Summary: Katara's afraid that one day, he will have hidden himself away so perfectly that she won't be able to reach him anymore, but until that day comes she will keep on fighting.
Pairing: Katara/Sokka if you squint and look at it sideways, but you can also see it as a platonic relationship if you want
Masks
- i don't believe in perfect people but i do believe in you -
Sometimes she thought Sokka was like the sea. Lively, wild and unstoppable. Sometimes freezing, sometimes refreshing, sometimes getting on her nerves. And always unpredictable.
He had sides that not many people saw or could ever hope to see but she had known him for a long time. She knew every side, every rough edge of him, just like he knew her's. They were fitting together, like two pieces of a puzzle, in perfect balance. Some days, she even thought that they couldn't be without each other.
There was the Sokka that everyone saw – the loud, stupid, brash one, always complaining about being hungry or something other, making his corny jokes. She loved that Sokka because when he was content enough to complain, it meant that he was happy.
Then there was the smart, strong, confident Sokka. Only the people who got to fight with or against him got the chance to meet this boy. He didn't like to be like that all the time – for one, people would expect things of him and for the other, like he had told her once, it was just to much work for him. He didn't want to be the hero. He just wanted to protect her.
But there were sides to him, too, which she didn't like at all.
The cold, furious, ready to kill Sokka who appeared when someone was seriously threatening his family. She was a bit afraid of him then because every time he got like that, she knew that he could and would kill in cold blood if it was to save something dear to him. Without regret, without feeling guilty.
Someone she also didn't like to see was the sad, depressed and melancholic Sokka. She couldn't bear to look at this version of her brother. Every time she did, something inside of her would crack a bit more and she would curse this whole stupid war and wonder if winning it really is worth all this pain. His dark blue eyes would be almost black with hate and hidden suffering and if she allowed herself to stare into them just a bit longer she'd feel like she couldn't breathe. And then she'd hate, too, because they had done this to her family.
Whom she really missed, though, that was the Sokka he sometimes allowed himself to be just months prior. He was a bit of everything, making stupid jokes and at the same time strong and confident, traces of steely determination etched into the lines of his face. And his eyes, oh, they had been a maelstrom of emotions, so easy to see, screaming out at her – sad, loving, angry, hopefull – all caught in bright shining blue eyes and he didn't need to tell her he loved her because he just needed to look at her and she'd know.
But when she looked at him now his face was closed off, his true self hidden away. Sure, he was complaining and making stupid jokes, oogling some girl or other, appearing for all the world to see as if he were just a normal kid. It hurt. She knew he was so much more than that but the war had driven him to hide it all away, to hide himself away and she wondered if she'd done the same or if she was still the same girl that didn't know anything about war and death, that called ice and snow her home.
It was hard to hold on to him, he was making it so easy to let go. But she wouldn't, she couldn't. What would she do without her family? The one thing that made hoping worth it. So she didn't say anything when he hid himself away and instead allowed herself to drown in his eyes from time to time, just to see if he was still there. The mask, the warrior, the avenger, the tired one, the loving one.
And as long as she'd find everyone it would be okay. They could both hide if it meant they'd get through this all. As long as they stayed the same there was hope.
And hope was worth it, right?
Fin
I wrote this for the single reason that I absolutely adore this boy. Of course he's immature and downright stupid at times, but I also think that there's much more to him than you can see. Hope this turned out okay, I appreciate every comment you decide to leave!
Oh, and the line beneath the title is from some other story, I hope no one decides to sue me for stealing it or something... chuckles nervously
Shiruy