Disclaimer: I don't own SPN.

This idea actually occurred to me late at night, when I was reading schmoopy Destiel smut (as you do) and was struck by the realisation that stuff never goes wrong for them in fanfiction. Sure, you've got your angst and that sort of stuff that goes wrong…but you never see them make silly little mistakes when kissing, or mess up during sex so badly that they're laughing too hard to get back in the mood. Thus, this fic was born.

(Also, I'm getting a short horror story of mine PUBLISHED in a BOOK and writing that broke my writer's block, so yippee!)

"You what?"

Cas just shrugged, irritating Dean with how careless this gesture was in comparison to the bombshell he'd just dropped.

"I'm in love with you. I have been for years."

Dean stared at him, gaping. How could this fucker just drop a love confession on him and stand there, cool as a cucumber? That was so not fair!

"Dean?" Cas' brow furrowed with worry. "Are you okay?"

"I – uh –" Dean said – rather intelligently, he thought. "You what me?"

Cas rolled his eyes. Dean couldn't even find it in him to be apologetic for teaching the ex-angel this bad habit.

"I. Love. You," Cas enunciated. "And I know that you love me back. I've felt your longing for years."

All of the blood drained from Dean's face.

"You've what?" he croaked. "You – you knew all this time and you just sat around and pretended like nothing was –"

"I knew that if I was to tell you, you would panic and push me away and I might ruin our relationship," Cas interrupted. "And quite frankly, I didn't want that. I settled for being your best friend, if only to have you in at least one capacity. But I'm tired of waiting. If you decide to never speak to me again, at least I can tell myself that I was honest. I've grown sick of hiding secrets. Where has that ever gotten us?"

Dean's mouth just opened and closed like a fish. Cas' bright blue eyes – the eyes that Dean had dreamed about for years, and jerked off to many times – crinkled in pain as his face fell.

"I understand if you don't want to pursue a romantic relationship in spite of your feelings towards me. I just hope that this doesn't change anything between us."

Dean's stomach jolted when Cas turned to leave the room.

'Go after him, you asshole!' a voice shouted in his head. 'Don't let him leave you again!'

Before he knew what he was doing, Dean was crossing the room to snag Cas' sleeve. Cas frowned as he was yanked around and said, "Dean, what –?" but was cut off when Dean grabbed Cas' hair roughly with his other hand and pulled the ex-angel in for a kiss.

It was quite possibly the best kiss of Dean's life. Cas' lips were plump and chapped and he let out a soft, surprised sound and melted into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Dean's neck to press their bodies together –

At least, that was how Dean was going to choose to remember it. In actuality, the kiss went very differently. But Dean was going to bury that and suppress it for the rest of his damn life because there was no way he was going to admit that he – Dean Winchester, kissing and sex extraordinaire – had been the one to fuck it up.

What really happened was that Dean's hand – tangled in Cas' hair – caught in the dark locks and caused Cas to give a pained gasp. This made Dean's heart skip a panicked beat as he pulled back to ask what was wrong, but Cas didn't seem to get the message that they weren't kissing in that moment and he kept leaning in to catch Dean's lips with his own. Unable to retreat in time, his forehead smashed into Dean's nose and sent brilliant, lancing pain jolting straight up Dean's face, right into his brain.

"Fuck!" Dean bellowed, automatically doubling over and cupping his nose with the hand that had been holding Cas' sleeve. Not realising that he still had a grip on Cas' hair, he tried to bring his other hand to his nose and he ended up ripping his fingers out of Cas' messy hair and evoking a yelp from the ex-angel.

"Oh my – Dean, I'm so, so sorry!" Cas said frantically, grabbing Dean's wrists in an attempt to pull his hands away and assess the damage. "I can't apologise enough –"

That was when Dean burst into hysterical laughter, despite this causing his nose to throb even more. He was vaguely aware of Cas giving him an alarmed look but all he could do was laugh harder and try not to choke on the blood trickling down his throat from his nasal cavity.

"Are you okay, Dean?" Cas said warily. Dean nodded, coughing up a bit of blood into his hand and then straightening up.

"Only you, Cas," he said thickly. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to a surprised Cas' lips, swallowing the surprised gasp that Cas let out, neither of them caring about the fact that his mouth tasted like blood. "Only you."