The Great Eboost Adventure

by: Flippy8490

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING RELATING TO PSYCH OR ANY COMPANIES OR PRODUCTS MENTIONED IN THE FOLLOWING. ALSO ALL FICTIONAL CHARACTERS THAT HOLD RESEMBLANCE TO REAL PEOPLE IS COMPLETELY COINCIDENTAL

"Why in all of everything that is holy and sacred do I not get cell service in my driveway but I do everywhere else" Thought Gus angrily to himself as he began to pull out of his driveway in his sleek dark blue car. Turning onto the road he noticed his trash had not been picked up that morning. Being a 19 year old college student living in an on campus apartment, he generated way more than he should. Sighing heavily he sped off down the road.

It was a gorgeous day. Just the right temperature, not too hot or too cold. The sun was glistening off the tar making it seem like a pathway of diamonds his car was drifting over. Reaching over to turn on the radio Gus heard what sounded like crazy intense techno music coming from under his seat. Reaching down, he felt a phone vibrating and blasting out tunes that could be likened to anything coming out of a dance club. It was Shawn's cell phone.

Shawn and Gus had been best friends for most all of their lives and they spent every possible minute together. It was like they were attached at the hip; except for it was blatantly apparent they both had all their own independent bones. Pressing talk Gus raised the phone to his ear.

"Uhm Hello?"

"GUS!!! I lost my cell phone! Have you seen it?!"

"Shawn…….I just answered it"

"…..well that would definitely explain me calling myself and you picking up"

"Yes, yes it would"

"I feel sexy, let's rent a movie"

"You are not making me rent a porno again; I fell for that last time"

"Oh come on Gus, you know 'The Adventure' was a great movie. It moved me, it really did. I was sincerely moved."

"Yeah, to the pick me up"

"…..dude that was so random"

"And so isn't life, get used to it"

With that, Shawn hung up the phone leaving Gus on the other end listening to dead air.

Naturally Gus actually had to go pick Shawn up, so 20 minutes later Gus pulled into Shawn's Driveway across campus. Shawn came running out and jumped in the car.

"…….Lets Roll" said Shawn sliding on his brand new super killer sunglasses. Gus pulled out and headed towards the center of town.

Shawn pulled out his CD's as they cruised and began to blast the radio at unacceptable volumes.

"What is with the loud music Shawn!?" bellowed Gus attempting to override the insidiously loud radio.

"I'm way crazy tired, and I'm hoping this will punch me in the cerebellum and awaken me"

"…What is with all the big words?"

"Don't question me in my state Gus"

Right after uttering this, the low fuel light came on and Gus noticed it was time to get some gas before continuing downtown. Luckily they were passing a T-Bird station at the time so Gus quickly signaled and turned in. He parked near a pump and pumped the tank full of fuel.

"Shawn, do you want anything?"

"I'll come in; maybe they will have something that will wake me up"

Walking into the convenience store Gus went to the register to pay while Shawn strayed to the back half of the market. None of the sodas looked terribly appealing to Shawn as he scanned them quickly, only half awake.

Gus came over to meet Shawn after paying for the gas.

"See anything?"

"No nothing looks all that appet-WHAT IS THAT!?"

Shawn was drawn in by the metallic silver label of the drink that stat atop the fourth cooler from the wall in the back of the store. Glistening in Red lettering the can read "EBoost"

"Wow……..it's shiny. It's appealing. It's waking me up. I think its burning my retinas. I want it. I need it. Buy it Gus."

And with that Shawn walked out the door and back to the car.

Standing there in a shocked-but-this-is-nothing-new state, Gus grabbed the can of Eboost and muttered a plethora of unnecessary obscenities as he walked up front and purchased the insidiously shiny can.

Getting back in the car he handed it to Shawn. With a quick turn of the key they were speeding off down the highway.

Popping the top of the can, Shawn took his first swig of Eboost.

"Any good, Shawn?"

Shawn sat there staring at the can of Eboost, in a daze but not knowing totally how he felt. Looking at Gus, looking back to the road and then back to Gus again, for what seemed like five millennia, Shawn finally commented.

"I honestly have no opinion on that"

"……is it good?"

"I don't know"

"Is it refreshing?"

"I still cannot fathom words to describe this marvel"

"I want to taste it"

Shawn handed Gus the shiny can. Taking a swig from it Gus grimaced.

"That is an unnecessary amount of sugar"

"I think it's completely necessary" Shawn came back.

Turning into Kmart, Gus parked and turned off the car. He grabbed the door handle and kicked it open. Closing the door behind him he noticed Shawn was already more than halfway to the store.

"Typical" was all that ran through Gus's head.

Walking at a general speed Gus progressed toward Kmart. As he reached the store a hand grasped his shoulder. Making him jump Gus swung around to see it was Shawn.

"How did you do that?" asked Gus.

"I just went, I did it. I RAN. I RAN really fast. Like WOOSH!" As he said this his arms were flailing around communicating the acts through movement.

"I think you have had enough of that Eboost" Gus said while grabbing the can from Shawn. The can was empty.

Gus looked down in disbelief. Shawn has just polished that thing off in like five minutes.

"Shawn…no more Eboost, ever"

Quickly replying Shawn stated "I think i've decided"

"On?" Asked Gus Questioningly.

"That stuff is BANGIN!, That stuff is CRUNK!, I like it, to sum up my obscenely confusing words"

After a few seconds of silence Gus chimed in "Just don't drink anymore of it or you will-"

Cutting Gus off, Shawn screamed "OH MY GOD I LOVE PEEPS!" after catching a glimpse of the peeps display inside the Kmart doors. Shawn took off, running towards the display. Reaching the display Shawn grabbed a pack of the yellow ones and took off for electronics.

Gus took off after him, chasing him through the aisles.

"Shawn you are going to get us kicked out!"

Completely ignoring Gus Shawn stopped at the video game case, marveling over all of the games. This didn't last long, based on the fact that the Eboost gave Shawn the attention span of a newborn goldfish. He took off again headed for the food section. He scrambled up and down the aisles with Gus chasing him the whole way. He had begun to slow up until he spotted more Eboost in the cooler at the end of the aisle.

Gus, seeing the upcoming situation, cried out "Touch the Eboost and die Shawn"

It was too late; Shawn was already done paying for the Eboost and was headed out the door. Gus jetted outside. Shawn was standing in the door, already done with his energy drink. His eyes looked like they were ready to pop out of his head.

"Shawn…..are you okay"

Shawn just stared at Gus. Suddenly he began to jump up and down screaming and flailing frantically.

"IS IT BAD THAT I CAN'T FEEL MY BODY!!!!?" Shawn screamed while jumping.

"Yes it's bad, it's very bad, now stop."

"I can't stop, its controlling me, it's got my mind. AHHHHHH!!! WEEEE!"

By now there was a whole crowd of people formed around Shawn and Gus witnessing this marvel. A 19 year old man, jumping around like an 8 year old after eating all of their Halloween candy in one sitting.

"Shawn there are people watching you" Gus said calmly

"I'm famous!"

"No Shawn, you're an idiot"

"I'm a famous idiot!"

"No you're just an idiot"

"I can't see right!" yelled Shawn over the laughing crowd of people.

Right as he said this he stopped moving collapsing to the ground.

Gus took a relieving sigh as he watched Shawn pass out.

He grabbed Shawn and dragged him back to the car.

Driving back to his house Shawn finally woke up.

"What the HELL was that!? Gus questioned sharply

Shawn was silent.

"well……" wondered Gus. Finally after a 20 second lapse Shawn replied

"Dude you have my cell phone, I was missing it!"

"……………………………...WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Yelled Gus at the top of his lungs.

"Dude you really need to calm down. I think you need less coffee, it's really bad for you."

Gus was silent. So, Shawn had just made a complete ass of himself in front of everyone at Kmart and doesn't remember it or he just was pretending it never happened. Considering Shawn's ridiculously photographic memory, Gus safely assumed the latter. Regardless, Gus was silent, he had no response to this, much like Shawn had no response to Eboost. He decided it wouldn't matter if he said something or nothing at all. Gus shut his mouth, pretending it never happened and continued to drive Shawn and himself back to campus.