Not mine - wish they were.
"Congratulations Chief, it will be good to get back out on the street with you." The now official partners were returning to the loft from the celebration lunch that Simon and the rest of Major Crimes had insisted on treating Blair to after the Academy graduation that morning. "I know everyone else is as glad you're back as I am; I haven't been the easiest person to live with lately. The desk guard issues the 'storm warning' the second I step through the front doors." Jim grinned at Sandburg's look. "What you think I didn't know?"
Blair just rolled his eyes as they walked through the door. "I'm not surprised, but Rhonda will be devastated."
"Then we won't tell her." Grinning Jim grabbed a couple of beers and turned on the tv. The two set on the couch watching the first half of the Jags/Lakers game. Jim found his mind wandering to the last months. After the dissertation fiasco Jim had convinced Blair to hire a lawyer and get a settlement from the publisher, but he hadn't convinced him to let the lawyer loose to negotiate the best deal possible. Blair insisted a huge settlement would be too much of a news event and bring the whole mess into the spotlight again. Therefore, he was able to pay his student loans and have enough left for a decent car, but that was it. Jim had also tried to persuade him to continue at Ranier with another topic after William Ellison had his lawyers show them the error of their ways, but Blair decided he wasn't interested in the poisoned ivy walls of academia any longer.
During half time Jim headed to the kitchen for another beer and pulled an envelope from the jacket he'd discarded earlier. Handing both to Blair he opened his own bottle and set down."
"What's this man?"
"Happy graduation."
Blair turned the envelope over and over. "Open it Chief, it won't explode."
"You don't need to give me anything Jim. Staying on as your partner is present enough."
Curiosity won out however, and Blair opened the envelope. He stared at the papers for several seconds before turning to Jim. "This is, wow man, I can't . . ." He turned over the deed to the apartment next door. "Jim, I really appreciate the gesture, but I can't let you. . ."
"Chief," Jim interrupted, "you're an adult and need some of your own space. I've never regretted having you as a roommate, but we can't continue like this forever. You deserve more than a tiny room in my apartment. Spread out, enjoy your place, maybe find a girl." Blair blushed at the leer Jim sent his way. "We can put a door between the two places if you'd like. I'm not kicking you out; we can still eat together whenever we like – or watch tv."
"Besides, well, I, OK," Jim took a deep breath, "here goes. The last few months have convinced me how important you are in my life. While best friends don't have to live in each other's shadow, we do. I've managed while you were at the academy. Megan does a decent job of keeping me focused, but she's not you. I NEED my guide. I'll probably never reach a point where I don't. I know it's a bigger commitment than marriage – we just CAN'T split up. I'd eventually end up in that mental institute I was worried about. Chief, please accept this – I need your nearby, but you deserve your own life too. Please understa . . ."
"Jim, man, I get it! Relax!" Blair calmed the increasingly anxious Sentinel. "For the first time in my life I'll have a steady paycheck and can begin to pay you back for the help you've given me the last four years. This is just too much. I can't let you use your savings for this." We can work out a payment schedule and . . ."
"No way, think of it as back pay. Besides, everyone would tell you that you're a saint for putting up with me. I've been told I'm impossible to live with, even before your throw in being able to hear, smell and see every little thing. I have plenty of money, and I WANT to do this. If you try to repay me I'll just invest it all in a retirement account for you." Jim reflected for a moment. "Actually, that's not a bad idea; you think saving money is a waste and you'll need . . ."
Seeing where this was heading Blair quickly interrupted, "No Jim, I don't think it's a waste; I just never had any to save before. But you don't owe me any 'back pay.' You paid for most of the food and utilities for the last 4 years. The meager rent I managed occasionally doesn't begin to cover all you spent because of me. And I know what that apartment went for – that's not 4 years of salary unless you're . . . "
"Stop right there, Chief. It's not like you did nothing. You did most of the cooking and a good chunk of the cleaning. You also worked the equivalent of two full time jobs. Besides, our original agreement was only half fulfilled."
"What? Is there something you need me to do? I'm sor . . ." He stopped because Jim was muttering something about idiot guides who always assumed they were the problem.
"Chief, I was the one who didn't fulfill the bargain." At Blair's confusion he continued – hoping Blair would fall into his trap. "We agreed you'd help me with my senses, and you'd get your Ph.D. right?" He grinned inwardly at Blair's nod. "Well, do you have your Ph.D.?"
"But Sid, the media, I mean Naomi. . . " Jim grinned at Blair's inability to put together a coherent sentence.
"That was a 'yes or no' question. Do you have your doctorate?
"But ."
"Yes or no?"
"Well no, but."
"Are my senses under control?"
"Yes, but."
"I rest my case."
"That's not fair – Everyone already thinks I'm a freeloader who's spent the last four years mooching off your generosity, or stupidity, depending on whom you ask."
"Stop! Who's been saying such things? I want names now." The Sentinel rose up in fury over the insults to his guide.
"Let it go big guy. From their perspective it's not far off the mark. The important people know the truth. But this apartment is just more ammunition for them."
"They don't need to know it was a gift. They can just think you have a mortgage like the rest of the world. I AM doing this. That's final!"
"Ok" Blair sighed, "I know when I'm outgunned."
"Then you'll stop fighting me on this?"
"I guess you win. But this has to stop. I am an adult and will have money now to support myself. Besides, I'm actually doing better than if I had my Ph.D. I'd still have a mountain of student loans to pay back. And the pay scale for a detective is better than a first year professor."
Jim grinned; relaxing after winning this argument. It had actually been easier than he expected. There would probably be others in the future, but Sandburg was right. He had a paycheck now and wouldn't need the room and board Jim had provided in the past.
"Great! We need to stop by the lawyer's office at the end of the week to sign some papers. I don't know how he's managing it, but he said he'd make sure there weren't any gift taxes or penalties or anything."
"But how?"
"I don't know, and I don't care. He promised he could do it legally, and that was all I asked. Now, let's go take a look at your new place. There's the furniture in your room, but we'll need to make a list of anything else you'll need to get started. And you'll need to decide if you want to do any painting or remodeling before we move you in."
"Uh, Jim – were you serious about putting a door between us."
"Sure, if you want. I figure it will take some time for both of us to get used to things. But when you want some time to yourself or whatever you have to promise you'll let me know. I promise I won't take it personally."
"Ok – if you'll promise the same. Just, well."
"What is it?"
"I don't want this to become an excuse for not dealing with whatever problems come up. I mean, we kinda had to deal with things to survive; now we can ignore them easier."
"Chief, you know me. I don't often like to talk about feelings and such, but I am learning that it's an important part of any relationship. You might have to insist once in a while, but I want to keep things good between us. Some of it will disappear now you know. I won't care about wet towels or food in the living room as long as it's on your side of the place after all."
That night Blair lay in bed unable to sleep. He was now a cop with his own apartment; a year ago he never would have guessed what changes were coming. The idea of having his own place for the first time in his life excited him more than he expected. Finally, he could pick out colors and decorations for HIS place. They had spent the whole evening measuring windows and discussing furniture and color options. Finally winding down, Blair began drifting off to sleep content in the knowledge that their partnership was secure. After thinking over their discussion earlier Blair realized that the Sentinel needed to be assured that the guide was under his protection. The apartment was Jim's tempering of that need with a realistic solution they could both live with. Hearing Jim moving upstairs he whispered his thanks before finally dozing off.
Jim, also in bed, reflected over that last few months. He had minimized the problems while Blair was in the academy. He and Megan were both relieved their temporary partnership was ending. Zones had been more frequent and longer; nothing that caused any danger. But it was frustrating and tiring for both. He smiled at the memory of Blair's excitement over decorating his apartment. Blair's famous energy had taken hours to run out. Jim, knowing his taste differed quite dramatically from Blair's, stayed quiet and let Blair go on for what seemed like forever.
Now he listened to his roommate's heartbeat and breathing slow and deepen as Blair nodded off to sleep. The quiet "thank you, Jim" that drifted up the stairs eased the last of the tension. He hadn't realized until just that evening that he was terrified that Blair might leave. The Sentinel's anxiety level had risen slowly but dramatically over the last several weeks. At any suggestion that Blair would be leaving, whether real or imagined, Jim had to clamp down on the resulting panic. He would never ask Blair to stay with him for a lifetime; he deserved better.
Finally, as he began to worry for his future sanity the apartment next door had been put on the market. Willing to pay anything for the perfect solution he immediately put an offer down and instructed his real estate agent to do whatever he needed to ensure a sale, including increasing the offer.
Listening to Blair sleep, Jim finally relaxed, secure in the knowledge that his guide was safe. The Sentinel had demanded the guide's future security be assured and was satisfied with the answer. He knew the changes in their relationship coming in the future would cause some anxiety, but they could deal with anything, and their partnership would survive.