Reflections of a Lost Love
Disclaimer: Max, Zack, and
the rest of the x-5 mentioned belong to James Cameron and Fox. So don't sue.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Max stared the ceiling,
angry and shocked at what Madame X had told her. Zack dead? How could that be??
They defeated Manticore, they blew up the DNA lab, what was Madame X doing
still surviving?? There was absolutely no doubt in Max's mind that Brin had
died with the DNA lab. But, why, why, Zack?? Her big brother shouldn't have
saved her life. She would have rather die, then let the rest of her
"siblings' survive without their C.O. Zack meant so much, to her, so much
more than Logan did. As for Logan,
let him think her dead, everyone else already did. She could only hope that
Krit, Syl, Zane and all the rest, would avenge Zack's death. She didn't need avenging;
she was supposed to be dead already anyway. She hadn't wanted her big brother,
her love, to die on her account. She tried so hard, when she heard his voice,
saying, "Fight them, Maxie, you gotta fight them." But, she couldn't, no
matter how hard she tried. She didn't know why, she hadn't jumped to dodge the
bullet, perhaps it was the shock of seeing her clone, a version of her, an x-7.
Anyhow, she feverishly wished now, that she had. If she had, she and Zack would
be free; they and the others could leave. They'd be celebrating now, if not for
her. Most importantly, Zack would still be alive. No matter how she looked at
it, Zack was dead because of her. She, had indirectly, killed her brother. She
had killed her brother and her love. She could've looked at several different
ways, but, she knew now that she didn't love Logan. Maybe she never did. All she had ever had with Logan was an attraction, an infatuation. But, that was it.
It didn't matter to her, whether or not Logan loved her. It didn't matter at all. All that mattered
was, Zack. But, Zack was gone, dead, and invertly by her hand. Besides, even if
Logan loved her, she wouldn't care, because she wasn't worthy
of anyone's love. Not Logan's, not Krit's, not Syl's, not her home girl
Original Cindy's, and not Zack's. Definitely not Zack's. Zack loved her, and
she knew this too. She knew it, she knew it, and she didn't want to admit it to
herself, or to Zack. Now, it was too late. She had been hiding behind the
fuckin' facade that Zack was her older brother, that it would be disgusting to
see him as anything but an older brother. But, she had been stupid, very
stupid, to think that Zack was just acting on brotherly responsibilities, by
ending his life for her. She knew now, that she had spent far too long, trying
to ignore Zack's obviously more than brotherly feelings for her, and trying to ignore
her feelings for him. Now, it was too late. Zack was dead, gone, gone, forever.
Never to protect his brothers and sisters again, never to give orders, never to
devote his life, to running away, and to relocating. It was all her fault.
"Please, God, take good care of Zack, please end his eternal
suffering." Max whispered, tears streaming down her face. "God,
please offer the power of forgiveness to my siblings, never let them know that
I, killed our brother. I have to live with that for the rest of my god-forsaken
life." Max lay there, sobbing, and begging for forgiveness.
TBC...................
