AN: I was listening to this song by a band that was popular in my area when I was in high school and for some reason I couldn't get the idea of it being something Derek would sing out of my mind. This practically wrote itself. I don't know what it is or really where it came from, but I think I like it. PM me if you want the song info (since apparently I'm not allowed to use the lyrics in the story).
Penname: Milyko88
Title: Ode to Goodbye
Word Count: 700 words
Rating: K+
Spoilers: slight spoilers for 4.02 "Open Mic Plight" (and any previous episodes involving Sally)
Pairing: Derek/Sally (Derek/Casey if you squint at the ending)
Summary: "And (yes) it's poetic and (yes) it's pathetic but he really hopes the message isn't lost on Sally. This is his Ode to Goodbye." Alternate ending to 4.02 "Open Mic Plight".
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters and situations are property of their respected owners. I do not own Life With Derek or "Ode to Goodbye" by Daredevils Don't Die.
He can't believe her. Who does she think she is? Telling him he needs to write her a song, express his emotions. Doesn't she know who he is? He's Derek Venturi! He doesn't do emotions. He doesn't do f-f-feelings. And he sure as hell doesn't write songs about his (non-existent) feelings and perform them in front of an entire crowd of diners at the place of his employment. That's not him. That's not who he is.
He's Derek Venturi. Hockey legend, lead guitarist of D-Rock, high school god. The guy every girl wants to be with and every guy wants to be for the sole reason that he is who he is.
But does Sally understand that? No. She wants more from him. She wants him to be nice to his family, to spend time with his sisters (step- included), and write songs about his (still non-existent) feelings. Sally doesn't get it. She doesn't get him.
He knows what he has to do. He has to make her understand. No one gets to tell him he's not good enough. No one gets to try to change him. He likes Sally, he does. He wouldn't have spent so long chasing her if he didn't (right?). But this is too much. He isn't about to change his whole life, his whole self, because of her.
Okay, maybe Sally got to him (a little) because he finds himself writing a song, and, okay, (yes) maybe it has some emotion to it, but it's not about love and it's not about how he can't live without her, but it's still a song, and he's still going to sing it in front of God, his family, and everyone else in Smelly Nellie's. He thinks he's a little bit (a lot) crazy and he thinks he might possibly (most definitely) hate himself later for what he's about to do, but Sally's calling his name and he's stepping up to the microphone and the words come pouring out before he can second guess himself.
He spews out some sappy crap about the sun setting and goodbyes and killing him (softly). The chorus kicks in and he knows this is the right thing to do because (yes) this is poetic and pathetic and he hopes Sally sees that. There are more crappy, sappy metaphors about boats and sailing away and more sunsets, heavy hearts and oceans and leaving. And (yes) it's poetic and (yes) it's pathetic but he really hopes the message isn't lost on Sally. This is his Ode to Goodbye. Goodbye to being something he's not. Goodbye to her making him feel inadequate. Goodbye to the one girl he may have (possibly) sometime in the (not too distant) future grown to l-l-lo…okay, no that's just…poetic and pathetic. Does your heart feel anything? (Does it?)
He steps off the stage to stunned faces and a lack of applause. His eyes lock with Sally's and he knows she finally gets it, or (at least) gets the message he is trying to send. They are over. They're done. He's moving on. Figuratively and literally.
He walks away, fuming. He's angry, furious, (not at her) at himself. He can't believe he let her (attempt) to change him, let her (try to) manipulate him. He can't believe it took a stupid open-mic night for him to see how (entirely) wrong Sally is for him.
He punches the wall and screams in frustration, letting the anger out physically. He slumps to the ground holding his head in his hands, wondering when he became such a fool. He feels a weight settle beside him and waits for the silence that surrounds him to be disturbed.
"She didn't understand you, D." The quiet (feminine) voice says. He glances out of the corner of his eye and Casey (he should have known) stares at him. He pretends he doesn't hear her soft (pretty) voice so close to his ear. "You shouldn't have to change to be with someone. You taught me that."
He realizes she gets it. Casey gets it. She gets him. He thinks (maybe) this isn't so bad. Maybe it'll be okay as long as someone gets him. (Even if it is Casey.)