No Longer Yours

Jean. You watch me. So does Scott. So does Rogue. Hell, even Storm watches me. Because they all know what I have. You know what I have, Jean. I know you know.

The 'team' treat me nicely. They're told to do so because I'm the new one. The one that needs to be shown the ropes and taken good care of. But behind their façade I can see that they all despise me. They can see what I'm capable of and undoubtedly are aware of my history. Magneto and Mystique loved me by their side, but I got bored with them and wanted to meet new mutants instead of hanging around the same monotonous 'lets kill humans' ones every day. That's why I came here.

I have to admit, the school isn't that bad. The kids seem good enough although I find that spending all your time here teaching is a bit of a waste of talent. Imagine what you could do and who would hire you if they knew what kind of powers we had. But I suppose spending your life here isn't a total loss. I'm sure the kids will one day come to their senses and use their powers to the utmost beneficence.

You didn't like me, Jean. The moment I stepped into the professors office and into the midst of your team and when your eyes were cast upon me I felt it. There is no point in you denying it. The mistrust in the eyes of those around me could not hide even though the mutations of most of you were hard to spot. He was the only one who accepted me. And ironically, he loved you. But the fun and games you torturously played with him are now over. Because he is no longer in love with you. He is now in love with me.

Tell me how it felt, Jean, to have two of the best X-Men lured into your trap. Was one-eyed Scott not enough for you? So you felt like you'd innocently play with Logan's feelings for a while? And tell me how it felt, Jean, to see me walk in and take all that attention, importance and attraction away from you. Wasn't it obvious who was the belle of the ball when I cat-walked in?

And how do you feel to know that I have two mutations, one consisting of a similar power that you here possess? You are now not the only one who can make objects fly and slam doors without touching them. And does it pain you to see my other mutation, my cat-like ways that so beautifully compliment Wolverine's wild animal nature? My ears are sharp and my pupils can narrow as my eyes glaze over so that I can see in the dark. And my natural nails grow long and sharp when I'm ready to pounce and after I pounce they go back to normal as I always steadily land on my feet. My jump is high and my landing is soft. My teeth can change into vampire fangs and back again. I can control my mutations and dictate my features. I can manipulate the changing mutations in my body and around my body. And as you know, I too have a similar power to you. Now lets see, who will be playing the games.

Rogue likes me. She never liked you. She knows I'm with Logan and she doesn't mind. She thinks I'm 'cool'. I'd love you to hear what she thinks of you. She admires my mutations as I admire her authority over death. You don't know what we whisper about in the dark. Do you, Jean? She's a special child, Rogue. One that shouldn't be taken for granted. Especially one that attends your classes.

Logan likes me. You saw it in his eyes just as I did the first time I shook his hand. Our attraction bled from our animal aura and spilt into the room around us, drowning the team in our magnetism. From that moment, you were out of the picture. Our animal instincts understood each other's call, and our fascination for each other was mutual. And it still is.

What did you expect, Jean? Unruly animals get along. You and Cyclops are home-groomed and tamed. Logan and I are from the wild.

You all hate to admire me. You'd hate to admit it but I can feel it in the glares that are shared around me. You hate the way I can have him. Logan. The X-Men man who is out of your hands. You all watch me because you're amazed how a new acquaintance like me can just step in and access what you cannot. He is untouchable. If anybody gets too close, they will get hurt. But not me. You can't understand how I can appear and immediately claim him for myself. Well I can't understand how you had the chance to be with him, Jean, but you blew it. Left him hovering, waiting for you for too long. Teasing him with your eyes, giving unclear signs. You were with Scott but wouldn't fight off a kiss from Logan. He deserves more than your incomprehensible confusing games.

None of you could tame him. I saw it, the first day I was there. You watched him as if you were watching a dangerous lion on the loose, walking around freely, everyone scared when he would choose to bite. But his fierce façade was just another wall that I achieved to break through. He favoured me just as much as I favoured him. He saw the way you all looked at me, the same way you all looked at him, and he knew that we were the same. We were the different ones. We were the ones, standing in the midst, of the rest of you all darkly staring at us. That was when I knew that we were the humans. And you were the animals.

Scared animals. Everyone from the students to the professor noticed the affect that I had on the teachers, on you, and especially on Logan. They saw the way you X-Men would falter and nervously carry on teaching the class as I calmly stood at the side and watched. The students watched, not sure of why their strong teachers became powerless, not knowing how worried their X-Men were in case I might do something.

I told you, Jean. I knew none of you ever trusted me. All because I hung around Magneto for a long time doesn't mean I'm evil. The professor would still help Magneto if he were ever in danger, would he not? And although you all knew I speculated cynical thoughts in my head as I watched the poor restricted teaching in the classes, I never actually disrupted anything. I never would jump in and tell the students the truth about their immaculate prevailing powers that could easily control the world if they wanted it to. I haven't revealed to them the holy gift that is in their hands and that can be unleashed to great growing measures if only taught how to exploit them. Well, I haven't taught them yet, anyway.

Kids like stories. They know ours. Our story unfolded before their very eyes, your very eyes, as Logan and I spent more and more time watching each other. And in the night, we'd talk; when no one else was around to see which stepping-stones our paws would take to step towards each other. You were steadily being left behind as I exploded into the scene and you trailed away from his mind like fading smoke.

Jean. Pretty Jean. Beautiful Jean. Powerful Jean. Do these titles still belong to you? Do you still feel them? Or can you feel the shift in the spectrum as they slide to me? The pull of my presence sucking everything in. Everything that you had. Everything that you were. Everything that you loved. Now mine.

And everyone knows, Jean. They can see it. They can see you. Now they can see what you really are. You know what you really are. You are nothing. They've seen what I've done to you; they know what I'm capable of. And famously, they know that Logan is no longer in your league. Because of me. They know that I have taken your place. They all know. And there's nothing you can do about it.

Powerless Jean. Plain Jean. Normal Jean. I think that suits you better.

And now you helplessly watch as I sit in the lap of the man you once under appreciated, secretly wanted, stroking his hair, our purring damaging the secrets of your heart, his strong arms around my waist and ours eyes unable to look elsewhere, as you realise the painful truth; that everything I've said is right. And your eyes sting as you furiously exit the room, slamming the doors with the power that we both have. And I know what consumes you behind these walls.

Jean. Jean. You watch me. So do they all. Because you all know what I have.

I have what is no longer yours.