A/N: Hey, so someone asked me to do a story on Jay's dad based off the Med promo. I haven't seen the sneak peek, because I already had most of this typed and didn't want to have to change it lol

This actually took me a while, trying to get it to flow... Thank you so much to Pauline on twitter who read this to give me ideas and feedback! :)

Here with you

Erin POV

"Erin." Jay breathes out quietly, looking up from his hunched position in the hospital waiting room chair.

"Jay." I try for a smile, my tears begging to spill over my cheeks.

"What are you doing here?" His voice isn't more than a whisper.

"Hank told me what's going on."

"You came?" Shock is clear in his blue eyes.

"Of course I'm going to be here for you, just because we're… I still care." Jay's eyes are full of his own tears, red rimmed from earlier crying.

Jay stands up and pulls me into his arms, my hands wrap around his body soaking in the embrace.

His tears are on my neck as sobs rack his body; I pull him tighter nothing keeping my own tears at bay now.

"I'm so sorry baby." The name slips through my lips out of habit, I'm unsure if it's even registered on Jay through the crying.

"I don't know why I'm crying." Jay admits quietly pulling back; my hands reach up to wipe his tears away.

"He's your father Jay." My hands caress his face, using his tears as an excuse for contact.

"I haven't spoken to him in years Erin. What right do I have to…" Jay trails off, seemingly at a loss for words.

"To what? To be scared? To grieve?"

"I feel so guilty. I've been so mad at him that… maybe I've lost him before we could fix things." I lead Jay back over to the chairs, our hands clutched together as we sit.

"I'm sure you had your reasons Jay."

"They always seem so much less important at times like this." His eyes find mine, leading me to wonder if he's speaking of our own problems too.

"What do we know?"

"Not much, they rushed him off to surgery. I haven't heard."

"Okay. Do you want me to try and find an update?" Jay nods and I stand up, my hands leave his to cup his cheeks and place a tender kiss on his forehead for support.

I make my way through the hospital looking for a familiar face to ask when I spot Will.

"Will, hey."

"Erin. What are you doing here?" His eyes are bloodshot, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

"I heard about your dad, I'm sorry." I reach out to squeeze his arm gently.

"Thanks."

"Do you have an update? I'm with Jay, he wants to know." Will scoffs.

"I thought you and Jay were over now?" Pain stabs my heart.

"We're… figuring things out. But I still love him, I won't let him go through this alone." I'm quiet but fierce.

"I'm surprised he's here." Will's tone is bitter.

"What's that supposed to mean?" My eyebrow rises.

"He hasn't even seen dad in years, hell hasn't spoken to him."

"Look, I don't know what happened but I'll just remind you that, you weren't there for Jay either when your mum died. He forgave you." Will nods, pain in his eyes.

"Sorry Will. I know you're just upset and lashing out. But please don't last out with Jay, he's struggling with guilt over this already. And if you say something, he'll say something and…"

"We'll both walk away angry and with regrets." He finishes quietly.

"Yeah."

"Glad he still has you looking out for him." I pull Will in for a hug, sensing he needs the comfort.

"Have you heard anymore? How bad is it?"

"Bad."

"I'm sorry. Come sit with us." I offer gently, not wanting to leave him alone.

"Nah, I'm gonna work. Keep my mind busy."

"Okay, if you change your mind. You know where we are." I leave him with a small smile, and as much encouragement as I can provide.

It's been a few hours now, Jay's bent forward over his knees with his hands clasped.

My hand is resting on his back, the silent contact between us offering comfort and support.

"Are you telling people we're over?" Jay's back becomes even more rigid under my hand; I curse myself silently at not being able to keep the question at bay anymore.

"What?" His tone seems genuine with shock.

"Nothing. Sorry." I push down the question that's been gnawing at me since Will said it.

"Erin." Jay sits up to turn to me.

"You should eat." I look at the time on my phone frowning.

"I'm not hungry."

"I know, but you should still eat something. I'll go get us some good okay?"

"I don't want to eat Erin." Jay's shaking his head frustrated.

"Please Jay. Take care of yourself."

"Okay." He finally concedes, I move to squeeze his hand gently before going in search of food.

Jay POV

I watch Erin leave with a frown, thrown by her sudden question.

Gratitude edges in to take its place when I think about how amazing she has been, offering me support.

I rub my temples tiredly, unable to stop thinking about how Erin could offer me support with my PTSD too. The reason for leaving seems rash to me now, but knowing in my haste to walk out and break down and deal alone, I've hurt Erin to the point where she too needs time now.

The moment in the break room comes to mind, deep down I'd hope she would tell me to take my time and she'd be there waiting to help when I was ready. That she could handle it.

My heart broke when she admitted she needs time, the pain in her eyes and her inability to keep tears at bay a slap in the face.

She trusted me and I walked out on her, after keeping a big part of my life a secret.

"Hey man."

"Hey Will." Will takes a seat across from me and puts his head in his hands.

"You hear anything more?" I ask, taking in his posture.

"Not yet."

"Is that good or bad?" I'm almost afraid to ask.

"Don't know Jay."

"I'm sorry man." He brings his head up to look at me.

"What?"

"You know what." I nod at him.

"Jay I can't judge you. Besides I know you have reasons to be distant with dad."

"I hope I can get a chance to change them." My eyes drop to my hands.

"Think you can forgive him?"

"I don't know. But I think I'd like to try." My confession is quiet.

"I hope you can."

"Did Erin come find you before?" I look back up, changing the subject.

"Yeah, did she leave?" Will looks around for any sign of her.

"Nah, she's just getting food." I shrug, narrowing my eyes.

"I was surprised to see her."

"Me too… I shouldn't have been though. That's the problem." I shake my head, disappointed in myself.

"Jay, don't be so hard on yourself."

"Did you say something to her?" Will looks taken aback.

"Like what?"

"Like us being over for good?" The look on his face answers the question before he even opens his mouth.

"Shit man. Yeah. It just came out, I was upset…"

"Fuck. She probably thinks I told you that. She asked if I've been telling people we're over." I drag my hand down my face, feeling guilt.

"I'm sorry Jay. I was just lashing out."

"Because I'm here?"

"Yeah, but Erin knocked some sense into me. I'm glad you're here Jay." I nod, letting silence settle around us for a few minutes.

"The guilt is eating away at me Will."

"Because you're a good man. Look what dad did was wrong… but he's still our dad."

"I know." I see Erin approaching us over Will's shoulder, food in hands.

"Hey Will." Erin offers him a smile as she places the food down.

"Hey."

"I've got extra, help yourself Will."

"Nah, not hungry."

"That's what your brother said. But eat." I watch Erin slide a sandwich over to Will, her gaze leaving no room for argument.

She then does the same with me; I offer her a smile before picking it up.

We're silent as we eat, Erin's eyes flicking between Will and I casually.

"Guys." Erin's voice gets our attention as she nods over to Dr Rhodes who is making his way to us; we all stand up to face the news.

My posture is full of tension as I brace myself for the worse; Erin's hand slips into mine and offers a comforting squeeze.

"The surgery went as well as we could expect. We had to put him on bypass to repair the blocked arteries and restore blood flow to his heart."

"Is he going to be okay?" I finally ask when I can work out how to use my mouth.

"We'll monitor him closely but he should be fine, he'll have to take precautions to avoid another heart attack."

"Can we see him?" Will asks.

"Yeah, he'll be out for a few hours yet but you can see him."

"I'll let you two spend some time with him then. Do you need anything before I take off?" Erin's hand is slipping from mine; I hold it tighter not ready for her to let go.

"Stay. Please."

"Okay." Our hands are still joined as we follow Will through the hospital.

My feet stop when I see my dad through the glass doors, he looks so weak and small. It's a stark contrast to the man I remember from years ago, guilt eats away at me again and I'm unsure how to move.

"Jay?" Erin whispers gently bringing me back to the present.

"What do I even say to him?"

"Whatever you feel."

"It doesn't seem like the time or place to have it out."

"Then tell him you're glad he's okay, that you will work it all out later. But you're here for him." Erin offers gently, no pressure.

"Okay." Erin waits until I'm ready to join Will in the room, he's looking at dad's chart and monitors analyzing everything.

I take a seat on one side of the bed; Erin sits on the arm of the chair her hands going to my shoulders.

After a few hours they remove dad's breathing tube, advising us he's breathing on his own which is a good sign he'll wake soon.

It's been a slow few hours when Erin's phone buzzes; she checks it and frowns before looking at me apologetically.

"I'm sorry, I gotta go."

"It's okay." She stands up from the seat and I do too, bringing her in for a hug.

"Thanks for being here." I whisper into her neck.

"Always." She pulls away to caress my cheeks gently, her hazel eyes looking into mine. My forehead drops against hers, wishing to feel her lips against mine.

Erin pulls away to wave goodbye at Will before exiting the hospital room, leaving a chill where her warmth use to be.

"Jay?" My heart stops at the voice, I slowly turn around to see my dad's eyes open and trying to focus on me.

"Dad!" Will calls out as he begins to fuss around; dad pulls him into a hug stopping Will in his tracks.

"You scared us." Will whispers as he pulls away, dad looking over at me again.

"Son, come give your old man a hug." His arms are an open invitation, after only a moment hesitation I step forward and hug him tightly not caring about the tears slipping down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry dad. I just-" Despite the circumstances the apology taste bitter in my mouth.

"Stop. I'm the one who is sorry. I'm just glad you're here." He holds me tighter, making up for lost time.

"We can talk about it later." I promise him, pulling away knowing nothing good would come from discussing it now.

"I'd like that."

Once Doctor Rhodes has checked on dad and gone through post surgery care, it's just the three Halstead men in the room.

"Was that her?"

"Who?" Confusion in my tone.

"The girl you were hugging when I woke up. Is that her? Will told me a while back you were moving in with someone." It hits me in the chest, both the reminder he's been hearing of my life from someone else and that Erin and I no longer live together.

"Yeah, that's her. But it's complicated right now."

"She's beautiful."

"Yeah. She is." I agree.

"Complicated how?" I sigh when he presses again.

"Just complicated. I'm sure you understand that. Had plenty of excuses over the years." Hints of anger are laced in my accusation.

"That's not fair."

"Yeah well, life's not fair. That's what you've always told me." My blue eyes stare at him in challenge.

"Jay, let's give dad some space. Time to rest. We'll come back tomorrow." Will diffuses the situation before it can escalate.

"You came back." Dad's tone is surprised when I enter the room the following day.

"Guess so." I take a seat and for minutes we sit in awkward silence until Will picks up the conversation. I watch quietly as they interact.

My phone buzzing in my pocket jolts me back to reality, I smile when I see Erin's name flash on the screen.

"Excuse me." I walk out of the room and press accept.

"Hey." I whisper quietly, putting space between myself and the room.

"Hey Jay. I just wanted to check in today. I got your text last night saying he woke up, is he okay?" I can't help but smile, just hearing her voice.

"Look's like he'll be fine."

"Good… but are you okay?" I'm silent and Erin sighs into the phone.

"What happened Jay?"

"I couldn't keep my cool last night, he just makes me so angry."

"Can I do anything?" She offers quietly.

"You're doing it." My tone is quiet; I hear Hank's loud voice in the background, summoning her.

"It's okay, go. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, call me if you need anything." I promise her this and she hangs up.

Immediately I wish to call her back again just to hear her voice, feeling alone now that she's not here. I wish to tell her the thing I need is to have her back in my arms again.

Regret fills me, knowing I made the wrong call walking out on us instead of dealing with my past together.

This past day has reminded me how short life is and how important the people you love are. More importantly it shows Erin will always be by my side, she can handle it.

I walk back into the room to find Will and dad looking at me.

"Was that her?" My dad can't help but question.

"Who?" I ask, fully aware.

"You're girlfriend."

"Don't know if I can call her that. I think I screwed it up." I sit down with a sigh.

"She was here son, you haven't screwed it up past the point of fixing it. I saw that hug." I roll my eyes at his smirk, annoyance filling me at his lack of knowledge on me.

"My ex showed up in town. Turns out we're still married." The last words are meant to hurt him; a father not knowing his son is married.

"You got married?" His face is full of hurt and confusion; I nod at him not giving anything more on the subject out of spite.

"When Jay got back from his last tour, he was in Vegas for a funeral. She was there too. It was a stupid drunken mistake which he thought was in the past when she showed back up." Will steps in, trying to explain the tension away.

"And you never told Erin." Dad assumes looking over at me.

"No."

"So she kicked you out?" I try and push the irritation aside to answer his question.

"No… surprisingly. If you knew her, her past… you'd be surprised given her trust issues. But I fought for her to trust me… only to leave her." Anger is in my voice, directed at myself. Words tumble out, unsure why I'm even sharing them with a father who is practically a stranger.

"You walked out?" I just shrug at him.

"I wasn't in a good way when I got back from Afghanistan, I pushed it down instead of dealing with it. Seemed like pretending it didn't exist was a better alternative than drinking myself to death. Until I couldn't pretend anymore."

"Jay, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you." I just shake my head at him, my bitterness only rising. I try for a deep breath, imagining Erin calming me.

"You getting help?"

"I'm going to a PTSD support group." I admit, knowing this isn't the time to get into an argument.

"Why did you think Erin couldn't be by your side while you did?"

"I didn't know if she could handle it. Which sounds like bullshit even to my own ears. I just felt like getting my head right was on me, I should do it alone."

"And then go back to her?"

"Yeah. If she would even take me back." I'm staring at the hospital floor, easier to carry on with the conversation.

"Don't you think she should be with you while you push through all this? Be with you on the journey, like a partner should. Have each others backs." My eyes fly to his at that.

"You're honestly going to lecture me about being a good partner?" Dad's eyes drop before rising to me again.

"You'll be different when you come out the other side of this, you can't just try and slip back into her life. It's not fair on either of you."

"She said she needs time." I shrug.

"You lied to her, she was blind sighted with the fact you're married. But wanted you to stay, you left her."

"It's not that simple." I grit my teeth.

"Did you walk out or not?"

"Yes, but-"

"Guess you're more like you're old man than you thought." My eyes are cold as they stare into his seriously.

"You don't know me. You don't know everything. This is nothing like what you did."

"Tell me." He prompts.

"It's a long story."

"I have time."

"It's personal." My tone is short; making it clear this line of questioning is over.

"I'm your dad." I scoff at him humorless.

"Could have fooled me."

"Jay." Will's voice is urgent and reprimanding.

"It's okay Will, he has right to be angry." I just scoff again and raise my eyebrows.

"You'd think given the circumstances though…" Will trails off, his eyes challenging me.

"Oh. Like when mum was dying and you and dad were no where around?"

"Jay, look I-"

"You know what? Save it. I was wrong. I can't handle this now, not with everything I'm dealing with." I stand up and make my way towards the door.

"Jay, stay. Please." My father's tone is pleading.

"I'm glad you're okay dad. I'll see you later."

A/N: Obviously not much Linstead yet. Next chapter picks up with Erin and Jay hashing it out. Then Jay, Erin and his dad? Jay and his dad talking? Meh, haven't worked it all out yet.

I've started with the Linstead stuff though. Let me know your thoughts/ ideas on what could happen.

:)