Her Last Gift

John knew that he shouldn't have left Marty, but Marty insisted that he go. She knew how important his job was to him and the baby wasn't expected for another month so she had told him to go.

Marty's pregnancy had been high risked from the very beginning and they had been warned that carrying the child to term would be extremely difficult. She had been heart-broken when the doctor's advised her to terminate the pregnancy, but she wouldn't do it. She was determined to give their child a chance at life despite the ominous warnings.

John had returned home from work to find Marty passed out at the bottom of the stairs.

He rushed over to her and checked her wrist for a pulse. He took a sigh of relief when he felt a faint heartbeat - Marty and this child was his life. They were his family, they were his everything. He dialed 911 and sat by Marty's side while they waited for the ambulance to arrive.

As soon as they got her to the hospital the doctor explained that Marty's blood pressure was too high. They presented John with two options. They told him that they could give her a medication that would lower her blood pressure, but that drug would most likely kill their unborn child or they could perform an emergency C-section and deliver the baby, but Marty's blood pressure could kill her while they were removing their child.

John felt so numb. How could he decide between the life of his child or his wife. He knew that Marty would want their child to survive at all costs so he signed the permission papers.

John paced around the waiting room while Bo and Nora tried to comfort him. "How's Marty and the baby?" John asked as soon as he saw the doctor.

"You have a beautiful baby girl. She's small and will need to stay in the ICU while her lungs develop more, but her prognosis looks good."

"And my wife?"

The doctor shook his head and John knew that he had lost Marty. He felt sick inside as he was plagued with what if's. If he had been home with Marty, would she still be here now?

John couldn't focus. All he felt was pain and anger. Bo and Nora tried to comfort him, but he couldn't hear them. He had to escape, the hospital walls were closing in on him so he took off.

-

Nora walked into Rodi's and found John pouring himself a shot of Vodka.

"We're closed," John slurred.

"I don't care. I came here to talk some sense into you and you're going to listen. It's been two days since your daughter was born and you haven't been to see her. What the hell is wrong with you John Mcbain?" Nora asked.

"I'm the last thing that she needs. Marty's dead because of me. I signed the papers that killed her."

"That's bullshit and you know it. You made the decision that Marty herself would have made. I know that you miss Marty, but you have to pull yourself together for your daughter's sake."

"I don't even remember if I told Marty I loved her before I left for work. I was running late and I just left her behind. I left her alone. I should have had more time with her."

"Marty knew that you loved her. We all knew John, it was written all over your face whenever she walked in the room. I know that your grieving, but your daughter still needs her father. She's already lost her mother she doesn't need to lose you too."

"I don't know how to do this without Marty? I don't know anything about fatherhood."

"You'll figure it out. We all figure it out as we go along. If you want to honor Marty's memory then you'll be the father that she believed you could be. I got to get home to Bo and Matthew, but think about what I said and go see your daughter," Nora said as she gave John a hug goodbye.

-

John walked into the ICU. His daughter was so tiny, but beautiful. She already looked like Marty. John wished that he could hold her, but she wasn't strong enough for that. "I'm sorry that I haven't been here for you little girl, but that's going to change. You're such a precious gift, the last gift that your mother ever gave me and I'm going to tell you all about her one day. I've chosen the perfect name for you. You will be named after the best woman I ever met. My little Margret Megan Mcbain."

John vowed to protect her and be the best father that he could to her. He already loved her with his whole heart.