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Voldemort sat down on his chair in Malfoy Manor. It was summer, and finally Albus Dumbledore was dead. Everything was going to plan. His Death Eaters were gathered around the long white marble table ready to give him the weekly report but not one of them was smiling.
Voldemort was confused. "What could be wrong?" He thought to himself.
"Fellow Death Eaters, we have defeated Albus Dumbledore, we almost have complete control over Hogwarts and we are one step closer to killing Harry Potter. We have accomplished a lot over the passed weeks." Voldemort clasped his spidery white hands together. "However, your thoughts aren't exactly pleased. Why is that Lucius?"
"I don't know what you mean my Lord," Lucius said nervously.
"Lies!" Voldemort shouted. "Tell me the truth!"
"Well, my Lord, although your idea is going to plan and may I say what a marvelous plan it is –"
"Get to the point, Lucius! Groveling will do you no favours."
"My Lord, over the past year, applications for joining the Death Eaters are falling…" began Lucius.
"What!" Voldemort screamed standing up in protest. "But everybody loves Voldy!"
"Yes, my Lord but …"
"Why hasn't everyone alerted me of this before?"
"My Lord, if I may," Bellatrix stood up. "We thought the defeat of Dumbledore would boost the numbers up but I'm sorry to report nothing has happen."
"Then what do we do?"
"I have a plan, my Lord," a voice came from beside Voldemort.
"Yes, Severus, maybe you will come up with a plan unlike these idiots," Voldemort said calming down.
"Many people try to advertise their products or groups by radio or television using song. If we came up with a song that could be broadcasted on radio we may be able to encourage people to join the Death Eaters" Snape finished and Voldemort began to grin.
"Yes! Why didn't I see it before? A song… Lucius you will write the music, Bellatrix you will write the lyrics, Snape, you will make sure the song is suitable and worthy of advertising the Death Eaters. And the rest of you will practice singing as a group!"
"What about you my Lord," Bellatrix asked.
"Me? I will be the lead singer!"
Everyone stared blankly at Voldemort.
"Well, what are you waiting for? Get singing!"
"Right so everyone knows their parts?" Voldemort asked his gang of Death Eaters two weeks later in a recording booth in London.
"Right, Everyone at the ready! One and a two and a one two three four!"
*music starts to play to the sound of Lollipop*
Death Eaters: Voldemort Voldemort
Oh Voldy, Voldy, Voldey
Voldemort Voldemort,
Oh Voldy Voldy Voldy
Voldemort!
Snape: *makes popping noise*
Voldemort: Come and be a death eater,
I'll tell you why
You can hurt people til they cry,
And when the Auror come to take us down,
Man, they haven't got a chance
Death Eaters: You'll love Voldy
Voldemort Voldemort
Oh Voldy, Voldy, Voldy
Voldemort
Snape: *makes popping noise*
He's even better than that Dumbledore guy,
Voldemort: You can kill Harry Potter and all his friends
If you had a choice
Harry'd be your pick
But that evil job is mine!
Death Eaters: Voldemort Voldemort
Oh Voldy Voldy Voldy,
Voldemort Voldmort
Oh Voldy Voldy Voldy
Voldermort!
Snape: *makes popping noise*
Death Eaters: We love Voldy!
Tell you why
He puts giant snakes and skulls in the sky
He loves to kill people till he can't see straight
GEE, LORD VOLDEMORT IS GREAT!
Voldemort: I'm so evil!
All: Voldemort Voldemort
Oh Voldy, Voldy, Voldey
Voldermort, Voldemort,
Oh Voldy Voldy Voldy
Voldemort!
Voldemort: Join the Death Eaters where everyone loves Voldy!
- Fin -