Disclaimer: Not mine

Notes: Post series, spoilers apply

I'm never going to see Tatsuya again.

I still hold out hope that I'm wrong, of course. We all do. But it's also been seven years and we've had to change, if only to survive. We've all made ourselves face that possibility, not because we want to, but because it was the only way we could function after it was all over.

I think Sion has the most hope left out of all of us. He'll still go on about how he wants to see Tatsuya again… but he also has Domon to support him, to keep him from getting too lonely to lose his hope. And of course, Sion's there to make sure Domon doesn't lose hope, either. Domon tries to avoid talking about Tatsuya (and Honami) too much these days, but when he's around Sion, you can tell that he thinks he'll see them again. They keep each other's hope alive.

I wish I had someone like that.

But that's not fair to Ayase, I remind myself as I run my fingers through his hair. He has been there for me all these years… but not to give me hope. It started out as an awkward attempt (on both parts) to relieve the pain of losing Tatsuya, but somewhere along the way, it became something more.

Sometimes I wonder how much more. Does he watch me when I sleep, like I do with him occasionally? Does he think about me during the day? Has he noticed that his closet is half full with my clothes?

I could always ask him… but that would be admitting that we do, in fact, have something. That we've moved beyond Tatsuya. That we've changed too much.

"Yuuri?" He says my name around a yawn.

I try to hide the beginning of a grin. "Good morning."

That earns me the kind of glare he usually saves for Domon. "Not everyone considers four am morning, you know."

"Then they need to re-learn the concept of time." I push the blankets off and start hunting for a clean uniform-- I have work in an hour. Ayase doesn't have to be anywhere until eight, so I can see him nodding back off in the corner of my eye.

It's not until I zip up my jacket that I notice that Ayase looks… strangely peaceful. The last time I'd see him look that content was with Tatsuya…

There are no more doubts in my mind as I head for work. Ayase and I have changed, and we are going to continue to change. However, we can still give each other hope for a better tomorrow.