
She sees what you're about to do, and she huffs out, "I love you, too, Derek Venturi. More than I will love anyone else in the entire world."
And you let go of her hands, and fall.
Fall into a state of forever, when perfect moments are true. And you shared them all with Casey.
**
And, so, you showed her you loved her in other ways.
Hoped you liked it.
Please, Review.
Laura :D