Craving
Bing Eating
Purging
Shame and Disgust
Diet
Tension
Craving
.
.
.
I wrote over and over in sloppy hand writing on the page of a small blue journal accompanied by drawings of the perfect figure. Which to me was malnourished and boyish.
A knock came at the door.
"Amelia?" A soft but masculine voice asked through the wood.
I scrambled to hide my note book under my pillow as I replaced it with some stupid teen magazine and flipped it open. "Yeah?"
"Dinner's ready.." My brother Matthew opened the door slightly and smiled at me, adjusting his glasses.
"Alright." I nonchalantly tossed the unimportant magazine on the floor as I got up from the star covered bed spread.
Matthew and I made our way down stairs to dining room just to see our mother and father sitting at the table.
"Hello Amelia, Matthew." Our abnormally gorgeous mother spoke.
Our father set down his News paper "Yes. Hello children."
We had the all American family. A father who worked at an office, a mother who was gorgeous. They were high school sweet hearts and had been married for 20 some years. Regardless of the fact that she was totally having an affair with our school's foot ball coach.
It was sickening almost. How normal we were. We weren't extraordinary in the slightest bit. It's not that I wanted to be amazing, or in the spot light. But my family is so average. It's not funny, or broken, or anything that would make an amazing reality show.
Well. I guess we aren't that average. Matthew and I were adopted. Our mother wasn't able to have children. Regardless, we were adopted together. Matthew actually is my twin.
"Amelia honey?" My mom spoke clearly, moving her red lips up and down.
"H-Huh?" I snapped back into reality. "Sorry.. What now?"
"Why don't you take some more mashed potatoes?" My father asked.
"Oh, uh.. No thanks Pops.. I'm not too hungry." I nibbled on my butterless bread.
"So how was school?" He asked, not really caring.
"Wonderful." I flashed a fake smile. He gave me a nod.
"Say Matthew, why haven't you tried out for any sports teams yet?" He frowned at the timid boy.
"Oh.. Well I didn't really want to, Papa... I'm sorry.." He fiddled with the sleeves of his red hoodie.
"And the kids have stopped picking on you, Matthew?" My mother asked.
Kids last year had bullied Matthew all of our sophomore year for some reason. He wasn't in any nerdy clubs, his grades were average, and I'm pretty sure that seventy five percent of the student body hadn't noticed him at all.
I asked Matthew if it was because they were jealous, or because he was nerdy.
He just told me they did it because they could.
"And you Amelia? Do the kids treat you well?" Mother asked again.
"Oh yes, I'm very popular." I nodded reassuringly.
Mother and Father didn't know that the kids had been bullying me. Matthew did, but when he confronted me I told him not to talk about it.
"Oh, ah well. I have to go finish some paper work. I'll be in my study, no one bother me." He sighed.
I saw a hurt look flash across my mother's flawless face, but it was soon masked by an uneasy and forced laughter. "Anyone want desert?"
"No. No thank you." My brother said politely before excusing myself.
I could never say no to her pumpkin pie. "Yes please." I said reluctantly.
How could I say yes? I don't want to be fat, do I?
Mother placed a plate of her pie in front of me and left. I began to eat.
With every bite I ate I felt a little bit of me dying inside.
I could feel myself getting fatter.
I could only eat half without feeling an ill feeling in my stomach. I quickly shoveled the remaining pie into the garbage can and made a mad dash towards the bathroom. I slammed the door shut and began to up chuck what looked like the very end of dinner and my just eaten pie as I held my hair out of the way.
Disgusting.
Author's note: okay guys. Please review and give me ideas and tell me what you think. Some of the events that occur in this are based off of things that happened to myself and some friends. So please be nice.