This is the M-Rated sequel to my older PG-Rated story "Sam's Sweet Birthday." No, Cat's surprises for Sam's birthday doesn't end with just a belly-burstin' breakfast and a pair of nunchuks. Nope. Cat's got something more... "fan-fictiony"... planned for the evening.

Fair notice: Our M-Rated story actually begins with just some playful flirty show-inspired innuendo to ease us into the night. A little Sam & Cat - inspired foreplay if you will. Click through to Chapter 2 and beyond for the "Scenes", you sickos. Just for you, each chapter will become a little more steamier, and a LOT more kinkier, with gradually building S&M scenes courtesy of Sam Puckett's abrasive approach towards sex.

Enjoy!

(Chapter 1)

Sam is in the living room messing around with the new nunchucks Cat gave her for her birthday, practicing the moves she's seen in kung fu movies over the years with despicably poor form. Cat walks into the living room, cautiously avoiding the twirling nunchucks, and calmly sits on the couch.

CAT: "Sam? Believe it or not, I still have one more surprise for your birthday."

SAM: "More?"

CAT: "Yep. Come, come." (Cat pats the seat cushion next to her)

Sam sits down right next to Cat.

CAT: "There's still this note from your secret admirer. Look." (Cat hands Sam a folded note)

SAM (reading): "From your secret admirer, Hapy Birthday. There's a surprise sitting right before your eyes. Please, Please, PLEASE do with her as you wish tonight, no matter how far your imagination may take you. Happy Birthday, Mistress. From your obediently faithful... and DESPERATELY willing Secret Admirer."

Cat, her knees pressed together, her hands folded on her lap, looks at Sam, with a kittenish smile, batting her eyelashes.

SAM (looking around the couch, excitedly): "Where is it?"

CAT (a little sternly): "Where is what?"

SAM: "Where's the surprise?"

CAT: "...It's ME!"

SAM: "...Oh. ...(realizing) OHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Cat giggles.

SAM: "Innnnterrrestiiiing..."

CAT: "Yep. 'Til midnight, I'm all yours, baby! To do as you please! Whaddya say? How 'bout it?"

SAM: "Hmm. Not sure if I should be a little turned on... or a little freaked out."

CAT: "Both!"

SAM: "...I dunno..."

CAT: "Come on, Sam. You could do whatever you want with me! It'll be fun!"

SAM: "Whatever I want, eh? Well... In that case, first order of business? Mama needs to do some shopping."

CAT: "Shopping? Where?"

SAM: "At the sex-toy shop."

CAT: "SEX Toy shop? What goes on in there? Does Ken and Barbie play Naked Twister while Mr. Potatohead tries on... Mrs. Potatohead's clothes?"

SAM: "... Something like that."

(Picture Collage)

Cat's too scared to go to the sex shop with Sam, so Cat waits at home for Sam to bring home some surprises. At the sex shop, Sam strolls down the aisles, casually filling her shopping basket with all sorts of novelty costumes, dildos, lubes, vibrators, cuffs and collars and whips, oh my.

SAM: "And a little bit of thiiiiiis, And a little bit of thaaaaaaat..."

Sam approaches the checkout counter. A typical Dan Schneider-show loser-type fat guy starts ringing up her purchases.

LOSER CASHIER GUY: (eyeing all of Sam's purchases) "Wow. You're a real heavyweight."

SAM: (looking the guy up and down) "... right back at you."

LOSER CASHIER: "Okay. And your total comes out to sixty nine sixty nine."

SAM: "... You're shitting me, right?"

LOSER CASHIER GUY: (looks side to side shifty eyed, leans in, whispers) "That can be arranged..."

Sam makes a grossed out face.

SAM: (suddenly, explosively) "SECURITY!"

A security guard walks over to the checkout.

SECURITY GUARD: "What seems..."

Sam just grabs the taser out of the security guard's holster and zaps the cashier with it right in the heart. He yelps and falls to the floor like a sack of bricks. Sam puts the taser back into the security guard's holster.

SAM: "Thanks." Sam picks up her shopping bags, and walks away.

Back home:

Cat is in the kitchen as Sam enters, kicking the front door shut behind her.

SAM: "I'm baaaack. And look what I got for you to wear."

Sam pulls out a furry novelty cat tail out of her shopping bag.

CAT: "Vermin?"

SAM: "It's a Tush Tail!"

CAT: "I already have a Tush Tail just like that."

SAM (devilishly): "Nope. Not like this one."

CAT: "I don't know how I'm even supposed to put this on. Where's the belt?"

SAM: "There is no belt."

CAT: "What's that on the end?"

SAM: "It's a plug."

CAT: "What does it plug?"

SAM: "... Your butt."

CAT: "My butt?!"

SAM: "...I'm afraid so, Cat."

Cat looks at the TushTail, and then up to Sam with worry on her face.

SAM: "It's a new model. It'll still wag when it reads your heart rate changing . It'll just.. read it somewhere else."

CAT: (worriedly) "Hmm... I don't know..."

SAM: "Oh come on Cat. You said you were up to do whatever I wanted for my birthday."

CAT (trying to regain her composure): "Alright Sam. I'm sticking by my word. If that's all you want for your birthday, then that's what you're getting."

SAM: "Who said that was all I wanted?"

CAT (looking a little nervous again): "You mean... there's more in that bag?"

Patting the shopping bag in her hand gently, Sam nods with a cute, mischievous smile.

CAT: "Oh boy."

(laugh track)

Things get too sick for Nick in Chapter 2. Stay tuned!