Title: Little Valenwinds
Author: Enide Dear
Rating: so sweet you'll need to brush your teeth afterwards.
Pairing: CidxVince
Author's note: I managed to get in little!Hojo wanting to play doctor in this fic…On hindsight, probably not a good thing.
**
"Dear Holy," Tifa said, stunned. "I had no idea there existed materia that could do that."
"I, um, always thought it was a myth," Cloud agreed.
"Aw, they're so cute!" Yuffie cooed.
"Could ya lot stop yer yapping and help us get the fuck back to normal?!" Cid growled and pushed at his clothes that suddenly were several sizes to large; the blue sweater hung to his heels, the pants were a puddle around his feet and he was very aware that his underwear had fallen off.
Vincent stood next to him, fighting to get out from underneath a cloak that was suddenly big enough to serve him as a tent. Muffled, annoyed grunts could be heard from within its crimson depths.
"Hush now, Cid," Aeris smiled. "That is no language for a child to use."
"I am not a child!" Cid stamped his foot, which was very much too small for his boot.
"Well, you look like one. I'd say you are back to about six or seven years old." Cloud tried hard not to grin.
Vincent had finally won the fight against his cloak and a small, pale, pouty face hidden under long black hair poked out, glaring around.
"If anyone would be so kind as to explain what is going on here," he said with a show of dignity slightly spoiled by the fact that he, too, was only covered by his shirt, "before I start loosing my patience."
"Seems you two got hit by some sort of strange materia – you both devolved into children." Nanaki explained, "at least physically. I've never heard of such things, but-" it was odd to see a dog-lion-thing shrug, but he managed "- at the other hand I'd never heard of some of the words Cid uses, and never of people surviving thirty years in a coffin before, either."
"Well, turn us back!" Cid tried to lift his spear from the ground, but it was too long and heavy. He swore at it, but it kept laying there. "This is worthless!"
"Alright…we tired all the common Remedies, so perhaps there's some new materia out there. Me, Barret and Cait Sith will go search, and you will stay here. Apparently your fighting abilities are also down to a seven year olds level." Cloud hefted his huge sword.
"Wait, you are not leaving us here with them, are you?" Vincent threw a worried glance at the girls who where making all kinds of Awww….noises at a scowling Cid.
"They'll take care of you, I'm sure." Cloud did distinctly not snigger.
Cid and Vincent both swallowed nervously as the smiling girls approached.
"I think this qualifies as cruelty against children."
"I agree."
**
"Nonononono! Not my cigs!" Cid jumped helplessly after the carton that Aeris had taken from him. "I need those ta live!"
"No, you don't, little Cid. They're not good for you. Here, have a lollipop instead."
"I don't want no fucking lollpop, Aeris! I'm a grown man and I've been smoking since I was fifteen!"
"Which is in another ten years, then. Here." She held out the lollipop. "And don't get your new clothes all dirty now."
Sulking, Cid stomped away, as far as a six year old boy in sneakers could stomp anywhere. He had a new t-shirt with a moonrocket on it (courtesy of Tifa) instead of his pilot outfit, a hockey stick instead of his spear (courtesy of Yuffie) and now a lollipop instead of his cigs, thanks to Aeris.
He felt like shit.
Trying to stomp in rubber soles, he ambled away to find Vincent, the only one who could possibly understand him now.
**
He found Vincent sulking on a red blanket, looking out over a playground, a black turtleneck drawn up to his chin and a slingshot in his back pocket.
"How ya doin', Vince?" He slurped around the lollipop. "Did Yuffie manage to give ya cooties yet?"
"She wanted to give me a bath, so I ran away. It's perverted, I'm telling you. I have some serious worries about that young girl."
"Yeah. Young people aren't what they used to be, right?" Cid grinned. "So what's ya doing?"
"Looking at them." Vincent nodded at the children at the playground. "This…unwanted youth makes me remember my own childhood."
"Lemme guess. It was all dark and lonely?"
"Not at all." Vincent looked up. "It was very happy. In fact, we used to play a lot of games, such as…tag!"
He suddenly poked Cid in the belly, grabbed his lollipop and ran down the green hill for all he was worth.
"Hey, that's mine! I'll get ya fer that!" Cid rushed after him.
**
Vincent was faster than Cid, but Cid was more stubborn and had a better stamina, despite the smoking. The would-be-had-been pilot managed to corner Vincent into some bushes in the far end of the field.
"I know yer in there, so ya might as well come out!" he shouted, but nothing moved. Muttering obscenities, he started to thrash at the boughs.
A dark shadow freed itself from the undergrowth and threw itself at him, fangs flashing. Cid yelped and fell backwards, stumbling over his own hockey stick. A warm, slobbering thing settled on his chest, drooling brimstone smelling saliva all over his face as it licked his nose and cheeks.
"That's not fair! Turning into Galian Beast isn't playing fair!" Cid whined, finally managing to heave the demon puppy off him. He grabbed its tail as it tried to make another dash for it. "No, ya don't! Turn back ta Vince and give me back my lollipop or I'll shave ya!"
The threat succeeded and Vincent returned, only to have Cid clamber atop of him and tickling him mercilessly.
"No, stop it! Stop it, Cid, before I wet myself!" Vincent howled with laughter.
"Serves ya right, it would. Where's my lollipop?!"
Vincent finally returned the by now rather sticky and dirty candy and Cid popped it determinedly into his mouth, grinning proudly.
"Tag," he said poking Vincent's tummy. "Tag,tag,tag,tag…"
"Stop it!" Vincent started giggling again.
"What are you doing?" a new voice interrupted them and they both looked up. A lanky boy with long dark hair in a pony tail and glasses on his nose looked down on them with a sort of hungry curiosity. He looked like he spent too much time indoor, probably hanging over some unhealthy chemicals.
"What's it to ya?" Cid grumbled; the kid made him nervous somehow, although Vincent must have felt it worse; he was trying to hide behind the blond boy despite being a head taller than Cid.
"Just that if you want to play doctor, I'm really good at it…."
"Ew!" Cid waved the hockey stick in the air. "Beat it, ya pervert, before I kick yer ass!"
The kid pouted but hurried away, and Cid sighed in relief.
"I don't even want ta know what that was about. Now, we'd better get back. Hopefully Cloud and the others found something ta help us with this shit."
"I don't know," Vincent shrugged. "I was really starting to enjoy myself. As an adult I can't do this, for example…" He leaned over and placed a candy-sticky kiss on Cid's cheek; as Cid stammered with surprise, Vincent snatched the lollipop and ran once more.
**
Avalanche had assembled outside, waiting impatiently for Cid and Vincent to show up. Cloud was idly tossing a yellow materia orb in the air.
"Where did they go…." He asked, just as a high pitched screaming sound made them all turn. Cloud was almost knocked over as a small dark-haired figure bounced into his legs, and just seconds later a blonde one threw himself over the dark, screaming:
"Mine! Mine! Mine!" The two tumbled over the grass, oblivious of the slack-jawed audience, grabbing for a lollipop and giggling like mad.
"Um, Cloud, I think you can try that now…" Tifa nudged the stunned leader.
"Oh, right…" Cloud raised his hand and a yellow flash engulfed the two children.
In a flash, the two children were gone and Cid and Vincent were rolling on the grass, quite grown up. Cid had just managed to wrestle down Vincent for another tickle, but Vincent still had the lollipop in his mouth. None of them seemed to have noticed the change back just yet.
Unfortunately, as they both grew, their now too small clothes ripped and tore immediately.
Tifa got bright red.
Aeris made a happy squeeing sound.
Yuffie burst out giggling.
Barret fainted.
Cloud dropped the materia on his toe.
Nanaki, coughed politely as the team around him went through their various stages of shock, and then, very gently, started herding them back into the cabin away from the tumbling, giggling, candy-sticky, naked men.
"I think we better leave the children to their games," he sighed.