Unfaithful

Hermione knew it was wrong. She was a married woman after all. And he had a wife.
It was improper.
Scandalous.
And yet she couldn't stop.

That wasn't to say she didn't love her husband. Ron was her high school sweet heart. That was why she couldn't leave. The sole reason she chose an affair.

It's unclear how it started. Hermione had been a devoted wife and loving mother for the past 5 years. When Ron had kissed her in the chamber of secrets, all those years before, Hermione saw a flash of her future. Happy. Full of love. She never imagined this.

It had started of wonderfully. Their first date was in a little coffee shop. Ron had acted like a goofball and they had squabbled the whole way back home but it was perfect for Hermione. All the feeling Hermione had been fighting were finally set free and she loved him like there was no tomorrow. He treated her like a princess and Hermione couldn't imagine life any other way. They started their life together almost immediately. They both knew this was what they wanted and were married within a year and no one was surprised when they announced their first child shortly after moving out of the burrow.

Hermione didn't know the reason she fell for another man. Looking back, she didn't even remember how it had started.

Hermione had just been promoted to head healer of the long term damages ward of the criminally insane unit in London. She had worked dammed hard to get to where she was now. She achieved the highest N.E. that Hogwarts had seen since Albus Dumbledore, she had then spent a year volunteering at the unit to gain experiences, and since qualifying, had spent numerous hours on the ward learning all she can. She was very dedicated.

She had been very surprised to see Draco Malfoy walk in on his first day of work. Although he had been cleared of all war crimes following the final battle along with his mother, they were not often seen in public. They were seen as lepers. Rumours flew for the first year after the final battle. Draco Malfoy was not seen for 6 months and Narcissa had moved to another country.

Lucius Malfoy had been caught trying to escape with his family during the last battle by two death eaters. Two cures hit him at the same time, one to immortalise his body in a state of living death while the other conjured randomised episodes of psychosis. As a result, Malfoy sr. endured months in a comatose state while awakening once in a blue mood to hallucinations and impulsive, destructive behaviours, only to fall back to oblivion. These death eaters had also calved TRAITOR into his forehead for all to see. He had permanently been branded. A constant reminder.

Lucius Malfoy had never been cleared of his war crimes. Instead he was a permanent resident of the ward Hermione had now taken charge of. She often wondered if Draco's interest in becoming a mediwizard was due to his father's current state. Although many had tried, none had been successful in undoing the dark curses that riddles the older Malfoy's body. Perhaps this was Draco's goal. Hermione could only guess. Draco never spoke about his father.

Or any of his family really. Hermione knew he was married to Astoria Greengrass because the daily prophet had done a full page spread on the wedding and there was a gossip column devoted to the Greengrass sisters which covered every aspect leading up to the wedding. Although Hermione had never had the misfortune of knowing either of the sister, it was difficult not to know at least something about the gruesome twosome. The heiresses, famous for being famous and dating celebrity after celebrity. Pathetic.

Hermione knew Draco also shared a child with Astoria. A boy. Somewhere around the same age as Rose. But again, Draco never spoke of his family. Hermione often wondered why this was because she noticed a picture on his office desk of him struggling to keep hold of a 2-year-old Scorpius who was wriggling out of his father's grasp. Hermione liked the picture. It showed Draco as half way human with a relax smile of his face and a full on grin as his son finally achieved his goal and was let loose. He looked happy.

It had started as a strange friendship. Both were very reserved with each other at the beginning. Everyone knew of their past relationship during their formative school years. The fights. The competition to be the best student. The arguments. The curses which flew back and forth between Gryffindor and Slytherin royalty. In fact, in the first few months of the two working together, it was like nothing had changed.

Eventually the two were hauled up in front of the ward manager and told they needed to sort out their differences or find somewhere else to work. A truce was called. Begrudgingly. Both agreed they were adults who wanted to leave the past in the past. It didn't stop sly comments from being exchanged though. A passion to hate that would never die down.

And somewhere between acting like civil human beings and forgetting to undermined one another, they feel into a sort of friendship. Hermione valued the intelligent conversation he provided. Between her children's limited vocabulary and Ron's utter lack of similar interests, it wasn't something Hermione got a lot of. After all she didn't marry Ron for his brain.

The two exchanged idea's, theories on medical knowledge, debated (heatedly at times) about political issues, novels they had both read and social economic matters which were of great importance to them. They shared a lot of similar interests, which should not have been a surprise. They were both intellectuals yearning for more knowledge and both were widely cultured, they even liked the same greasy spoon café in Diagonally. They exchanged a lot of convocation, a lot of passion and somewhere along the line, a kiss or two.

As much as Hermione loved her husband – it wasn't as perfect as they made it out to be. Both worked full time, odd hours and what hours they did have was spent bickering as Ron was short tempered and having a hard time at work. He went to work with Harry in the Aurors department but he wasn't as good an Auror as he had expected and was finding it extra challenging. It didn't help that Harry had excelled so much either. On top of this, they saw very little of each other due to the odd hours and looking after the kids. They had very little alone time, which Hermione often thought was a good thing. If they didn't see each other, they wouldn't be able to see the cracks in their relationship. They were both running from the problem. Yes, they loved each other, but were they in love?

Hermione valued Ron's friendship, his loyalty and familiarity. He was always kind, a gentleman but there was no spark. Not anymore. Hermione no longer felt anticipation when they went to bed. The butterflies in her stomach had flew away. The passion had gone out like a light. Well, it had for Hermione.

Ron was trying very hard to keep everyone happy, Hermione could see this. He had tried to be more romantic and shake things up a bit but it no longer held any appeal to Hermione. If Ron noticed, he didn't say anything. Nor did he mention about Hermione's late nights at work or the amount of over time she was clocking. Hermione wondered if he didn't say anything because he wanted things to stay as they were. He wanted to stay as a family, even as an unhappy one.

And while Ron was trying to ignore the breakdown of his marriage. Hermione fallen for another man. Willing or not, it had happened. It was wrong. On every level. Hermione knew this but still couldn't stop herself. It was the stolen kisses and flirtatious comments. The slight touch of his hand on her arm or the feel of his lingering gaze. It was the anticipation of when she would get to see him. A secret rendezvous. Hidden love notes. The passion.

Danger. It was dangerous to play this game. They both knew. If Ron ever found out. Or Astoria. They were dead. Everything was on the line. It was exciting. Hermione had never felt more alive.

At times Hermione found herself overwhelmed with guilt. She was sure Ron knew. He knew something. Knew of the affair, Hermione was sure. She could see it in his eyes. Feel the betrayal when he looked at her. Smell the disappointment that lingered all around. She knew he must feel numb, unloved. And yet she couldn't stop.

Hermione didn't want to hurt Ron. That was never her intention. That's why all the secrecy. Why she chose an affair rather than a divorce. Besides she never meant to fall in love.

It killed Hermione sometimes, knowing he knew. She would be getting ready for work, applying her make up or running around after the kids. He would be getting himself ready too or helping with breakfast but she saw him looking. Every morning was the same. He would always ask.

"How long till you get back?"

And each time she replied with a variation of the same lie,

"I won't be long. It's the new system. I have to work overtime, you know that."

But no. She was going to be with Draco. She was taking advantage of Ron and they both knew it. But Hermione was his life; her and the kids. And that is how she rationalised it. Stopped her feeling guilty. She was doing this to keep herself happy and in turn her family. But she knew she was killing him. Slowly. Painfully. He knew it. She knew it. And still he said nothing.

But saying nothing wasn't an option for Hermione anymore. The secret was killing her. She tucked the kids in on a Saturday night and imagined another man standing in the doorway looking in. Ron hugged her from behind while she was doing the dishes and it felt wrong. The body shape was different. His smell. It no longer felt like home.

She didn't want to sneak around. She couldn't do this to Ron any more. Other people could see the strain on their marriage. Harry had even commented. It wasn't fair. She deserved to be happy too. Which is why her and Draco had agreed it was time to move on. They needed to be together. But they needed to do it properly. They made a pact. They would both break up with their spouses and create their own family together. Joint custody of their individual children and perhaps a few together. It was their time to be happy. Even if it meant destroying so many lives. They would be happy together.

Our Love. His Trust.
I Might As Well Take A Gun And Put It To His Head.
Get It Over With.
I Don't Want To Do This.
Anymore.