Hiya, new story. Hope you like it.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Boosh. Wish i did. Unfortunately, that privlidge goes to Noel Fielding and Julian Barrett (comic geniuses!).
"Here in my car I feel safest of all, I can lock all my doors it's the only way to live in cars"
"VINCE! IF YOU DON'T TURN THAT OFF I'LL THROW THAT STEREO OUT OF THE WINDOW!"
"Here in my car I can only receive I can listen to you It keeps me stable for days In cars"
"VINCE!"
"Here in my car Where the image breaks down Will you visit me please? If I open my door In cars"
"VINCE FOR GOD SAKE SHUT UP"
"Here in my car I know I've started to think…"
"ARGH!"
"…"
"Thank you."
"Howard?"
"What?"
"That stereo cost me a lot of money."
"You should just be thankful I didn't throw you out of the window."
"Don't threaten me or Bollo will slash you up!"
"I'd like to see him try. What you fail to remember sir is that I am a black belt in karate."
"No you're not. You can't even do origami."
"Excuse you sir, my paper swan is second to none."
"It's rubbish… it doesn't even swim."
"It's paper!"
"Naboo's paper swan swims."
"Does it?"
"Yeah. Naboo's great! Remember when I wanted that slide and he bought me a helter-skelter? Oh and the time when I asked for a…"
"Okay, I get the picture Naboo's brilliant."
"He really is. Oh d'you remember the time when…?"
"Vince." warned Howard
"What?"
"I'm not interested in how great Naboo is."
"So why did you bring him up?"
"I didn't. You did."
"Oh yer" Vince grinned. "do you think Naboo would fix my hi-fi?"
"ARGH!"
"Howard, come back. Don't storm off. Where are you going?"
"Out."
"Howard…Howard…"
Vince ran to the window. "Howard. Come back you idiot!" Howard looked up at the window and stuck his tongue out. "And you say you're more mature than me." laughed Vince
"I am." shouted Howard and walked off down the street.
Vince grinned happily and went over to his wardrobe. He stroked his new suit grinning like a fool. One day to go.
Howard walked along the street trying very hard not to skip. He didn't know what had come over him in these last few months. He'd become more and more happy. He constantly found himself singing pop classics. He'd begun to find his jazz records a little depressing. He'd even thrown out his beige clothes and replaced them with Hawaiian shorts and flowery shirts. He'd been well and truly 'Vinced'. He had even begun to enjoy the attention of others and he simply couldn't wait for tomorrow. It would be the best day of his life. The first day of the rest of his life. But he still needed to pick up the present he'd ordered. That perfect present.
"Morning Mr Moon."
"Morning."
"You come to collect the gift?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Two minutes. Margret's got it out back."
"No problem. Take your time."
"You're not angry?"
"I couldn't be angry. Not today."
"Oh yes. It's the big day tomorrow, isn't it? Congratulations."
"Thank you very much."
Two minutes later the withered old man reappeared with a small black box covered in colourful stars and sequins.
"Here…" smiled the man "I trust this will be to your requirements."
"Thanks. It is blue isn't it?"
"Yes. I made sure it was blue."
"Okay thanks a lot. You can come tomorrow if you're not doing anything."
"You know Mr Moon I would very much like that."
"Okay, see you tomorrow then."
Howard left the small shop and opened the box to reveal a beautiful necklace. The stone was so blue that it almost blinded Howard. He grinned, oh he was going to be in Vince's good books now. This would make up for ruining the hi-fi. Howard raced back to the flat as he turned the corner onto the street he could here Vince singing. Howard smiled to himself 'idiot' he thought as he opened the door and walked upstairs.
"It's cold outside And the paint's peeling off of my walls There's a man outside In a long coat, grey hat, smoking a cigarette"
"VINCE!" "Now the light fades out And I wonder what I'm doing In a room like this"
"VINCE, WILL YOU STOP SINGING THERE'RE PEOPLE IN GLASGOW WHO DON'T LIKE GARY NUMAN!"
"There's a knock on the door And just for a second I thought I remembered you."
"VINCE!"
"What?" asked Vince poking his around his bedroom door.
"I've got a present for you."
"Really?" asked Vince excitedly.
"Yeah. Now you can either open it now or you can leave it till…oh." said Howard as Vince pulled the top off the box.
"Oh my god!" squealed Vince. "Is this mine?"
"Well I don't think it will suit me."
"It's gorgeous." said Vince flinging his arm around Howard's neck.
"Okay, no need for that."
"Don't be so stupid." giggled Vince "Hey and this means I've got something blue and something new. And I'm borrowing some magic boots off Naboo and you're old so I've got everything."
"I am the same age as you sir."
"I know. But I haven't got anything old." moaned Vince
"Well, go down to the Nabootique and look for something old."
"Brilliant idea." said Vince running down the stairs.
"He'd better not be going to my shop." lisped Naboo as a Vince shaped blur shot past him.
"He's looking for something old."
"Wont you do?" asked Naboo angrily
"Oh, everyone's a comedian today aren't they? If I were you I'd…"
SMASH
Naboo and Howard glanced at the stairs.
"If he's broken anything valuable I'll kill him."
"Look whatever he's broken I'll pay for." said Howard
"I know you will" said Naboo angrily "The sooner you two go on your honeymoon the better."
Howard beamed at Naboo. The excitement of the upcoming wedding and honeymoon was too much happiness for a typically miserable person like Howard to absorb. He felt certain he would explode with this amount of excitement. Naboo broke his thoughts as he said
"I don't here any whinging."
"What?"
"Vince has just broken something."
"And?"
"So, why isn't he up here trying to persuade me it wasn't his fault?"
Naboo had a point. It wasn't like Vince to keep quiet after he'd done something stupid. Howard and Naboo went quickly downstairs to the shop. Howard saw the smashed bottle and the purple liquid on the floor, but no Vince.
"Oh no!" gasped Naboo
"What?" asked Howard anxiously
"I forgot to turn the open/closed sign around this morning."
"Naboo." Howard frowned "Where's Vince?"
"I don't know. Ring him." Howard went to the see-through phone on the counter and rang Vince's mobile.
To his surprise the familiar 'Cars' ring tone came within the room. Howard and Naboo looked at each other and then at the purple puddle. Howard took a tentative step towards it.
"Vince?" he said. There was no reply. "Vince? Stop messing around." Naboo looked a little concerned as Howard approached the edge of the puddle.
"Howard, don't go any further. I don't know what that is." Howard peered over the side of the puddle and was amazed to see a huge forest.
"Vince?" he whispered crouching down get a better view. "Are you in there?"
"No." came Vince's voice from a cupboard. "I'm in here." Howard stood up angrily as Vince opened the door.
"You flaming idiot! I thought you'd fallen in." Howard said angrily.
"Sorry" Vince grinned. "I thought Naboo would be angry because I broke the bottle." Howard smiled as he stood up and took a step towards Vince.
"NO!" yelled Naboo
"HOWARD!" screamed Vince as Howard was swallowed up by the puddle. It was too late. Vince could only watch on helplessly as Howard fell to the forest below.
Thanks for reading! Please leave me a lil review because they make me smile.
Thank youuuu.
Sisi xx